PTB's Writing Challenge 2013
by Team Edward Rules All
Summary: A series of fifty-two one-shots about Edward and Bella, based on varying prompts.
1. The Rocky Horizon

**Rocky Horizon**

**Challenge Number/Title: 1# Rocky Horizons**  
**Date Posted: 13/1/13**

**Fandom: Twilight**  
** Rating: T**  
** Genre: AH, HEA**  
** Content Descriptors: Romance, angst **  
** Character Pairing: Edward and Bella**

**Beta: bexie25  
**

* * *

Hi.

Goodbye.

They were the only two words we ever exchanged any more. There were no kisses, no random hugs, just curt nods that we gave to each other whenever one of us passed by the other. We had a routine, and it was one that never changed, never wavered in pattern.

We didn't have guests over because we didn't have time for them.

We never changed our habits because we didn't have the inclination to.

We ate dinner at work every night because there was no need to waste time coming home early and eating it there. There was no conventional gathering every night for us to talk about the troubles and pleasures of our day.

Even if there was, we still wouldn't talk.

I could just imagine the scene; two half-eaten boxes of Chinese sitting on the table, and the both of us bowed over our laptops, finishing work that we'd neglected to do at the office. I would imagine that one of us would walk away, eyes still glued to their laptop and then retreat to the couch, while the other escaped to our bedroom, their eyes also transfigured on their screen. The boxes of Chinese would be left abandoned, only to be tossed out in the morning because the both of us had completely forgotten about it and the only reason why we'd noticed it in the morning was because one of us had left an article of clothing draped over the chair.

At this rate you'd expect us to be roommates, cold roommates at that, but no, we were much more than that.

We were married.

And we had been married for ten long years.

People who didn't know us very well probably wondered how on earth we came to be, but the start of our relationship wasn't like it was now. It was as normal as anyone else's.

We were very young when we met; nineteen and naïve. Neither of us had proper jobs back then, having only just left school. I guess that's what crumbled our relationship – our passion for our line of work. Back then, Bella wanted to be a young adult writer, but that dream went down the drain when she realized how unpredictable the career was. Now she was an accountant, and made a lot of money for it, too.

I wanted to be a rock star – big surprise that that didn't work out. I was a doctor now, and the length of some of my shifts might be considered ridiculous to some people, but I loved it. I loved saving people's lives. It made me feel like I was achieving something major in the world. Five AM was the time I usually got up, and I generally arrived at work at seven. My shift usually ended at around ten, but only because I requested so many hours. When I go home, I do some filing work and then go to bed. On a Sunday I get home at four, a favour that the boss requests of me so he doesn't feel too guilty of making me work too many hours despite my willingness to do it, and repeat the process all over again.

Bella and I sleep in the same bed, but the distance couldn't be further away.

Like I said, our relationship didn't used to be like this. Hell, people looked up to us as being the perfect couple back then because of how cute we were. I used to kiss her all the time just for the hell of it, no matter where we were, or who was with us. We used to do everything together, and when I say everything, I mean everything. Including most things that men would back away from. Hell I used to keep tampons in my house in case her monthly cycle came when she was over there. But I did it because I loved her. She used to be my everything… until I got promoted and gained more shifts. Then work became my everything, and her job became hers.

At first we would spare a little time for each other – during the night, doing things that went way above a PG13 level. But as time went on, our little displays of affection grew more and more rare and we spoke to each other less every day, until it was only those two words.

Hi.

Goodbye.

I wasn't going to lie; I did miss her a little. I missed the times we used to have together and being able to kiss her at random. I missed her giggles and her crazy sense of humour.

But work was more important.

I had no time for her anymore.

Without our jobs we would have nothing. No nice big TV.

Not that we never watched it, but it was a nice prop.

No nice cutlery.

No spacious house.

No fancy computer.

No expensive paintings.

No lavish Aston Martin Vanquish V12 and Ferrari SS.

We wouldn't have any of those if we lost our jobs.

And besides, I loved my mine regardless.

It was better than wasting time, up-keeping a relationship with someone.

As per usual, I was greeted with absolute silence as I entered our house and claimed my usual spot on the sofa. It was Sunday, hence why I was home at four o'clock. Leaning my head against the armrest, I pulled out my laptop and loaded up a document I had been asked to look at for work. I scanned the words intently, and then began to take them in as I should, once I'd gotten the gist of it. My night was going pretty well until a heard a strange noise.

It was a quiet cough, originating from the doorway. In my shock, I fumbled with the laptop in my hands and almost dropped it – thankfully, I had it safe grip of it before it could hit the floor.

I glanced at the door to make sure that it was who I thought it was.

Yes, I was right.

It was Bella, my wife.

This was different. Why was she here? She never bothered to go into our living room any more. Something must have happened. I was instantly on red alert – despite our severed relationship, I still cared for her, still felt an urge to protect her. I wondered if she knew that. Probably not, I was the shittiest husband in the history of the world. Then again, she didn't exactly win an award for best wife either.

I looked her up and down, and felt my mouth go slack. I hadn't looked at her properly in ages. I couldn't even remember when the last time was that I had. In my memory she was definitely not this attractive. When I looked at her, I mean, really looked at her, I felt stupid for ever thinking of her as anything but attractive.

Her mahogany locks tumbled down past her shoulders, still vibrant and alive with a slight curl at the tips. Her lips were fuller than I recalled, and her brown eyes were startling in their intensity, but there was something different about them.

It took me a minute to realize, but when I did, I knew it wasn't their physical appearance. It was the lack of emotion there. Bags had also taken refuge under her eyes.

Last time I'd properly looked at her, her eyes had been sparkling, bright with joy and hope that was no longer relevant.

Last time she was definitely not this tired.

Last time she was definitely not this sad.

Seeing her look so defeated was like watching a lion, cower under the face of a whip. Bella was one of the strongest people I knew, or used to know, and to see her like this was maddening.

Suddenly I wondered what I looked like.

I hadn't looked at my own reflection adequately in months.

The medical career path didn't require stellar looks.

Then again, Bella used to say constantly that I did have them… this was before our relationship turned to dust of course.

Another cough brought me to the present, and I fixed my questioning eyes on hers, trying to decode the meaning there, what her purpose was here.

"Alice is coming over in an hour," she whispered, flinching when I hissed in surprise.

"Alice? As in your sister Alice?" I asked her angrily.

Boy it felt weird to be talking to her again, and in the tone I was using, even more so.

I even felt kind of self-conscious.

"Yeah, I know it's been years but she's decided to visit us in the USA again…" She sighed. "She insisted on visiting today. She sent me about a million texts during work and I had no choice but to invite her. I just thought I'd let you know."

Her face blushed crimson and then she turned around without warning, leaving the room before I could even let loose one of the many expletives that were at the periphery of my mind.

Well that was quick.

Better than two words I guess.

Then I thought of what she'd said, and groaned.

Alice, fucking meddling, Alice Swan!

I hadn't seen her since Bella and I got married, but she was one the most involved, in your face type of person that I knew. She always found a way to worm into your business and it would be beyond horrible to have her see what had happened between Bella and I, yet she was arriving in an hour.

An hour…oh shit.

I clicked the little X in the corner of the screen and then clicked hibernate on the computer, placing it down so it rested on the carpet. I then began to pace back and forth, pulling at my hair. This was my method of dealing with stress.

Not the best, I know.

Only one word resounded in my brain, played repeatedly until it felt like I was recalling the lyrics of a stupid youtube song.

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

"It's great to see you again," Bella gushed the second Alice walked through the front door, hugging her tightly. I sat on my favourite sofa, pretending to watch the mindless garbage on TV when I was really watching them from the corner of my eye.

For some reason Bella's words seemed forced, as if she were reading off a script.

But what would I know? I'd been ignoring her for three years.

"You look gorgeous, Bellsy." Alice squealed.

I repressed the urge to roll my eyes and cover my ears.

Her voice was as high pitched and annoying as I remembered.

The only thing that looked different about her was the length of her hair.

A pixie cut, really?

Long hair suited her better.

Her skin was still deathly pale, she was still shorter than should be possible without having dwarf syndrome, her hair was still inky black, and her eyes were still a bright blue – obviously.

She was the total opposite of Bella, which was a very good thing.

Not that it mattered. It didn't change anything.

"Edward, isn't it? Is that an _Armani_ jacket? You have great style dude. Better than you did before anyway." Alice ran over to me, her arms flailing in the air like a maniac as she flounced over to me like a princess.

And you wonder why I don't like her.

Yeah, I was wearing a stylish jacket, big deal. No need to throw a big celebration.

I simply nodded her.

"Ooh what's on TV? What's happening?" she asked eagerly, sitting two spots away from me like she owned the damn sofa.

Two words: _My sofa_.

I threw her a look of disdain, which she ignored. She patted on the seat in between her and me and urged Bella to sit there.

Not knowing quite what else to do, Bella walked over to us hesitantly and sat in between us, careful not to sit too close to me. I noticed how her knees were angled towards Alice's, and frowned.

I didn't have the damn black plague. She could at least attempt to act under the pretence that we were a happily married couple.

Then again, I wasn't doing a brilliant job either.

Alice chattered on aimlessly to Bella about some shit that I didn't even bother to follow, when suddenly she spoke an observation aloud that made my body freeze in panic.

"Why are you guys so far away? Go cuddle with your hubby Bella. I know you want to." She chuckled, shoving Bella so she fell awkwardly into my side. Ill at ease, I pushed her gently off me so she became upright and was a comfortable distance away from me. Bella crossed her arms across her chest and shifted closer to Alice.

Alice's eyes widened with shock and then brightened with understanding.

"You two had a fight didn't you? And I can tell that this has been one hell of a fight," she said seriously, looking at the both of us sternly, as if we were children who had just been caught stealing chocolate from their parents fridge.

I scowled.

"Time for…couple therapy!"

"Alice, no," Bella begged. I could hear actual desperation blatant in her tone.

I simply glared at Alice, for once agreeing with Bella.

"I don't care what you two say to me. It worked for Garrett and Kate; it will definitely work for you two. Lucky I brought it with me."

"It?" I hissed at the same time that Bella exclaimed, "What?"

Alice stuck her hand in her bag and began rummaging through it for something. When I saw what she pulled out, I wasn't the only one who was groaning.

"If you two see how happy Jasper and I were up England then maybe you'll reconsider your own relationship status," she said smugly as if what she was planning to do was the greatest of all ideas.

I doubted a DVD of her and her 'perfect' husband Jasper, would help Bella and I.

Hell, what was I saying? We didn't need help! We were fine as we were. Our relationship was fine. I didn't need a companion. She was just there because she was. She helped pay the bills, right? I felt like such a sleaze for saying the last one but it was true.

"Alice, we're fine," Bella assured her hastily.

"Suck it up, we're watching it."

The selfish, self-centred bitch! I didn't want to look at her shit photos when I could be reading the rest of the document that my boss asked to read. What a waste of time!

She jumped to her feet and put her disk in the DVD player, tapping her foot against the floor as she did so as if the concept of being motionless was foreign to her.

The DVD played immediately, and judging from the first picture, we were going to be here a while.

It was of Alice and Jasper grinding against each other in a nightclub.

"That night was so fun, and the drinks there were so cheap and nice. Oh and Jasper and I met Peter and Charlotte there. Oh they're like the coolest people ever, you have to…"

I tried to block her voice out and failed.

This was going to be a long night.

The only time throughout the whole slideshow that I ever actually listened to what either Alice or Bella was saying – three hours later – was when Alice announced that the picture on the TV was the last one. It was of Alice and Jasper sitting at the top of what looked to be a mountain, their heads touching as they smiled at the camera. They were wearing rock climbing gear so I guessed that they'd actually gotten off their asses and climbed up there.

Kudos to them.

I wasn't sure whom Bella was speaking to when she began talking, but the longing in her voice stopped me from drifting off into my thoughts again and I actually listened to what she was saying.

"One day, I want to climb a mountain like that and stare at the horizon without any worries or issues from work. I want to stare at the horizon and be content with what I have and have no reason to back down from that mountain. I want to have nothing that is tying me to the earth at that minute. I want that horizon to mean a new beginning. I want to watch it with someone I love and know that that person is everything to me, that that person took the journey with me. One day I will do that."

"Great idea! That mountain was so fun to climb. You should totally do that," Alice encouraged.

Her only reply was "mhmm."

"And that's the end," Alice said, disappointment clear in her voice as the screen turned to black. She kneeled down and retrieved the disk from the DVD player.

"I'm going to bed now," I muttered, nodding at the both of them curtly.

Alice frowned. "But it's only seven."

Was she really that blind that she didn't know how much I detested her? I'd have to get it tattooed across my face for her to get the message, it seemed.

"Not to sleep."

And then I grabbed my laptop and walked out of the room.

Thankfully, Alice didn't drop by again. She had many other people to visit – or maybe she finally noticed my hostility towards her.

Maybe she wasn't that thick after all.

Or maybe it took her darling husband to make her realize.

Wouldn't surprise me.

Following the next day, my life went back to its normal monotonous state. Bella and I still said hi and goodbye in the morning, although it was kind of awkward saying it now after last night.

February passed us in a blur.

Then March.

And then April.

Work was very much the same, although I had being given even less hours due to the growing number of staff there. Stupid pricks!

Something happened though, on the twenty-first of that month, something that couldn't be reversed, that shocked me to my core, and left me frozen, unable to comprehend what had just happened.

Much like the afternoon where Alice had visited, Bella made a rare appearance in the living room, hovering hesitantly by the door, biting her lip nervously and wringing her hands out uncharacteristically.

If I'd thought that the night I was forced to spend with Alice was bad, then what was about to happen was a fucking nightmare. And it only took five little words to shatter everything.

And when I say everything, I mean everything.

Including the things I didn't think I needed but actually needed more than anything else.

Those especially.

"Edward, I want a divorce."

The length of a few heartbeats passed; an inhale and an exhale and then...

"What?"

Her eyes swept to the floor and stayed there as she spoke, as if she were afraid to catch even a glimpse of my reaction. "This shouldn't surprise you. I'm surprised you even know that we're married."

"What?" I said again, stunned.

"Well, all you do all day is sit there, and then go to work and then come back here. You never talk to me anymore, you never offer to spend time with me, never ask me how my day went. It's like living with a robot. You do what you're programmed to do and nothing else. I can't take it anymore."

"Bella, you don't need to do this," I told her softly, fearfully.

"Yes I do. I'm wasting my time here. It's not like you'll miss me anyway, I'm just a decoration to you, another source of income. You used to love me… but that's gone now, I know. Anyone can see that. I'm nothing to you anymore."

"That's not true. Please don't do this. Please!" I pleaded. I had no idea why I was begging. What difference did it make if she left. She was right; we didn't have anything anymore. Yet something inside of me was screaming at me to stop her from leaving, something inside of me yearned to grab her hand, capture her around her waist and never let her go. I knew to trust my instincts, even if they didn't make sense.

"Where is this coming from? This has been going on for three years."

"Three years. I can't believe I wasted three years believing that maybe one day you'd stop thinking about work and start caring about me."

That one really hit a nerve. "You're one to talk, _Mrs. I-never-stop-working_!"

"The only reason I got so involved with my work was because I had nothing else anymore. Because you didn't love me, because you broke my heart and I needed something to focus on to get over that until you got your act together and tried to solve this. But you never did, and I'm fed up with it."

There was something that she wasn't saying. Something that I knew would hurt more than all of the wounds that she'd already inflicted combined.

The second I realized what it was, the second I wanted to banish the disturbing thought away to where it could never return.

She wouldn't. She couldn't!

She was mine.

No!

"There's someone else, isn't there?" I snarled.

"Yes." Her answer had the same effect as a slap in the face would.

"Who?" My voice had lowered in volume, and even I could hear the defeat in it.

"His name is Jacob. I met him at work. I want to take a chance with him because he seems like a decent guy. He _actually_ cares about me."

_No. NO!_

I sunk to my knees, unable to comprehend what she'd just told me.

"Please," I whispered, unsure even myself of what I was asking for anymore.

"Why do you care now of all times?" she asked, her voice as sharp as the crack of a whip. "You didn't give a shit about me before, why now?"

Tears trembled in her voice, and I didn't dare look into her eyes, for fear of what I might find there.

"Just don't go."

I closed my eyes, unable to take it anymore.

"I'm going to move out either way, and I can't get the divorce papers for a while, but until then I need your approval."

Her voice had taken on a soft edge as if speaking in such a tone would make me comply. My eyes snapped open and anger flared up inside of me unexpectedly – from all different causes.

Because of Bella; because of what she was about to do, and from what she'd already said.

From the thought of this Jacob guy, from the fact that Bella had another man in her life. I hadn't even met him, yet I wanted to punch his face in.

From my own pitiful grovelling, how disgusted I was with myself at how low I'd sunk.

And from the thought of being completely alone.

The words I yelled didn't seem of my own accord, but I couldn't take them back even if I wanted to. "Fine, go. Move out. Go move in with Jacob. According to you, I don't give a shit about you. So yes, leave. Now!"

She didn't say anything in reply, just departed the room as quickly as she could and left a bitter taste in the air.

My anger spiked to its absolute maximum at seeing her leave. I swear I could see red. I walked over to one of the wooden cupboards in the room, fists clenched almost to the point of pain.

And then I began to punch the shit out of it.

Fine, she could fucking leave! I could manage perfectly well without her. I always had. I didn't need her. She was right; I didn't love her any more. If I did, then I would've put up more of a fight, right? Either way it was probably a blessing rather than a curse that she was fucking gone.

Day one:

Nothing has changed…nothing has changed. It's not like I ever spoke to her anyway.

Day two:

Is it possible that the house has grown even more silent?

Day three:

Why the fuck does the chair feel so bare? Oh right. Cause there's not a fucking cardigan draped over it. I do not miss her. I do _not _miss her.

Day four:

What's with this constant clogging in my throat? I'm not sick but I'm not well either. It's not her…it's _not_ her.

Day five:

I fucking miss those two words.

Even my work performance was off. My job didn't appeal to me like it usually did. All of my patients pissed me off, even the ones that weren't doing it on purpose. Hell, everything seemed to piss me off lately.

Even my boss Carlisle noticed something was up. He summoned me to his office during one of our busiest hours in the day. Carlisle wasn't one to avoid being blunt. He always got straight to the point no matter the situation. I used to admire that about him, but now – like everything else – it pissed me off.

"Cullen, is everything all right? You're not… well, you haven't been yourself lately.

His hazel eyes portrayed his obvious concern and I sighed.

"I'm fine."

"Bullshit."

My jaw dropped. Wasn't there some sort of protocol he was supposed to follow? I thought bosses were the epitome of professional?

"Everything's fine," I insisted.

"Don't lie to me, Cullen."

"Really, it's fine."

"I'm well aware that you're not the happiest person around. No offense."

"None taken," I muttered.

"But this week you've been more than unhappy… you've been… depressed. Is there something you need to let me know? I can let you take some time off if that's what you need."

"I'm fine, I can work."

"You know what," he said after a minute of thoughtful silence. "I'm going to make you take a week off work."

"That's very kind of you, but it's unnecessary."

"No, I'm demanding for you to take it."

"And if I don't want to?" I said dryly.

"Then I'll fire you, simple as that?"

I gasped. "You can't be serious."

"Try me."

His face was hard set and the determination there was impossible to match.

I wasn't going to get anywhere with this.

"Fine, I'll take a week off."

"Good, starting now. Go relax at home, and I'll see you in a week."

"Thanks Carlisle," I told him out of courtesy. I suppose someone else would've been jumping for joy at his offer, but my job was my life.

And I'd lost my wife over it.

So I guess work was my wife and family now too.

For the first time in years, I didn't unpack my laptop from my briefcase and lean against the couch the second I got home. No, I went to my bedroom, threw my briefcase against the bed and went rummaging through the bottom of my closet for a certain object, one I hadn't thought about since I'd first been given it.

Something Carlisle had said bothered me; had latched itself onto my mind on the drive home.

There was something I needed to see.

Aha! My hands grasped the edges of the familiar DVD case with fervour as I raised it out of the pile of shit it was under. I was almost afraid to open it in case there was no disc inside. At first I thought Bella had taken it, and I couldn't deny that there was a small part inside of me that was hoping she had.

Wanting to get my plan over and done with, I opened the disk case, sighed with relief when I saw that the DVD was in there, and then put it on, drumming my fingers nervously against the bed post while it loaded.

My heart thudded almost painfully as I looked at the first picture that had appeared on the screen.

It was of Bella and me.

Together.

I had my arms wrapped around her waist and she was giggling into my chest, only barely facing the camera, with only half of her face visible. She was wearing the customary white veil and dress, and I the conventional black suit. I was smiling like I'd just won the lottery.

This was our wedding DVD.

Looking at this DVD probably meant I was a masochist, or at least crazy. But I needed to see the difference between the both of us then and the both of us now. I grabbed the remote and hit pause, staring at both our faces for an immeasurable period of time. Yes, Bella was beautiful, angelic almost. But that wasn't what caused me to be so transfigured.

It was me.

How happy I was.

How carefree I was.

How _in love_ I was.

It was present in Bella's face too, but mine was more of a shock because I didn't remember ever looking like that. Hell I didn't ever remember feeling like that, ever being that happy.

The next was the same.

Except in this one the both of us were laughing.

I wanted that.

I wanted _us. _

I hadn't realized how much I missed the old me.

The old _us_.

Without even thinking the idea through or of what the repercussions might be concerning my mental health, I ran like a child to the bathroom, and skidded to a stop behind the sink cabinet. I leant my palms against it and bowed my head for a minute before finally looking up and staring at the mirror above it – at my reflection. I watched my mouth widen in horror as I took in my appearance.

My pallor was so noticeable that I could be labelled as a vampire; my cheeks were gaunt, my bronze hair was in desperate need of a trimming, my lips were dry and scabbed and my eyes – hell, my _eyes_ – were empty, void of any emotion, with insanely dark shadows underneath. Yes, my eyes were still green, but a dull green, a flat green.

It was such a ghastly, such a gruesome contrast to myself in my wedding video that we almost looked like two different people.

Yes, there were still traces of the boy who wanted to be a rock star, but they were very faint and almost completely overshadowed by the sickness that had taken over my features.

I knew that my appearance wasn't a product of simply the last five days. I had been like this for years, ever since I took that stupid job. It was the first time I had titled my job us such and I meant the insult more than I had ever meant it when I said that I had loved it.

It had cost me everything.

It had cost me Bella.

Bella!

With startling clarity, my mind began flipping through a dozen different memories of us together, of us when we were alive.

_The first time we met. `_

_I bent over on the gritty sidewalk and took a few necessary breaths. I'd just run about two kilometres – this was what I had to suffer to maintain the six-pack I was so proud of – and was completely out of breath. My legs hurt like a bitch too. Running through the street was better than a gym though because there were more things to look at, and I had more motivation. Although I felt like collapsing onto the floor, and just lying there for a good ten minutes, I straightened myself up and was preparing myself to start running again when I felt a light tap on my shoulder. I turned around to see a pretty girl about my age – eighteen – huffing and puffing and holding out a familiar object that almost caused me to have a heart attack when I saw it clenched in her hand. _

"_I'm sorry, but you dropped this, and I thought you might need it, I don't know what's in there; I didn't look. Resisting the urge to snatch the personal item from her hands, I took in from her at an appropriate speed and thanked her profusely. _

_Once I had the little black book in my hand, I shoved it in my pocket straight away and stared up at the girl, looking at her properly for the first time. _

_I was mind-blown. _

_She wasn't pretty. _

_She was fucking beautiful. _

_Big brown eyes that looked away from mine nervously, full lips that were demanding to be kissed, cheeks that were pink tinged and alive…_

_I felt myself leaning forward and then quickly straightened myself when I realized what I was doing. Before I could even think to stop myself, I blurted out,_

"_What's your name?"_

"_Oh…um, I'm Bella."_

_Her shyness was so endearing. _

"_And you?" she asked after a minute when I didn't say anything else. _

"_Edward. Nice to meet you," I smiled. _

_It was from that day forward that I never felt the urge to look at another woman again. Bella was it for me. I could tell. _

_There would be no one else. _

The first time we kissed, two months later.

_I was over at her house, sitting comfortably in one of her arm-chairs, and waiting for her to return from feeding her birds when I heard a frightened shriek from the backyard. Knowing her voice well enough by now, I jumped to my feet and ran to the source of the noise, scared of what I'd find there. _

_When I got there, I wasn't quite what to do. Bella was kneeling at the floor of her parents Avery, tears glistening in her eyes. I noticed immediately what she was upset about. The door to the Avery was wide open, and no birds resided in the cage. _

"_My parents are going to kill me… and what about those poor birds! They're going to die out there! I'm dead. I'm dead. I'm dead!" _

_I walked over to her, took her face in my hands and did something that could've ruined everything if I wasn't so lucky. _

_I kissed her. _

_She shut up immediately, her mouth freezing in surprise. But it didn't take long before she got over that shock and responded with fervour, kissing me back eagerly. _

_Yes, I'd kissed girls before but there was something different here…something more. _

_Yes, our kiss was like any other kiss but ours… it was better. _

_I wrapped my arms around her waist and her hands reached up to curl around my neck. _

_The kiss was longer than a customary first kiss should be, but neither of us minded because it was perfect. _

The day I took her ice-skating and had to keep catching her because her clumsiness kept coming into play – I remember continuing to hold onto her even when we were on safe ground just because I couldn't find it in me to let her go. She felt so right in my arms.

The day we went to visit my parents in my hospital shortly before they died of swine flu. She never let go of my hand once, sensing how much I needed both her physical and emotional support. I think I fell in love with her that day.

The day she had a cold, and I stayed by her side all day so she wouldn't get lonely – not even caring when I myself got sick in the process.

The time when we spent the entire night texting each other about things that didn't even matter even though we were due to see each other the next day.

The afternoon when we had a _Star Wars _marathon and I burnt the popcorn in the microwave, so we just had to eat the charred remains as we cuddled on the sofa.

The day when I told her I loved her.

The night when I proposed to her…

_She used to love code crackers, so I generated one online and gave it to her with the words 'Will you be my wife' as the answer. I could tell when she'd solved it, because her eyes lit up and a grin bigger than the size of this planet graced her face, and she catapulted herself into my arms, kissing my face everywhere she could, whispering 'yes, of course.'_

Our wedding day; the best day of my life...

_Our wedding was very small, just us. Her parents didn't like me very much, and even back then, I didn't like Alice at all, so we decided to get married in a court house with vows of our own. Not very romantic, I know, but I made sure that the part afterwards was. Flowers, champagne, dimmed lights, scented candles…Bella was very impressed, but her shock turned into desire very quickly and we didn't emerge from the hotel room until nine AM the next morning. _

Our honeymoon...

_We spent our honeymoon in Fiji, both wanting to visit a tropical destination that was overseas. We spent a substantial amount of time in the cabin that we'd hired, maybe even more so than on the exquisite beaches. But neither of us cared. We had more fun then we'd ever had before on that small island. _

_Either way, we had one of the best two weeks in our lives. _

Then came the real world.

Yes, we had fights but they were solved in a day.

Yes, there were horrible times; times when we were both sure that nothing would be okay ever again. The most horrible of those times was when Bella fell pregnant but we had a miscarriage with four months to go until the baby due.

It took us months to recover from that.

But the good times always outweighed the bad, and nothing meant more to me then her love.

Back then.

What changed?

I knew it was my job. I'd blamed it many times, but now that I thought about it, was my job really worth it?

Was it worth losing the most important things in my life? Losing the things that weren't material, things that were irreplaceable?

Yes, without my job, the objects I had today wouldn't be mine, but did I really want them? Did I really need them?

I knew the answer immediately.

No, I wanted Bella.

I_ needed _Bella.

Bella meant happiness, Bella was light, Bella was love!

Our wedding video was a wake-up call. Bella was right! I had been ignoring her.

It was my fault that our marriage failed.

It was my fault that the both of us were miserable.

It was my fault that the joyous people we used to be no longer existed.

I had done this.

Me.

And I needed to fix it now.

I needed to apologise to Bella, make her understand the epiphany I had had.

But first there was something else I needed to do first.

I couldn't ask for her to take me back if I hadn't done this first.

What I was thinking of was something positively crazy, something only a complete idiot would even think to do.

Well yes, I'd already proved that I was a fucking idiot.

But I knew that if I was going to turn my life around and get Bella back then this is what I'd have to do first.

And I'd never been so sure of anything in my life.

I knocked on the familiar wooden door of one of the many rooms in _Virginia Mason Hospital_, accidently rattling the sign that read 'Dr. Carlisle Cullen,' in my haste.

The man in question appeared on the other side of the door, and his lips turned down into a frown. "I thought I told you to…"

I cut him off. "I quit."

The words were so liberating, so right.

He merely nodded. "All right."

"All right? That's all you say?" I demanded.

He smiled grimly. "I can see what this place is doing to you and we have more than enough staff here. It's been a pleasure working with you, but I can't say that I'm sorry that you're leaving. It is very difficult to watch a man grow progressively weaker every day and to not be able to do anything about it. I've said enough… go now and do something that you love. The medical profession is not for everybody."

"There's nothing I need to sign?" I asked disbelievingly.

"I'll handle that."

"Thank you," I told him with utmost respect. "I wish you all the best."

"And even more so for you," he replied sincerely.

I walked out of my boss' door on a high. This was only the beginning of my journey back to life and I'd already taken the first few steps without faltering.

A few minutes after I had stepped out of the building and was sitting in my parked car, I retrieved my phone out of my pocket and dialled the one number that I hadn't dialled in forever, but still remembered like one would remember riding a bike. After about thirty seconds of pressing the phone intently to my ear, the voice I was hoping to hear spoke, but she didn't say the words I was hoping for.

'_Guess you'll have to leave a message, because I'm not here right now.' _

Dammit!

Either she didn't have her phone on her or she was ignoring me.

It was probably the latter.

I couldn't say I didn't deserve it.

There was only one other thing I could do, it seemed.

She couldn't ignore me any longer if I did what I was thinking of doing.

I got in my Aston Martin Vanquish and drove in a direction that was almost as familiar to me as her phone number was. Her parents' house wasn't far from where I lived, so thankfully, I didn't have any time to pussy out on the way there.

I didn't even give myself any time to think of what I was going to say as I threw the car door open and walked across the path to her house. What I saw on the front porch of her house, however, made me freeze in my tracks.

Bella had her arms wrapped tightly around the waist of a tall, dark skinned guy with cropped black hair. He wore a business suit, and had his lips pressed to Bella's forehead with the intensity a lover would. His hands rested possessively on her hips and I felt unrelenting fury rise up inside of me at the sight. I knew immediately that this was Jacob.

And I already hated his fucking guts.

How dare he put his hands on my wife!

I was going to kill him!

My hands clenched into unyielding fists and I took a few steps forward, ignoring the emotional pain pulsating within me at the utter blasphemy standing in front of me.

The guy – Jacob – noticed me before Bella did, and his eyes narrowed with obvious contempt.

I was sure mine were doubly more fired up than his.

"Jake what's…" she trailed off when she saw me standing there.

"Excuse me," she said to Jacob, teeth gritted. "Could you please wait for me inside while I talk to him?"

Oh, so I was _him _now.

How the hell was I going to get her back now?

"Why are you here?" she hissed once Jacob had gone back inside the house and shut the door behind him. "I told you that I don't want to see you any more until the divorce papers are ready to be signed."

"I don't want a fucking divorce. I want you."

"You had three years to salvage our relationship. It's too late now. I'm not going to waste my time arguing with you over things that will never change."

Then, in a typical Bella fashion, she twisted around and went back into the house before I could even think to tell her about my epiphany.

This complicated things.

I was going to need a pretty big ass plan if I was going to prove to her how much she meant to me, how much I had changed, how much I still wanted to change.

I had no plan B; that was the problem.

So when I got home, I did what I did best.

I paced.

Think creative. Think big. Think extravagant. Think crazy. Think… what would impress Bella?

Think. Think. Think!

My pacing still hadn't ceased after an hour of continually doing so, and I hadn't even tired due to my thought process.

Even when my pacing ceased due to the late hour and lack of energy, I spent about three hours tossing and turning in bed, trying to think of something that would make her see how much I needed her.

Think. Think. Think!

But I succumbed to sleep anyway, still no appropriate ideas having come to mind.

My dreams were strange, nightmarish, and involved Alice.

The stupid bitch was haunting me in my dreams too, wailing about how her relationship slideshow had failed and had only driven us further apart.

When I awoke, I was eager to shake off the dream quickly. Why did I have a dream about Alice's fucking slideshow? It was painful enough to witness the first time, let alone see some of the images again in my dreams. Even Bella seemed bored of them at the time. The only one that grabbed her interest was the one of the mountain…the one of the mountain…

I sat up in bed, my eyes wide, my heart pounding.

Could I?

Was it possible?

Would this make her realize?

Would this work?

It was crazy, but I sure as hell was going to try.

One Google search and a trip to Newtons Outfitters later, I was staring up at the high summit of Ruen Mountain.

I was going to climb that motherfucker, whether I came out alive or not.

This was the key to getting Bella back.

I wasn't going to let fear overrule me.

Not now.

Adrenaline spiked through me as I began to set up the appropriate safety gear and prepared myself for my climb.

I wore a small backpack, with some food, water and a sleeping bag inside it. This would come in use later. My phone rested in my pocket, under the many layers of clothes I was wearing – it got very cold up there - and I hoped on my life it wouldn't fall, otherwise all of my plans would be ruined.

I was so damn thankful that I'd climbed a mountain before – back in year eleven they had a rock climbing camp and I, being very adventurous back then, decided I'd go on it – although the one that I'd climbed then wasn't this big, and I'd had a guide.

I just had to trust my instincts now.

There was only one more thing to do and that was to check that I'd set up everything correctly. Then I needed to do it again, and again.

As long as it guaranteed my safety, I didn't really care how long it took.

Ten minutes later and I was ready to begin my climb. I placed both of my hands against the rock of the mountain and took a deep breath.

Time to begin the most physical and symbolic journey of my life.

Harsh wind whipped at my face, and I nearly lost my balance for the fiftieth time. My hands – though thick gloves made for this shit, covered them – ached and so did my legs and neck. But I couldn't stop. I couldn't! I needed to keep going. I needed to get Bella back. Bella! _My_ Bella!

Her name was the only thing that kept me going.

The summit seemed incredibly far away, but my goal seemed so much closer.

_Bella, I love you. Bella, I'm so sorry._

The higher up I got, the harder it was to navigate my hands and feet and the colder it got.

But I persevered… for her.

Clouds came and went, the sky proving that time was moving faster than I wanted it to. I wanted to be up there by nightfall, but it looked like the sun was setting.

I needed to do this before it was too late; before I lost her completely.

Up, up. The only way was up. The only way to her was up.

Did my fingers deceive me or were they at the top of something? I looked up, and saw that yes, I was at the summit. I had made it! There were only a few steps to go. I heaved myself up onto the mountaintop and collapsed there, amongst the rocky terrain. My whole body ached and my tongue begged for hydration, so I slid my backpack off my back and grabbed the bottle of water that I had stored there, greedily savouring every last drop of the sip that I allowed myself to take. Before I knew it, I was closing my eyes, and had fallen asleep.

My eyes slowly fluttered open, and I groaned – both at the cold and at the pain my body bore.

_What? Where am I?_ Oh shit!

I jumped up immediately, wincing at the way my muscles protested.

Bella, I was here for Bella.

The sky told me that it was the beginning of night – maybe seven PM.

Yes, there was still time to do what I needed to do.

Fiddling under my coats for my iPhone, I grabbed at it and held it up to the sky as if in an offering.

Holy fuck.

The website I'd checked was right.

There was reception up here!

My plan might just work!

Now it was up to Bella to decide our fates.

I clicked it on, put in my password and went to make a video message. Angling it so you could see me as well as the rocky terrain around me, I pressed begin and began to speak.

This was for her. This message was to her. I just hoped she'd listen.

"Bella, there are so many things that I need to say, but I need you keep watching, all of it, please. That's all I ask of you. Okay, well if you're still here then I want you to know something. Your leaving – as well as a few other occurrences – were a big wake up call for me. Yes, work was my life. Yes I fucked up our relationship. Yes, basically everything you said to me that day was true. I did put work over you, and I did treat you like garbage."

"But there was one thing that you got wrong. I never stopped loving you, not even those days when we only said two words to each other. Hell, I miss those two words more than anything. But more than that, I miss us. I miss the way we used to be. I watched our wedding video, and that man getting married to you is a complete stranger to me. That man was content with life, completely in love with his wife and nothing could take that away."

"I've forgotten what it means to be happy and I want that for myself again. But I know the only way I can be happy is to be with you. Those two words you shared with me every day meant more to me than a whole ten years of work at the hospital. And I'm done. I don't want that life anymore. I don't want money any more. Money can't buy happiness. I know that now. Seeing you walk away reminded me how much I love you, and I can't let that go. Yes, we've been at the lowest of the low for quite a long period of time now, but I'm willing to start again, hell I want to."

"If it means completely starting over, and acting like two people who have only just met each other, then I'm willing to try that too. As long as I don't lose you, as long as I get a second chance, I'll do it. I won't let work get in the way of our relationship ever again. I even quit my job at the hospital this morning."

"I'm unemployed, standing at the top of Ruen Mountainand making a video call. Surely you can see how much I'm willing to try again. You once said that one day you'd like to climb a mountain just to watch the horizon, to look down at the earth, and know that nothing is tying you there. I know exactly what you mean. I feel like anything is possible up here. That everything might just be all right. I love you Bella, and I'm going to wait up here until you decide to come join me. Until then I'll continue to watch the horizon and keep hoping that one day you'll make your way up here and take me back."

"A chance is all I want. I'm sorry, so sorry about everything. But if you do decide to let me in again then I will do everything in my power to make you the happiest woman on earth. I'm dedicated to this relationship now, and only you can decide if you want to commit to it again. Until then, I'll be waiting. I love you. Truly I do."

I pressed the stop button on the video call and exhaled in relief.

Now all I could do was wait for her.

Time passed and no one came.

_You have to give her time to get up here, _I argued with the negative part of myself that scorned at my plan.

Eventually I had to force myself to sleep.

The sleeping bag wasn't comfortable but it was better than the uneven ground of the mountain. It would have to do.

Morning arrived, and she still hadn't turned up.

_As if she'd get here in the middle of the night_, _that would be plain crazy_,' I berated myself.

There was nothing to do but stare at the edge of the mountain and occasionally watch the horizon.

I wanted to see her the second she emerged out of the mountain.

I wanted to know the second that my life was repaired.

A few more hours passed.

No sign of her.

I fell asleep again, but this time with a full stomach. The frozen rations I had brought were horrible. But I was hungry, so I eat them.

And when I awoke, I continued to watch.

It might've been two, days perhaps three when I began to lose hope that she would ever take me back.

She was probably sitting on her front porch with the Jacob guy, huddled up against him in the freezing cold while he had his arm curled around her waist.

Then soft as a whisper, maybe not today, but one day he would, he would tell her that he loved her, and she would whisper it back to him, smiling widely and kissing him adoringly on the lips.

Either way she would forget about me.

On that day I would become a distant memory.

And from then on, a horrible nightmare.

But Jacob would soothe those nightmares.

And she'd be fine.

I wasn't sure which emotion was more dominant.

The jealousy or the pain; there was a lot of both.

I almost didn't hear her voice. I wasn't facing the right direction, having completely given up on the thought of her climbing up here and forgiving me. Stupidly, I even thought it was a figment of my imagination that had whispered my name.

That was until I stood up, turned around and saw her flushed face staring at me.

I gasped and took a step closer, unable to believe what I was seeing.

Could it be?

Her doe eyes were filled to the brim with remorse, and her lips trembled as if she wished to say something but couldn't find the words.

Tears glistened in the corner of her beautiful brown eyes and I reached over and brushed them away tenderly.

She was here!

My Bella.

Here. Now. With me.

Not with Jacob.

With _me_.

Here.

I smiled.

Actually smiled.

"You're here," I said, my voice cracking slightly in my emotion.

"I'm here." She nodded, the tears spilling freely onto her cheeks now.

Unable to take it anymore, I pulled her into my arms and embraced her as tightly as my arms would allow.

"I'm so sorry. I'm so, so sorry," I murmured into her hair as she sobbed into my shoulder. Her fingers dug fiercely into the back of one of the many jackets I was wearing but I could still feel the impact on my skin, as if she was as desperate to never let go as I was.

"I meant everything I said, every word," I promised her.

"I know," she whispered, her voice choked up. "I could tell."

"Nothing is going to get that out of hand ever again. If I piss you off, or I'm not paying enough attention to you, then you need to tell me, alright."

She laughed, but the noise was strangled.

"It won't even get to that. I promise. I swear to you." My words were an oath.

"I knew you were in there somewhere. It just took you a while to find yourself! To find the real you – the one I love so much."

"Why did it take you so long to get up here?" I asked, stroking her dark hair reverently.

She pulled away from me abruptly and stood up. I let my hand drop awkwardly and looked up at her, suddenly afraid that she'd changed her mind.

"It's a long story." She held out her hand. "I'll tell you all of it once we're sitting down. I never want to stand up ever again after that mountain climb. Ruen Mountain? Really?"

"It was the only mountain I could think of?" I said sheepishly, accepting her hand, and sitting with her on my sleeping bag.

When we were seated, neither she nor I took our hand away, nor did I want to. I rubbed soothing circles into hers with my thumb, wanting her to know all I couldn't say with words.

I smiled at her, ready for her to begin.

"That video of yours was certainly something. Though, of course, I didn't fully believe what you said in it at first. It took a couple of people to make me realize how much you'd really changed and to remember what we used to have. Two people in fact."

"Who?" I asked bewilderedly. Last I knew not many people were a fan of me.

"My mother and Jacob."

"Jacob?" I exclaimed, dropping her hand in surprise.

She smiled. "I was pretty shocked too. I thought he really liked me. I'll tell you about that part later though."

She took my hand in hers again.

"Anyway, my mum was in the other room when I watched the video and she could hear everything you were saying on it."

"But I thought she hated me?"

"Not after hearing that. She sat me down and told me what she thought of the whole thing."

"And what was that?"

"She said,_ 'that was the most extravagant apology I have ever heard. The man wouldn't even leave work for a minute, a week ago, from what you've told me, let alone take who knows how many days off work to climb a mountain as an apology. This is pretty serious stuff darling."_

"And then I reminded her that you had supposedly quit work and that I wasn't sure if you really had. _'There's one way to make sure of that. Contact his boss,' _she said.

"I wasn't even sure if it really mattered, and I told her that, but then she told me something that made me doubt everything."

"Must have been a pretty big speech," I mumbled.

"Not big, just effective. These were her exact words, and trust me, I remember, because they have been stuck replaying in my head for the past three days. She said, '_Look Isabella, people form habits, habits that are very difficult to get out of, and at most times, the person doesn't want them to break. Edward probably didn't realize how absorbed he was by his job until it was too late, and by then you two were driven too far apart, that he just decided to keep up his habit. When you decided to come and stay here, he realized how much he missed the relationship you two used to have and decided to turn his life around, hence the quitting of his job. Now, being the stupid, foolish young man he is…"_

"Sorry. Her words, not mine," she apologised.

I grinned. "At least my stupidity and foolishness got you to come here."

"That it did." She smiled softly. "Anyway, she said '_being the stupid and foolish young man he is, he decided to go to the extreme and literally climb a mountain for you so that you would be forced to stop and listen to him. If he's not a changed man then I don't know who is."_

"Now her words did get me thinking, but I wasn't fully convinced. You had kept up this act of ignoring me for a full three years. Who's to say that you wouldn't find a new job and start doing it again?"

She paused.

"Then, the next day Jacob came to visit me, bearing news of some sort. I don't remember; it's not important now."

Did it make me a bad person to be so happy of how nonchalantly she spoke of him?

I couldn't help myself.

I smiled a little.

"He could tell how conflicted I was and asked me what was wrong. I told him, of course, expecting him to tell me of how right I was to reject you. But no, he did the opposite. He told me I should go after you. He could see how much I love you and you, me. I let him know my worries that you'd slip back into your former habit of ignoring me, but he said that only a complete imbecile would make the same mistake twice, and a complete imbecile wouldn't climb a mountain for the girl that he loves if it meant getting her back."

"Curious, I asked why he even bothered to hang out with me in the first place. Apparently he only viewed me as a friend, and I misinterpreted his actions. He actually has a girlfriend named Vanessa."

She blushed.

I battled a grin.

"Why was he glaring at me like I killed someone?" I asked.

"He thought you weren't good enough for me, that you'd hurt me again.

"Oh."

She ignored my reaction, swiftly eluding the awkward place we'd almost gotten ourselves stuck in.

"Then I watched your video call again, as if watching it a second time would make the decision for me. I noted how desperate you were, how you were only asking for a _chance_. I decided that it wouldn't hurt if I gave you that chance. Perhaps then the old you would come back, the one who kissed me for no reason, the one who gave me silly names, the person who tended to me when I was ill, who loved me more than anything else in this world. I could see him in your eyes in that video, and it gave me hope that maybe, just maybe, you had woken up and become him again."

"I have, Bella, I have. One chance, that's all I want, and I'll prove to you that I can be that man again. So please, please take me back."

"Can't you see that I already have?" she said softly.

I smiled so widely that it made my cheeks hurt, just about bursting with happiness.

I cradled her face tenderly in my hands, staring deeply into her brown eyes, reading the forgiveness there.

And then I kissed her with everything that I felt, every bit of happiness, every jagged edge of pain, every future hope, every bit of love that I had for her.

And she kissed me back the same way, and I knew that everything was going to be more than okay, that everything was going to be perfect.

It looked like there was a brand new horizon in our world, a great new path in our journey to happiness.

And Bella and I would take it.

Together.


	2. A Charitable Heart

**A Charitable Heart**

**Challenge Number/Title: 2# An Empty Glass**  
**Date Posted: 6/2/13**

**Fandom: Twilight**  
** Rating: T**  
** Genre: AH, HEA**  
** Content Descriptors: Romance, hurt/comfort **  
** Character Pairing: Edward and Bella**

**Beta: Chandrakanta**

* * *

Warmth.

It was something of the past. Something foreign that I could only barely remember, but longed more than anything else. I remembered it being a pleasant sensation, something I reveled in and savored as best as I could whenever it decided to show up, and preferred it to the inescapable cold that was impossible to elude now. Now, there was no hope for such things.

The night was frigid, cruel in its temperament, and I had no doubt that even furred animals nearby were begging for some form of warmth, not mater how little. Unlike those animals, I didn't have the luxury of owning a warm coat, and while, despite their pleas, they would survive, one day I would surely die out here. There was no way my body could adapt to the harsh weather of the winter night; the bridge I was lying under did nothing to prevent the chill from affecting me and my thin clothes were hardly weather resistant, being designed for warmer times. I rubbed my chapped hands together, trying to create friction, but they were as cold as ice and their stiffness did no good to raise my body temperature.

I would've let myself perish long ago, given myself up completely to the unyielding winter, if the warm body curled up into mine had eluded this cruel life on the street and it was just I, fending for my life out here. But she hadn't, and I had to live for her, protect her. Without me, she would undoubtedly die, both in spirit and body. I stroked the tips of her short, inky-black hair stiffly with my fingertips, and sighed quietly.

Alice didn't deserve this.

No little girl of nine did.

Our parents would've been appalled at how I was looking after their youngest, but there wasn't much I could do. Before they'd died, they'd made me promise that I'd look after my little sister. That is, until she no longer needed my help.

She definitely still needed my help.

Not only because of our difficult life on the streets, and the need for emotional support, but also because she was sick.

Very sick.

I had no idea what she'd contracted, and it scared me to death every time she couldn't stop coughing, when she cried that her throat was burning her, when she fainted in my arms, how pale she was… There was nothing I could do but hope that she would recover.

Despite her hard life and mysterious illness, Alice was still unbelievably cheerful. She was the only flame of colour in the darkness my life had become, the only thing that made me laugh or caused me to give the slightest indication of a smile.

She was tough too, as any girl faced with the same hardships would be. She accepted whatever life threw at us, and dealt with it in an optimistic manner that astounded me. I had no idea how she did it. Sometimes she acted more maturely than me.

If we had to share our bed with the rats then she'd sigh, but then say, "At least they can't hurt us."

If we couldn't find something to eat, then she'd exclaim, "At least we're still alive. Someone will give us food soon."

If people laughed or jeered at our dirty state, she'd tell me, "They just don't understand, but one day they will. I know it! One day someone will help us."

Her belief in this fact was unrelenting.

However, only one person had been kind enough to help us in the whole time we'd been on the street – and we'd been homeless for two years.

One friendly, feminine face that we never saw again.

I would never forget her soft features, her billowy caramel-hued hair, her pitied green eyes, her amiable smile and her Southern twang.

She gave us all that was in her possession.

Ten dollars and a glass of water that she'd been about to drink.

And then she walked away, never to be seen again.

This happened over a year ago.

The ten dollars went quickly, even though we spent it as frugally as possible, and there was only enough water to quench our thirst for a week. Then we were left with nothing again – nothing but an empty glass and endless gratitude for the woman who had saved us temporarily. I never threw the glass away, I held it even now, clenched tightly in one of my dirt-encrusted hands and never let it out of my sight.

It meant more to us than the money ever had.

It reminded us that someone, somewhere, had a charitable heart.

At the beginning of this life, when our parents died and our house had been taken from us, I'd refused to even beg, too proud to admit I needed help. Ignoring the growling in the pit of my stomach wasn't difficult back then, my heart was too consumed with grief to notice a meager pain in my abdomen.

But then my hunger became too much to bear and Alice's crying – despite her maturity, she was still a child – forced me to think about the situation I was in and act accordingly. There was no getting out of it; once you were homeless, you stayed that way forever. Even if I wanted to get a job, I couldn't. I was still a minor, seventeen, incapable of getting even a part time job because of my unkempt state. So my only choice was to do something I absolutely abhorred.

I had to beg.

However, no one responded, just shot us dirty looks as they walked past.

Even Alice's innocent face, even her tears, couldn't produce people's pity.

They were all as cold as stone.

Heartless.

Couldn't they see how little Alice was? How sick she was? I didn't care too much about myself; I only wanted food for her. She needed to survive. She hadn't even lived her life yet. She had so much life ahead of her.

But it had been cruelly ripped away by death itself.

Yes, our parents weren't financially secure but they had money.

They could've looked after us.

But they were gone now.

I had to be the adult now.

Alice needed someone to depend on.

And I was that person.

Because no one would give us any food, I was forced to resort to the most immoral act on this earth, something more degrading then being forced to beg. I hated myself for doing it, but Alice had to eat.

I had to steal from people.

Since I was too cowardly to go into a shopping centre where there were security cameras galore, I just stole fruit from the front of the store and ran. Every night was a different store, every few days we were in a different suburb.

But this was our life.

Yes, everyday I prayed for a different hand to be dealt.

For now, this was it.

And, like Alice, I just had to face it head on, without complaints.

If she could do it, then I certainly could.

…

It wasn't until ten minutes after my extremely long thought process that Alice began to stir. First, she began to snuggle closer to my side, as if trying to find warmth, and then a yawn escaped her lips, and her eyes began to flutter open gradually. I smiled down at her, wanting the start of her day to be filled with the only thing I could give her.

Companionship and love.

"Bella," she murmured, her voice muffled by my shirt. "Is it morning time?"

"You can sleep a little longer if you'd like. We don't have to start moving straight away."

"Are we going to ask people for food again today?" Her brown eyes were solemn, hopeful.

She detested stealing more than I did.

She never stopped believing that someone might be generous to help us like that woman had.

"We can try, but please don't get your hopes up, all right."

"Someone will help one day. Maybe it's today," she said enthusiastically, sitting up eagerly and taking my hands in hers.

I hugged her tightly, wishing I shared her optimism. "Maybe you're right."

"Is there any more fruit?" she asked.

"A little. Just enough for you." I patted my hand blindly behind me, and smiled when I found the apricot I had stored there. I held it out to her in an offering, but she shook her head in a stubborn refusal.

"No, you eat it. There's not enough for you _and_ me."

"Which is exactly why you should eat it. You're a growing girl."

"You're hungry too," she protested.

"I'll eat later. You need to eat; I'm sure you're starving."

At my words, her hands went to her belly and indecision flickered across her face.

"Seriously, eat it." I shoved it up to her face so it brushed against her lips. "See, now your germs are on it so you have to eat it."

"Bella!" she whined. "I wanted you to eat it."

"Well, now it's yours. Now eat."

"Okay," she conceded sulkily.

I repressed a smile.

Alice liked to think that she was doing something for me too. Her way of doing so was by offering me some of her food when she noticed that I'd had the minimum amount.

I knew we couldn't live on fruit forever but it was the only plan I had… for now.

It gave me a little satisfaction, watching her bite into the flesh of the fruit, knowing that she wouldn't go hungry for a few hours. Despite my own grumbling stomach, I was content.

It took her a little under two minutes, but soon she'd finished the apricot and thrown away the seed.

"Not going to eat it?" I teased, pointing to the discarded seed.

She poked her tongue out at me. "No."

When she'd first tried an apricot, on one of our first weeks on the street, she'd started to bite into the seed, thinking it was edible. I remember smiling for the first time since being placed in this awful situation and telling her gently that the seed was meant to be thrown away.

"_But I'm hungry," she protested. _

"_It won't make you any less hungry."_

"_Why not?" she demanded._

_I shrugged. "I don't know. It just won't."_

"_I'm going to eat it anyway, I'm hungry."_

"_Don't!" _

_I had no idea what would happen if she ate the seed, but I didn't want to find out. _

_She began to choke it up immediately after swallowing it, and spat it out onto the dirty ground. "It's too big."_

_I couldn't stop myself; I began to laugh uncontrollably, slapping my hand against my knee lightly in amusement and bowing my head so she couldn't see my expression. _

_She simply glared at me, her face flushed. _

_And I'd never let her forget it since then._

_You needed a little bit of humor when you had such a bleak life. _

"Can we go now? I don't want to sit down any more, the ground hurts."

Alice was very energetic, and even weak from lack of nutritious food, she still loved to run around and explore the world. That was the only thing she liked about being homeless, the unpredictability.

At least that's what she told me.

I could see where she was coming from.

But I didn't agree with it.

There was nothing I wanted more than a house to call my own and to be the bearer of hopes and dreams that could actually come true.

But some things would never be.

"Are you sure?"

"Yep, let's go!" She jumped to her feet, pulling me up with her. I stumbled like a drunkard for a second, before pulling her up into my arms and walking her over the rocky terrain. My bare feet were used to the harsh nature of the ground, but I never let her be forced to face the same devils as I had to, by carrying her. She had to conquer the hill all on her own though; I wasn't strong enough to carry her uphill.

As I was going to be carrying her most of the way, Alice took her turn holding the empty glass. She knew the importance of it to me, and guarded it like a mother lion would with her cub.

"Where are we going now?" Alice asked, as we walked up the steep hill.

"Somewhere west, to the next town. The people here know us too well."

"What's it called?"

"I don't know yet. We'll know soon."

She nodded. "Okay."

It didn't take us long to get to the top of the hill, and, when we did, I was disgruntled to see that there was nothing ahead but a busy highway and a few stray buildings, vacant of any people.

Ah well, like Alice would say, it was better than nothing.

I pulled her fragile body into my arms again and began to trudge forward. I had no idea where to, just straight ahead.

I continued on this directionless pursuit forwards until my arms grew weary and we had to rest for a little bit behind the cover of the trees.

It wasn't long before we were walking again.

It wasn't only Alice who had been toughened up by our situation.

For the remainder of our walk, Alice insisted to walk beside me like a 'big girl.' I reminded her that it would hurt her feet, but she insisted still, holding my hand as we ambled down the side of the road. Only twice did she have a coughing fit, and they didn't last as long as they usually did.

Perhaps she was getting better.

I'd been homeless for far too long to hope that someone would stop their car and offer us their services. Such a thing was a fantasy. People were too busy and full of prejudice to stop in the middle of a highway to help two kids.

However, I_ was_ hoping someone would be kind enough when we begged later on in the street in the town we were heading for, for someone to give us the littlest of change. It was a vain hope, but I hoped for Alice's sake. If I lost all hope then so would she.

I wouldn't dare take that away from her.

Acting her age for once, Alice continued to ask how much longer it would be until we got there, every ten minutes. However, instead of getting irritated by her repetition, I was actually quite pleased by it. She deserved to be a kid once in a while.

Finally, after about five rest stops and half a day of walking, we arrived at our destination. The area was very secluded, with an endless amount of pine trees and there were no cars in sight, the grey road we walked on desolate and lonely. I only knew that we'd arrived by seeing a newly painted sign that exclaimed where we were. I pointed at the sign that stood a few yards away from us, and bent over, exhaling deeply as I tried to catch my breath.

Alice began to giggle at once.

"Forks? Why would they name the town after something you eat with?"

I stood upright at once and burst into laughter with her when I saw what she was going on about, hugging her small form from behind.

"Well this is where we're going to be for a bit. Is that okay?"

"Yep, I just think the name is weird."

"It is pretty silly," I admitted. "But it's going to be our home for a few days."

Alice smiled brightly. "As long as we're somewhere."

…

Forks looked to be a small town with more pine trees than people, which was what I was hoping for. It would be a convenience to us in many ways. It took us a while to reach the place where all the shops were located but when we did, we didn't have to look any further. This was the perfect place for what we needed to do.

We found a good place to beg for money or food in front of a fancy-looking café. People tended to have loose change when they went in an out of coffee shops, so this was our best bet for finding someone who might spare us some.

However, like everywhere else we'd been, the customers eyed us with blatant disgust as they exited the shop, or otherwise ignored us. The other people who passed us on the street were no different.

It seemed like small-town people – people generally of low-income – were as equally cruel-hearted as city people.

We didn't give up, though; there was still time.

We begged for over four hours, sitting hunched over on the edge of the pavement and holding out the empty glass for people to tip money into, but by the end of those four hours, the glass was still empty, and so were the hope in our hearts.

"Why can't they just give us a little? They have so much," Alice asked, clambering onto my lap and fixating her glistening eyes on mine.

"Remember what you told me? One day they'll understand. It's just taking longer than we expected."

"You're right. We should keep trying. Mummy always said to never give up."

"That's right," I told her, faking a smile to cover up the sadness that stirred within me when I thought about our mother.

"So let's keep asking people."

"It's seven o'clock. The store is going to close soon, so we might have to try again tomorrow."

"There could still be someone," she said determinedly, wiping her tears away with her thin, little fingers and grabbing my hands.

"We might have to try the next…"

I trailed off when I felt something tap my shoulder. The only person who did that was Alice, and she was right in front of me, staring at whatever was behind me in surprise. Her surprise then quickly turned into delight. I stood up at once and whirled around to see the most shocking thing ever.

Whatever I expected…it was not what awaited me.

It was a young man.

A devastatingly attractive, young man.

He was tall – overwhelming so – quite pale, with a chiseled jaw and tousled hair of a strange bronze hue that I couldn't stop staring at.

That was until I met his eyes.

Hell, his eyes…I doubt there were any other, more stunning in the world than his. The hue of them was an intense emerald green, a colour so compelling, so beautiful, that I had to stop myself from taking a precarious step closer to this stranger.

His look was polished, his clothes were without a stain or tear and he looked to be the epitome of cleanliness.

Why would such an angel want to speak to me, the definition of decay?

His alluring green eyes surveyed Alice and I with what I believed to be compassion and his lips quirked up into a crooked smile of greeting.

"Hello."

Hell, even his talk was refined, yet he looked to be around my age.

Alice spoke before I did.

"Are you here to help us?" she asked brightly.

"Alice," I hissed.

He would probably walk away now, thoroughly freaked out.

Like I expected, his smile faltered.

However, he didn't walk away.

His ears simply turned a faint pink.

"If I can," he admitted.

I tried to contain the explosion of hope that burst within me at his words. Alice, however, was very open with hers and smiled more widely than I had ever seen her smile before.

"See, Bella, see, I told you, I told you," she tugged at my arm excitedly, jumping to her feet.

"I'm sorry," I told him, my cheeks burning a violent crimson.

"No, no. She's very cute."

"I am not cute!" Alice put her hands on her hips and jutted her bottom lip out as she stared up at him.

"Well what's your name?" he asked her, kneeling down on the filthy pathway as if it were nothing.

"Alice. And this is my big sister Bella," she introduced us proudly, grabbing my hand and waving it up in the air. "What's your name?"

"Edward. Nice to meet you, Alice." He held out his hand to her, and she shook it profusely, smiling all the way.

I had no idea why he was still here.

Why on earth would someone just randomly stop to talk to a girl he'd never met, and a little kid, both who looked like they hadn't seen a bath in months? Perhaps this was the miracle we'd been praying for. Perhaps he really was an angel from heaven. It seemed more likely than the obvious.

Then he turned to me and held his hand out.

Not wanting to make a fool out of myself, I took it.

What I wasn't expecting was how it would make me feel when our hands met.

His hands were warm, welcoming, and more than that, I could swear that an electric current ran through us when we touched. I knew he felt it too when I heard him gasp a little under his breath.

I'd heard about this before.

My old friends used to giggle about wanting to experience it one day.

It featured a lot in the movies.

And my parents used to tell me stories about people who had felt it.

An electric current usually had to do with attraction.

How could Edward be attracted to someone as lowly and simple looking as me? I hadn't changed out of the jeans and the black t-shirt I had been wearing for months. My brown hair was wispy and dull, and my body was dirty and unwanted.

The idea was ludicrous.

I couldn't even believe I'd considered it.

It had to be something else.

Anything else was more plausible.

I was brought back to the present when I felt his hand slowly tug back. I let go of it, mortified.

How long had we been shaking hands?

I looked down, unable to face him.

He looked down too, obviously as embarrassed as I was – if that were even possible.

Alice broke the silence as only she could.

"So are you going to help us?"

He smiled and looked up, as if only just remembering his purpose.

"I wanted to give you this; it's all I have on me. I wish I could give you more. You look like you need it."

I openly gaped at him; my eyes must be deceiving me.

There was no way in hell that he could be holding out a one hundred dollar bill for me to take.

Who even carried around that much money?

He had to be filthy rich.

But he didn't have the behavior of a rich boy.

He was too…nice.

Perhaps I was wrong.

"Really? All of it?"

"All of it."

He stuffed it roughly into the empty glass, before I could think to say anything more.

"Thank you; this is more than I can possibly ever want. You have no idea how much we appreciate this," I told him fervently, tears forming in the corner of my eyes at his generosity.

I didn't care how pathetic my crying made me look.

All of my dreams had just come true.

"Is that ours now? Really ours?" Alice asked, her voice wonderstruck as if someone had just told her that she was about to meet the queen.

"Yes, yes, I think it is," I told her, my voice breaking at the end.

"I know you'll use it well. Better than I ever would," he offered.

I smiled genuinely at him. "Really, thank you."

"Thank you, thank you, thank you," Alice chanted, jumping up and down on the spot, too excited to stay still.

He nodded with a smile, and was about to turn away when the incredibly loud sound of my stomach grumbling made him twist back around.

I flushed in my chagrin, and looked down again.

When I finally looked up, I noticed that he was eying me thoughtfully, searching my face for something I wasn't sure he'd find. He'd helped us so much in ways he probably didn't realize, which was why I didn't snap him out of his staring. I owed him everything. He could stare all he liked.

Indecision crossed over his features, and he cocked his head, as if unsure of something.

Then he got his act together, and sighed.

"You know what, fuck it; I'm going to take you guys to dinner. I'm sure you haven't had any."

"Really?" Alice squealed, tugging now on Edward's jacket. I tried to pull her back but she wouldn't budge.

"I wouldn't want to impose," I told him.

"You wouldn't be," he insisted.

"Why are you doing this?"

He smiled tentatively. "I'll explain if you and Alice go with me to dinner."

Why was he staring at me with such familiarity?

I'd never seen anyone like him.

Then again, there _was _something familiar about him too, but I couldn't put my finger on it.

It didn't matter in any case.

We were going to eat the first proper meal we'd had in longer than I could fathom.

A miracle had finally arrived!

…

"So where would you like to eat?" Edward asked Alice kindly as we walked side by side down one of the many streets of Forks. The town in itself was actually quite quaint and seemed much more pleasant than it had when we'd been groveling on its grounds.

Her massive grin grew even bigger at this, but her eyes danced with indecision.

I smiled gratefully at him.

It was beyond amazing to see her this happy.

He winked back at me.

I blushed.

The saying, "butterflies in my stomach" was very inaccurate; it felt more like a dozen eagles were nesting in there.

Again with the familiarity!

The mystery of it all was beginning to irritate me.

But my gratitude overtook that feeling for sure.

My attention reverted back to Alice just in time to hear her answer to Edward's question.

"Oh…um…the place with the big yellow thing. Where you get a toy."

"Oh, do you mean _McDonald's_?"

"Yeah, that's what she means," I answered for her, knowing she wouldn't remember the name of it. It'd been so long since we'd been there. My smile faltered a little when I thought of the fact that a nine year old didn't know the name of _McDonald's_. If we ever got off the streets then I was going to take her everywhere.

Disneyland, the cinema, to the zoo…

There were so many places she hadn't been yet.

I knew it was stupid of me to even think of a future like that when it was so out of my grasp.

I couldn't help myself, however.

"Sure, it wasn't what I had in mind, but that sounds like a great idea," he praised her.

Alice giggled with delight.

"How far away is it?" she asked.

"Only around the corner."

"Yay!" She clapped her hands together, dropped my hand and ran ahead of us as to reach our destination more quickly.

Now it was just Edward and I.

The distance between us couldn't have been further apart, and I was surprised when he edged closer to me as we walked.

It was as if he wanted to be near me.

Wishful thinking was really getting the better of me.

"You have no idea how much this means to me, and to her," I told him again, staring at Alice's moving form in front of us.

"Really, there is no problem."

"I still don't understand…" I trailed off.

"You will when I explain it to you. It's a long story."

"Do you know someone who used to be a homeless person or something?"

His eyes shifted from side to side uncomfortably. "Not exactly."

"It's okay," I assured him. "You don't even have to tell me. I owe you, not the other way around."

"No, you need to know," he disagreed, his green eyes softening a little. "I'll tell you after you've eaten."

"Deal."

Our conversation was forced to come to a halt, as we'd reached the fast food place, and Alice had rejoined us and was now tugging on my arm.

"Do we really get to go in there?" she asked, her eyes wider than I'd ever seen them.

Edward and I both laughed simultaneously. "Yes."

I felt very self-conscious as I walked into the crowded fast food store, not for a second forgetting the ratty clothes I donned and my unkempt state. Edward, however, seemed at ease to be walking beside Alice and I, and didn't seem to notice the disgusted glares people were sending Alice and I. Few were of pity. But, for once, I didn't mind; we were about to eat bought, cooked food. My pride wasn't even getting in the way due to how hungry I was, and that was saying something.

Edward asked Alice and I what we wanted and then went over to the short queue to order it, while we sat at a vacant table by the wall – I wasn't sure if it was a conscious decision or not, to avoid the table by the window, but, either way, we did. Alice set the glass down gently on the table and I retrieved the money from it, putting it in the safer place of my jeans pocket.

"I like him, he's nice. Do you like him?" Alice said loudly, oblivious to the people staring openly at us.

I blushed.

My voice was as quiet as a whisper, and I was sure Alice could only barely hear my words.

"Yes, but you need to remember to be very polite."

"I _am_ polite."

"Well, more polite then."

"Okay," she said brightly.

It wasn't long before Edward came back with our meals, and, by then, I had thankfully lost the embarrassing colouring in my cheeks.

He handed Alice and I a burger each and dug into his straight away. I held mine fervently in my hands as if I was holding the lost riches of Arabia; I wanted to savor the moment as best as I could.

I didn't realize how sincere two words could really be until I said them in that way. "Thank you."

He smiled shyly. "My pleasure."

I didn't know which of his smiles I liked more.

Although I did have a soft spot in my heart for the crooked one he'd given me earlier.

Hell, what was I saying?

It sounded like I had a damn crush on him.

Not happening.

I did _not _have a crush on him.

Hell to the no.

I reverted my attention back to my food, trying to escape my scary thought process.

Yes, how could I forget about my glorious food?

I unwrapped it carefully, slowly, as I was unable to believe that the moment had finally arrived where I was about to eat something other than fruit.

One look at the delicious burger, and my resolve to eat it was gone.

I tore into that motherfucker of a cheeseburger and ate all of it in a matter of thirty seconds.

Once it was down, I was horrified.

How deranged I must have looked.

I looked at Edward from the corner of my eye, terrified to see his reaction.

He looked…amused.

It seemed like I was safe.

My blush couldn't be contained, however, and I thoughtlessly covered it with my hands, groaning at the heat I found there.

How freaking embarrassing.

Even Alice hadn't finished hers yet, and she was a child.

"So…uh…was it nice?" Edward asked me awkwardly after a minute, trying to banish my obvious chagrin.

"Yeah, very." I sunk further into my chair, as if doing so would make me disappear.

Alice saved the day by pointing out the window on the other side of the room, and exclaiming about how pretty the yellow hummingbird outside was. All attention was off me, phew.

But then, like she'd drawn it off me, Alice drew it back to me again.

It looked like I couldn't escape attention for long.

"We used to have one like that in our old house."

Oh shit.

Now he was going to ask me about our past.

Shit, shit, shit!

But, to my surprise, he didn't. It was as if he noticed how uncomfortable the topic made me and decided to spare me the discomfort it would've brought me.

Instead, he instigated the topic I was most curious about.

Whoever was up there was sure favoring me today.

"I'm guessing you want to know why I've done this. I guess I can't put it off any more."

"Yeah, not many people stop to talk to random… homeless people, and then give them dinner," I murmured, stuttering a little over the word 'homeless.' It made us sound so pitiful, about as worthy as a piece of stray gum on the sidewalk.

Perhaps I was.

He shook his head. "You're not just some random girl."

Not random?

What the hell was he on about?

We'd never met before.

At least I was sure we hadn't.

Was I mistaken?

"What do you mean?"

"You obviously don't remember me, but I remember you. You're Bella Swan."

Flabbergasted was too light a word to describe how my face looked when he said my full name.

"Yeah, I am. Where do you know me from?" I asked, my eyebrows rising in shock.

His expression grew sheepish. "I used to live in Arizona before I lived here in Forks. We were classmates up until you and your family decided to move to Seattle."

"I moved from Arizona when I was eight…we…I…we mustn't have been close if I can't remember you."

"We weren't," he admitted. "I guess you just stuck out to me because you were the only other person that moved beside me."

He looked down as he said this, and I had the distinct impression that he was lying.

I had no idea why he would lie about how he remembered me.

What was there to lie about?

The thought was pushed aside the second he continued talking.

"Then today, I was on my way home from work and I saw you and Alice sitting on the side of the road. I recognized _you_ instantly, don't ask me how, I don't know myself, but I didn't know who you were with. I guessed that she was a sister or a cousin or something.

"I noticed what you were er…doing and it was obvious you two needed help, so I gave it to you the best I could. Leaving someone I knew, hell, leaving anyone, to basically starve to death, would've been beyond cruel, and I'm so glad I stopped to help."

As he spoke, an image came to mind, one that had to have been buried there for years.

It was of a little boy with reddish-brown hair and green eyes, sitting adjacent to me at a small wooden desk in a vividly decorated classroom. One of his front teeth was missing and he was flashing an adorable lopsided smile at me. He asked to play checkers with me but I didn't know how to play, so he taught me, and we played right until the bell rang. We never spoke after that, however, because I moved the following week.

I knew this had to be Edward.

How I could've forgotten him, but remembered some of my other classmates, I had no idea.

"I…I remember you now. Your last name started with a C."

He grinned. "Yeah, it's Cullen."

"Edward Cullen," I whispered.

"That's right."

Alice – who had been miraculously quiet the entire time – decided to bring the attention back to her, by talking over the both of us.

"I only went to kindergarten, year one and year two. Bella taught me everything else," she said proudly.

Edward's mouth parted a little in shock. "Whoa, how long have you guys been living on…out here?"

"You mean on the street?" I said bluntly. "Two years."

"Our mommy and daddy got sick and they're in heaven now, so they can't pay the bills, so we have to live out here."

Alice's voice trembled a little when she mentioned our parents but she was otherwise okay. In the beginning, however, it would've been a different story.

I shrugged. "It's no big deal. There are plenty of people like us."

"I wish there was more that I could do. I truly do. But money is all I can give you. I swear to you though, if I was in charge of a store, I would give you a job, Bella, but I'm not so I can't," he replied regretfully.

"It's okay. You've done more than we've ever hoped for."

There were a few minutes of silence before I spoke again.

"So, you know how shit my life went. How has yours been?"

"Pretty good, I guess. Not many people ask me that question so I haven't really thought it through."

"Have you got any aspirations? Has anything special or interesting happened to you?"

"Not really, I'm just like everyone else."

"Do you know what you want to do when you're done with school?"

I had no idea where these questions were coming from.

It was as if I were trying to unconsciously buy time.

"Well, I'd like to follow my father's footsteps and become a doctor," he answered confidently.

"Wow, that's great."

He had no idea how lucky he was to be able to do whatever he chose. My life was pretty much over already, while his had only just begun.

I envied him for that.

He looked at his watch and groaned. "I'm so sorry but I have to go now. My parents are expecting me."

"Whaaaaaaat?" Alice wailed. "I want Edward to come with us. I like him. Can't he come live with us?"

"Alice, that's not how it works," I told her gently.

"But I like him." She stamped her foot under the table stubbornly.

"So do I, but he has his own family to go to."

"Can't they live with us too?"

I had no idea how to respond to that one.

Edward, however, saved the day.

"We'll see each other again, don't worry," he assured her.

I frowned at the promise that he probably couldn't keep.

"Are you sure? Do you promise?" she asked, focusing her big brown eyes on his.

"Yes."

"When?" she demanded, her brow furrowing in thought.

"I don't know when, I just know that we will."

His answer seemed to satisfy her. "Okay!"

He stood up hesitantly as if he was reluctant to leave us.

"Well, I guess this is it then," he murmured.

"Yeah."

I stood up also.

"Er…goodbye?" he said awkwardly.

"Goodbye."

I didn't know what else to say.

We both stood there in complete silence for a minute, unsure of how to proceed, and then, with no apparent trigger, he turned to leave.

It scared me that I had to suppress the sudden urge to pull him back and make him stay with us.

Surprising us both, Alice hopped up out of her seat and ran over to Edward, hugging him tightly around his middle. He turned around and hugged her back, ruffling her black hair.

"Thank you," I told him again.

He said nothing, instead smiled crookedly at me, stepped back and then finally walked away. I stared after him wistfully; I couldn't deny that I wished I could follow him.

But some things could never be.

He and I lived in two different worlds now.

Like the woman who had helped us two years ago, his would be a face that we'd never see again, but his face would also never be forgotten.

Sometimes I really wanted to kick life hard in the ass.

I grabbed the glass from where it stood innocently on the table and took Alice's tiny hand in mine.

This was our life.

There was no changing that now.

…

We found a suitable place to sleep behind the shelter of the vast number of pine trees that bordered the small town. It wasn't as comfortable as the last place we'd slept but the towering trees around us were oddly comforting and I felt protected under their cover. At first it was difficult to find a spot to lie down upon – because twigs and rocks dominated most of the forest floor – but eventually we found a small clearing, undeniably perfect for our needs. Even though there was plenty of space for Alice to lie down far away from me, she still snuggled into my side and rested her head on my chest as if she were afraid of the creatures of the night who kept us awake. The air wasn't as bitterly cold as yesterday, but it still ate away at my bones.

I hoped it wasn't affecting Alice as badly as it was for me.

Staring up at the stars, visible despite the ridiculous amount of trees, I began to ponder over how I would spend the money Edward had given me. There were so many things we needed, and a hundred dollars would go a long way to get those things. However, I needed to remember that it wouldn't last forever, and spending it frugally was vital to our survival.

Food was a must have; I'd definitely be spending most of the money on that. New clothes would be nice, but the cost of them would chew away most of our newly acquired funds. Perhaps if I bought new clothes though, someone would finally consider hiring me.

It'd be a big risk but was worth considering.

Or I could use it to pay for a visit to the doctor so he could check up on Alice and give her a diagnosis.

But again, that would be quite expensive.

But Alice's health was more important that anything else.

So, if it came to that, I would use the money for that visit in a heartbeat.

So many possibilities, so many things I could purchase.

My head was spinning from the mere thought of it.

And it was all thanks to Edward.

Speaking of him, I couldn't quite banish him from my thoughts.

Even if he hadn't saved our lives, I didn't doubt that his handsome face would still have cropped up regularly in my thoughts.

I needed to stop thinking of him.

I would never see those green eyes ever again.

The thought of that sent a lump in my throat and caused my eyes to sting.

Why did he cause such a big reaction within me?

Was I that deprived of the male species that I latched onto the first one that showed the littlest bit of attention towards me?

Was I that sad?

It appeared so.

His face seemed to be permanently stuck in my mind.

Hell, I should be planning to leave the second light touched Forks and Alice woke up.

And I would, if the other half of me wasn't screaming for me to stay one more day here.

The side that screamed those words was that side that longed for green eyes and bronze hair, and was the side that couldn't seem to let him go.

Part of me was scared to remain in the town, should he see me again.

Part of me was afraid that if he saw me again, his compassion would turn into disgust and, like everybody else, he would shun us.

Part of me was frightened of rejection.

But a bigger part of me couldn't wait to see him again.

So I decided to stay another day.

And let fate decide whether we should cross paths again.

…

Much like the previous night, I woke long before Alice did, having been unsettled by strange dreams of the man who had recently upturned my world. In my dreams, he did nothing, just stood there as silently as a mime and held out his hand for me to take, his expression passive. However, I was physically bound, my hands tied together with rope, and could not reach out to him. Looking at him was all I could do.

When I awoke, I tried to shake off all thoughts of him, but, like last night, they were stuck in my mind with a substance stronger than glue.

I didn't even realize Alice had awoken until I felt her cold hand upon my face and her sweet voice, riddled with sleep.

"What are you thinking about?"

"Nothing." I dismissed her question quickly. She was too young to know of what plagued my thoughts. "Just of what to do today."

"So we're staying here for another day?" she asked hopefully.

"I think so."

"Yay! We might see Edward again today."

My heart stuttered a little at the sound of his name and I fought to hide a smile.

"Maybe, but we're going to try and buy some things."

Her face lit up. "Like what?"

"Food, clothes. We'll see what we can find."

"Yes! I'm super hungry."

"Well good, because we've got to start walking soon."

"Now, now, now." She pushed away from me and stood up, pulling at my arm again.

"But you only just woke up."

"I don't care. I hate sleep anyway. I want to see you buy things."

I chuckled.

Alice was unique; I had to give her that.

I was very lucky that I'd had an hour to reflect to myself otherwise I probably would have been forced to get active when my head was still foggy from sleep, and grumbled invariably to no end.

"All right. Fine. But tomorrow we should wait for a bit before we start walking."

"Okay. Let's go now!"

As routine went, I dusted myself off, picked up the glass, handed it to Alice and then scooped her up in my arms. We wouldn't have to walk very far today; the main cluster of shops were only half an hour's walk at the most.

I had no idea what time it was but I hoped it was a decent hour and the shops would be open. I didn't feel like waiting outside one of the stores for an hour and tolerating the looks we would get as people walked by or drove past.

As it had been yesterday, luck seemed to be on my side today. When we arrived at the place where we'd been aiming for, I noticed that the majority of the shops had their doors wide open and the street was teeming with people. I put Alice down gently and took her hand, squeezing it lightly.

"Where do you want to go first?"

"Food!" she exclaimed.

"That does sound like a good idea," I admitted. "What sort of food?"

She dropped my hand and tilted her head. "Er…Uh…Um…"

"Why don't we go see what there is."

"Okay."

Alice was easy to please.

I led her to a decent-sized bakery at the corner of the street and gestured to it in question. I continued ahead when she nodded eagerly in approval.

The shop was warmer than outside, but still couldn't be considered as _warm_. My thoughts on the temperature quickly faded away, however, when I saw what the store had to offer.

I seemed to grow ten times hungrier than I was two seconds ago when I feasted my eyes on the mouthwatering array of breads and cakes in front of me. There was so much to choose from, and I felt a bit overwhelmed by it all. Alice pointed immediately to one of the brightly decorated cupcakes sitting directly at the front of the glass display and although I'd do anything to make her smile, I was a little hesitant over whether or not I should buy it. Bread would definitely be more substantial, but she hadn't had anything truly sugary in weeks. If anyone deserved a treat then it would definitely be her. She pointed at it again, pouting at it adorably.

Ah, screw it; we had plenty of money to buy substantial food later.

"Two cupcakes please," I asked the serving lady, smiling at her politely.

Her return smile was one of warmth, but it quickly faded when she saw the amount of money in my hand. She groaned quietly under her breath and her eyes narrowed with suspicion.

It wasn't difficult to guess what she thought.

But I was beyond caring about that right now.

She gave me the appropriate change and I almost gasped aloud at how many bills I now held in my grasp. I knew one hundred dollars was a lot of money – well it was for me anyway – but it seemed like a lot more when it was divided into twenty dollar bills.

We both walked out of the bakery with a smile on our faces, and I knew that nothing could perturb our blissful mood. Our life was at its peak today.

Sensing Alice's impatience, and failing to see a place where we could sit, I sat on the edge of the curb and handed her the brown paper bag with the cupcakes in it when she followed suit. I laughed at the way her eyes widened with delight when she retrieved her cupcake from the bag and lifted it up to her eye level. Like other little kids usually did, she began to lick the icing off the cupcake, and made a quiet appreciative sound.

I grinned and took the glass off her so she could eat with both hands, and then balanced it on my lap so I could eat my own cupcake.

"Is it nice?" I asked her.

"Mhmmm."

I took that as a yes.

Staring dreamily at the sky, I almost didn't notice Alice's figure freeze in my periphery.

Despite that, I knew immediately that something was terribly wrong when the cupcake fell from Alice's suddenly shaking hands, and she began to cough violently, clutching her throat.

"I can't…breathe," she wheezed, her face turning a disturbing shade of red.

I could tell this was different from the other attacks she'd had when her eyes rolled back into her head and she fell back into my surprised arms.

She'd never fallen unconscious after having trouble with breathing.

I couldn't hear her breathing.

I wasn't a doctor but I knew this attack could be fatal if I didn't do something.

"Help!" I screamed, shaking Alice in a means to revive her. "She's not breathing."

But just like when we'd begged the previous day, people just walked past as if they hadn't seen us.

"Please. She's just a child!" I began to sob.

An inferno of anger swept up inside of me as I thought of all the people who were too busy to help a dying child.

"Please. Just please help her!"

I was disorientated.

The world was on a tilt.

Screams filled my ears.

I felt like I was about to faint from the stress of it all. Only Alice's limp body kept me grounded. I cried out her name, and shook her again.

Then suddenly, he was there, kneeling beside us and checking her pulse.

Edward.

Even with my eyes blurred with tears, I still knew it was him.

"I can take her to my father."

I nodded, too traumatized to even contemplate what he was saying. All I knew was that he was here to help.

He picked Alice up as if she weighed nothing and cradled her in his arms. I stood up, grabbed the glass, took her feeble hand in mine and followed Edward's determined stride. He was difficult to keep up with but I managed, knowing that Alice needed urgent medical attention.

"How long has she been like this?" he asked me, not looking away from where he was headed.

"For about a minute before you came."

"She's going to be all right, Bella. I promise," he said softly.

"Okay," I whispered.

It seemed to take forever and a day to reach wherever Edward was headed, and each step I took was more painful than the last, as I was tortured with the knowledge that each passing second might be Alice's final one.

Then, finally, we were there.

If this were another day, I might've just stood and marveled at the classic exterior of the house we were rushing into, but right now everything was a blur and time was crucial.

"Dad! Where are you?" Edward called out urgently as we navigated through the many rooms.

Finally, we came to a living room of sorts and barreled right into the very person we were searching for.

I knew he was Edward's father due to his pallor and green eyes.

His blonde hair and his height, however, were not alike.

"What's this?" The man asked immediately, staring at Alice in utter shock. I didn't think he'd even noticed me yet; he soon would.

"You need to help her, I don't know what's wrong with her but she's not breathing," Edward explained, his hands shaking as he placed Alice gently upon a leather sofa in the room.

"Of course. Move back, Edward," he instructed, walking over to where Alice lay. With the confidence and calm manner only a man of his profession could have in the current situation, he cradled her head with one of his hands and tilted her head up with the other before blowing a big burst of air into her mouth. He repeated this process repetitively, checking her pulse every ten breaths.

I hadn't realized Edward had taken my hand until he squeezed it tightly.

With that one squeeze he made me believe that maybe everything would turn out all right.

My panic settled a little, and now there was only a fierce feeling of anxiety in its place.

I leant into his side and prayed with all of my soul that Alice would be all right.

Finally, I heard a violent cough and Edward's father stepped back.

"Bella?" I heard Alice call out weakly.

My heart swelled with hope.

Was she really going to be all right?

There was only one way to find out.

I rushed over to her, barely registering the fact that Edward's hand was still grasped tightly in mine, and almost laughed with relief when I saw her doe-like eyes staring up at me.

"You're going to be fine. Everything's okay now." I kissed her forehead, tears of relief slipping down my cheeks.

I then turned to the man who had saved her.

"Thank you so much. I owe you everything for saving her."

"I couldn't just let her die when I have the power to revive her," he said modestly.

"That doesn't diminish my gratitude. Thank you."

"It's perfectly all right. Now would you like to explain to me who you are? Edward never told me he had a girlfriend."

I blushed and was quick to correct him, but Edward got there first. "She's just a friend, Dad."

"That's what they all say," he muttered.

If it were possible, Edward's ears went pinker than my cheeks.

"I'm Bella and this is my sister, Alice." I cocked my head in her direction.

"Speaking of which, she needs to go to the hospital and get a check up. Do you have any idea what triggered the illness?"

"She's been sick for a while, but she's never stopped breathing like this. She ate something just before it happened."

He nodded. "Could be an allergic reaction."

I shook my head. "I doubt it. She's had a cupcake before."

"How long has she been sick for?"

"Around a year."

"How could your parents be so negligent as to not take her to the doctors? It's obvious she needs one badly. I'd like to speak to them if you don't mind, and recommend for them to make an appointment with me."

The panic must've shown on my face because his voice was kinder as he spoke.

"Don't worry, you're not in trouble. You and Edward did the right thing coming to me."

"That's not it." I fidgeted with the zipper on my jacket.

"They need to know."

I had no idea what to say and how to say it. Only Edward's hand in mine kept me steady. I was surprised his father hadn't guessed what my issues were already by the state of my clothing. Eventually I found the words, but they came out more bitter than I expected.

"My parents passed away a few years ago, so there's no way you can contact them."

His expression quickly morphed into one of pity.

"I'm so sorry. Do you have a guardian I can contact then?"

"It's just me and Alice," I answered meekly.

"Where have you been living then?"

"Dad, they've been on the street," Edward finally said when I failed to answer him.

There was a moment of absolute silence before anybody spoke. I braced myself for the disgust I would surely hear, the malice his voice would bear when he told us to get the hell out of his house.

But it never came.

Instead, he frowned, and pity not only touched his eyes, but the rest of his features as well.

"Well, I need to take this little one to the hospital immediately then. She could've contracted anything out there. You should probably get checked out too, but for now we'll just worry about her."

"You're not going to kick us out?" I whispered.

His eyes widened. "Of course not. I doubt the situation you're in is due to sinful actions on your part. Life just hasn't been kind to you."

"Can they stay with us for the time being?" Edward asked him hopefully, glancing momentarily at me. "You can't just put them back on the street, Dad."

"I know, but I need to talk to your mother first."

"Fair enough," he agreed. "But please think about it."

"Before we can discuss that, however, I need to take this little girl to the hospital. By the time I return, your mother should be home. Don't worry; I'll give her a heads up on the situation before she comes home, so she won't be taken by surprise. Your friend can stay with you until we get back."

"But shouldn't I go with Alice?" I asked him.

I didn't want to leave Edward, but I didn't want Alice to face the unknown on her own either.

"It'd be easier if you just stay here with Edward," he told me. "We'll be back before you even realize we're gone. As a certified doctor, I can tell you that she absolutely needs to see a doctor, as soon as possible, and I don't have the proper equipment here."

"Okay," I conceded with a sigh. "Thank you so much for doing this."

"She needs medical attention," he said seriously. "And it would be wrong of me not to give it to her."

I smiled at him in gratitude and then kissed Alice's cheek.

"You're going to need to go with this man for a little bit, okay. He's going to make you better now. I'll be right here when you get back," I told her.

"Okay. He's Edward's daddy so he must be nice."

We all chortled when we heard that.

"I see you've made a great impression on her," Edward's father said, raising an eyebrow.

"I'll explain everything later," Edward promised.

"I'm going to hold you to that, son."

He then walked over to Alice and held out a hand for her to take. She sat up slowly, and then took it, smiling brightly at him.

"Thank you for saving me."

He chuckled. "You're welcome."

Alice got off the couch and looked at us all, unsure of where to go in her unfamiliar surroundings.

"I'll see you two a little later," Edward's father told Edward and I with a wave of his hand.

"Bye." Alice waved at us wildly, before following Edward's father out of the room.

And then it was just Edward and I.

Alone.

Fate was certainly trying to push us together.

I had no idea why though.

I just knew that he was my savior.

And that I maybe…sort of…kind of liked him.

Okay, I did like him.

But I was way out of my league.

Not that it mattered anyway.

Soon Alice and I would be on the street again.

And I'd never see him again.

I tried to ignore the pain that surfaced at the thought of never talking to him ever again, of never looking into his green eyes.

But it was impossible to quench.

Seeing him again only seemed to intensify that pain.

But I knew that separation was inevitable.

It didn't hurt any less though.

When I turned to face Edward, I couldn't quite read his expression. He seemed at ease, but I knew he was deep in thought.

Since he wasn't paying attention, I took this opportunity to look at him again. Staring at him was something I would never tire of doing. He was the most attractive man I'd ever met. I couldn't help myself.

But then he spoke, bringing me out of my stupor. I looked away quickly, hoping that he hadn't noticed my infatuation with him.

"She's going to be all right; Alice, I mean."

"I know," I murmured. "We're just so lucky that you were there. I still haven't thanked you for that, so thank you."

"You don't need to thank me. Any decent person would've acted as I did."

"Yet only you did."

"I guess you're right," he admitted.

"Why do you keep doing this though? Looking out for us. You even asked your dad if we could stay here. That's so much more than you need to do. Don't get me wrong, I'm very grateful, but I don't understand why you're being so nice to us."

I stared at the carpet in shame, not wanting to see his reaction to my impulsive words.

"Bella," he said gently, tilting my chin up so I was forced to look into his eyes. "Stop thinking of yourself as equal to the dirt outside. You're so much more than that. You're a valued person. I know I don't know you very well, hell we've only spoken twice for the first time in years, but I know that much, at least. I've seen it, even with the little time we've spent together. You care for Alice like she's your child, not your sister. You're unfailingly polite despite the difficulties you've faced, and you're worth much more than you think, all-right?"

My throat clogged up with the emotions I was experiencing and I tried to hold the tears back that I could feel coming.

Although it probably made me sound like an imbecile, I blurted out the words yet again. "Thank you."

And then, without thinking about it, I put my arms around his chest and hugged him tightly, burying my head into his shoulder.

His hands found my back naturally, and he returned my embrace with no words of protest.

I almost laughed aloud when I thought of what I was doing, but then I sighed instead.

Yes, I was hugging a stranger.

But he wasn't a stranger anymore.

He was just Edward.

And Edward's hugs were the best.

We continued to hug for another minute, and although the breaking apart was a little awkward, I didn't regret hugging him for a minute.

"You're welcome to anything here. Food, a bath, er…pretty much anything," he told me.

"Is that your way of telling me I stink?" I teased.

He grinned. "Your words, not mine."

"Don't worry, I know I do. A bath would be great actually."

"Here, I'll show you where it is."

Was it just me, or did he sound nervous?

He grabbed my hand and led me through the rooms of his house until we reached a small little room in the corner of the house.

"Wait a second, I'll go get you a towel and some clothes to change into," he said, dropping my hand and walking back the way we came.

"Okay," I called out to his retreating figure.

At a lack for anything else to do until he returned, I began to survey my surroundings. His bathroom was like any other, except the fact that it was perhaps a little bigger than average and the bath a little wider than normal. The pale blue colour of the walls artfully matched the colour of the tiles on the floor and I was afraid to touch anything in case I broke something or peeled the paint.

That fear faded away when I saw my reflection in the mirror that hung above one of the sink cabinets. All thoughts slipped away once I saw myself.

I was filthier than I'd thought; dirt seemed to be permanently etched on my face and my hair was greasier than humanly possible. The healthy chestnut it used to be was now a dull brown and I grasped at it in horror. I was also thin, too thin, in a way that couldn't be considered attractive. The only vaguely beautiful feature I could find were my eyes, as they sparkled with hope and had not lost their brown hue.

"I hope these are okay," I heard Edward say apologetically behind me.

I twisted around, and smiled gratefully at him while taking the clothes and the towel he was offering to me.

His presence alone made me forget all my worries.

Including the ones about my appearance.

"Yeah, they should be fine."

"The clothes belong to my cousin Rosalie. She left them here by accident when she stayed here a few weeks ago. Her style is very…different to yours."

"That's okay. Clothes are clothes."

He grinned. "I thought you'd say that."

"Well, I…"

"Well, you…"

We both said at the same time.

There were a few seconds of silence before Edward continued. I blushed at my interruption.

"Well, I'll be in my room; it's the room on the left from this one. You're welcome to come in when you're done."

"Okay."

He turned to walk away. "Have fun."

I rolled my eyes. "Will do."

It was a bit unnerving to watch him walk away when I was in such an unfamiliar place, but, like he'd said, he was only a room away.

It made me feel a lot more comfortable than it should have.

This crush I had was really getting ridiculous.

I hardly knew the man.

But he'd helped me where others had not, so I guessed that this trust I'd placed in him was earned.

It just scared me a little sometimes.

A clash from somewhere in the house made me jump, and remember where I was.

It would inconvenience Edward and his parents if I were to stay in here too long.

And I owed them my life.

Shoving all thoughts aside, I turned the tap of the bath on and adjusted it to a temperature that was very warm, but that wouldn't scald my body.

I tossed the towel and the clothes Edward had given me to the ground and stripped out of the disgusting clothes I wore. At first they stuck to my skin like glue but when I applied some force to it with my fingers, they unlatched immediately. Then I was finally able to step into the bath and sink into its warm waters.

Ah.

Finally.

I'd thought this day would never come.

Warmth filled my body, right up to my core, and I didn't know what was better, this or food.

The issue was certainly debatable.

Here, basking in the heavenly warm water, I was able to reflect on the past two days and replay them in my mind.

It didn't surprise me that when I reached the part of Edward's appearance, I couldn't move onto the next memory.

As I scrubbed off all of the dirt on my body, and shampooed my hair, all I could see was his two green eyes.

And, this time, I didn't fight it.

I just let myself think of them.

…

When I'd dried myself off with the surprisingly fluffy towel, donned the clothes Edward had left for me – he was right, the floral pattern of the blouse and skirt, as well as the flats, were definitely not me – and blow-dried my hair, it was very difficult to force myself to amble into Edward's room, despite how much I wanted to see him.

I looked like a completely different person, and that fact made me feel stupidly self-conscious.

Looking in the mirror after getting out of the bath had been difficult for me. Seeing myself with a clean face, nicely managed hair and fresh clothes could very easily fool me into believing that everything was as it used to be. That my parents were still alive, that I had a house to call my own and friends who had my back no matter what.

But, just like Cinderella, I only got to look like this for a night at the most. After that, I would be sent back to live in the dirt with the rats. This girl that I saw in front of me would be no more, only a memory surfaced in a masochistic moment.

It was hard to keep my tears at bay, but, somehow, I managed.

And, somehow, I gathered the courage to send all of the uncertainty and angst away, and walked out of the room.

I couldn't let Edward see how feeble I was.

The thought of that happening was very degrading.

I stopped outside the door he'd talked about earlier and knocked lightly, trying to banish the fear that arose within me at the thought of this being the wrong door.

I realized how ridiculous my worries were when the door swung open and Edward was there to greet me.

However, they all rushed back when he staggered back a step and I perceived his expression.

His green eyes were wider than I'd ever seen them, his mouth had dropped open and his eyebrows were raised. But then his lips turned up to form a crooked smile, and my worry faded away.

"What happened?" I asked him curiously.

His ears turned pink. "Er…um…it's nothing."

"You looked like you'd just seen a monkey humping a llama."

"Interesting choice of words."

"Come on, tell me."

"It's…never mind."

"Please, tell me!" I pleaded, dying of curiosity.

"Youjustlookreallybeautifulth at'sall."

"I look like what? I only got the first thing you said," I told him, my eyebrows furrowing as I tried to figure out what he'd just said.

Oh shit.

He had a problem with how I looked.

I knew it.

Shit. Shit. Shit.

"It was embarrassing enough the first time," he muttered. "You just look really pretty, okay. Not that you weren't pretty before, but you're even more pretty now."

He looked down.

I couldn't speak.

He thought I was pretty!

Everything seemed so much brighter now.

With my giddiness came confidence. I spoke my mind for once.

"Really? You really think I'm pretty?"

"More than pretty." His cheeks were turning red now too. "Here, I'll show you my room."

How subtle.

His chagrin was adorable though.

He thought I was pretty!

A spring in my step, I followed him into the room he'd walked into and was pulled up short at what I saw.

It was not what I was expecting at all.

His room was so neat, so full of things that I wouldn't expect to find in a guy his age's room.

Instead of playboy magazines, there was a bookshelf filled to the brim with books of all different genres.

Instead of a TV, there was a keyboard with music books littered around it.

Instead of an intimidating rack full of rap music CD cases, there was a stereo with a black iPod Touch sticking out of it.

I had no idea why I had expected those other things; I had never had a brother who could've had them.

Perhaps stereotypical movies were getting the best of me.

"This is so cool," I told him truthfully, edging hesitantly towards the bookshelf.

I was dying to know which books he had read.

Reading used to be one of my favourite things to do back when my parents were alive. I missed it more than any other pastime I used to take up and wished more than anything that I could have one book to call my own.

Sensing my preoccupation with his bookshelf, Edward smiled, took my hand and led me over to it. I raised my hand up unconsciously to stroke the spines of some of the books and curiously read their titles.

"You own a lot of the classics," I noted.

"You can blame my mother for that. She got me into them."

"Well, your mother knows what she's talking about then."

"That she does," he said quietly, carefully, as if not to hurt my feelings.

I snatched my hand away from the books and turned to face him, needing to tell him something important.

"Look, you don't need to watch your words around me. I'm not going to shatter into a million pieces if you mention mothers or fathers. Yes, I miss them, but I'm not going to stop you from talking about yours. Thinking about them gives me fond memories not horrid ones, okay?"

He stared at me in amazement and then gave me a quick hug. "You're the strongest person I know."

"And you're the kindest," I countered, blushing a little at my confession.

"Hardly," he scoffed. "I just do what feels right."

"And this feels right?"

"Which _this _are you referring to?"

With each word, the two of us were getting closer and closer without even realizing it. Before I knew it, our chests were almost touching.

"This," I breathed. "Us. Me being here with you. You could've just chucked me out onto the street after your father healed Alice. Hell, you could've just left me there in the first place, but you've let me into your home and showered every bit of happiness you can possibly put upon me. Does this feel right to you? Or is it all too much?"

"Never," he whispered, his warm breath fanning across my face. "Everything about you is right. If it wasn't, I wouldn't even think about doing this."

Then his mouth was on mine.

Frozen with shock, it took me a second to respond, but once I had there was no going back. I kissed him back fiercely, hungrily, savoring in the feeling that I hadn't even known I had needed.

His lips had to have been made in heaven…or in hell for the desire it awoke inside of me.

He tasted like the most forbidden, most potent substance on this earth, and I couldn't seem to get enough of him.

His tongue swept across the tip of mine, and I moaned involuntarily.

Running out of air, we were forced to pull apart.

Then came the realization of what we'd done.

Everything had all happened so quickly.

I'd gone from simply liking him to…_kissing _him.

My hand went instinctively to cover my mouth and I stared at him, not knowing what to say.

He seemed to be at a lack for words also.

But, finally, he spoke, his voice quiet.

"I probably should say I'm sorry for doing that, but I'm not. I'm really not."

"We…" I could hardly get the words out. "We're strangers."

He shook his head. "I don't care. I feel like I understand you better than most people."

"You know what, screw it," I muttered, pushing him back against the bookcase and kissing him with as much vigor as I felt.

He responded immediately, his hands circling my waist so I was locked in his arms.

"Just so you know, I always liked you. Even back in elementary school when we were kids. There was no way in hell I could forget your face," he confessed, before kissing me again.

"I still can't believe this. That you like someone like me!"

"I like you because you're you, not because of where you live or what you've done."

"I like you too," I admitted. "A lot. Agh, I can't believe I'm doing this."

"Why hide what you feel when I feel it too?"

"Good point. I guess because it's so new to me. The street isn't exactly a gateway for romance."

"You'll never have to live there again. I swear I'll find a way."

My heart swelled with hope at his promise and I could tell that he truly meant what he said.

This time, when he kissed me, it was tender.

Affectionate.

It portrayed how much he cared about me already.

Somehow, this kiss was better than the last.

Our kissing was interrupted by the sound of a door being swung open in the distance and my eyes snapped open in irritation.

"My mother must be home," he muttered, stroking my cheek and stepping away from me deftly. "We need to talk about this later, okay?"

"Okay," I whispered.

He smiled.

No sooner had we sat on his sofa – yes, he had a leather sofa in his room – when a tall, elegant woman who I assumed to be Edward's mother, walked into the room.

No, it couldn't be!

I let out a gasp of surprise.

The woman's face was almost identical to the person who had helped Alice and I on the street those few years ago. There were a few differences, but they were minute.

Her caramel hued hair was the same, only it was cut in a much shorter style, and her eyes were a brighter green than I remembered. She was also a lot slimmer.

"You…I…what?" I stuttered.

Edward looked at me strangely but let it pass.

"Did Dad tell you about Bella and Alice?" he asked.

She sighed. "Yes, he did. We have an interesting situation in our hands here."

Her gaze then turned to me and she smiled at me hesitantly but amiably like you would a stranger. She didn't even look like she even vaguely recognized me. I couldn't stop the disappointment that surged through me. Did she work for a charity that supported homeless people then? I doubted my face was that forgettable.

Then she blushed. "Oh, how rude of me; hi, Bella, I'm Edward's mother, Esme."

She held out a hand for me to shake.

I took it tentatively and then shook it.

"Nice to meet you, Mrs. Cullen," I said timidly, not knowing what else to say to the woman who had saved our life but couldn't even remember doing it.

"Call me Esme. From what I hear, you're going to be spending quite some time here, and there's no point in starting with formalities."

I gaped.

Edward did too.

"Do you mean…?"

"Yes, we've decided to let you and Alice stay here until we figure something out."

"For real?" I asked her, just making sure.

"Of course."

"Thank you so much. You have absolutely no idea how much this means to me." I jumped to my feet and hugged her, unable to contain my excitement.

She smiled. "You can thank Edward mostly."

He looked away sheepishly.

"When did you have time to talk about this?" I asked him in amazement.

"My dad rang while you were in the bathroom."

"This is unreal."

"I told you'd I'd work something out," he whispered into my ear.

It wouldn't surprise me if I was as outwardly glowing with joy as I was inward.

I couldn't wait to tell Alice!

"Does Alice know yet?"

"Not yet; we wanted you to tell her," Esme told me.

"Which room will she and Alice be staying in, Mom?" Edward asked.

"Come on, I'll show you."

…

The room Esme introduced to me was better than I'd ever dreamed. It had a bunk bed with purple sheets and fluffy white pillows for Alice and I, a mini bookshelf with a few strays books lodged there, and a mahogany desk and chair.

Even the view was beautiful.

It overlooked a lake in the distance and showcased the beautiful sky.

I couldn't believe my luck!

Then again, Esme could've led me to a stable and I would've accepted it with open arms.

"This is perfect," I told her, running my hand over the generic pattern of the crimson curtains that framed the window.

She beamed. "I'm glad you like it. My niece and nephew sometimes stay in here when they sleep over."

I looked down guiltily at the clothes I was wearing.

I felt like I was stealing their things.

They probably wouldn't like me if they knew.

"Of course they don't sleep over nearly as often as they used to," Edward said casually, noticing my tension.

"Yes, well, ever since…" She trailed off. "Well, I won't talk about it. It's a conversation too heavy for a first meeting."

I tactfully changed the subject.

"So you don't mind me staying here?"

"It will be a pleasure having you here. I already met Alice when I stopped off at the hospital to talk to my husband. She's a delightful little girl. I've missed children's innocence so much."

She sighed wistfully.

"And you seem like a nice girl. Edward's already told me so much about you on the phone. I was there when Carlisle, Edward's father, called."

"I swear I won't cause any trouble or anything. You won't regret having us."

She smiled. "I know I won't."

Our conversation was intercepted when I heard Alice yell my name from somewhere in the house.

Before I knew it, she was bounding into my arms.

"I'm going to get all better! They gave me some strawberry medicine to drink and it tastes yummy!"

"That's great," I told her truthfully, scooping her up in my arms and hugging her tightly.

"So where are we gonna go now?" she asked innocently.

"I have some good news." I paused, taking in her reaction; she was gazing at me solemnly. "We get to stay here!"

She simply stared at me for a second before she squealed and ran out of my arms, jumping up and down crazily.

"We get to live with Edward and his daddy and live in a big house!" she exclaimed.

We all laughed.

"Yes, we do. Now remember to say thank you."

"Thank you," she said brightly to Edward's father and then to Esme. They both smiled at us, the epitome of friendly, and I beamed back at them, then at Edward.

_A home…we had a home._

And it was with Edward.

Life couldn't get any better than this.

…

Two weeks had passed and I still hadn't gathered the courage to ask Esme if it was her who had given Alice and I the money and our precious glass on that insanely lucky day in Seattle. The glass had a place of honor on my nightstand and Alice had taken to the cute habit of kissing the rim of it every night before she went to bed. "Because without that glass," she told me seriously. "We wouldn't be living in a big house with all my friends."

Alice had taken a very fast liking to Esme and regarded her as an aunt of some sort. Nobody could replace her mother, and Esme didn't try to, but she did dote on her like a mother would.

I didn't think Alice had ever been this spoilt in her life, even with our own parents.

Esme bought her toys, books, new clothes and anything else Alice asked for.

I loved Esme like an aunt too, but I wasn't as vocal about it as Alice was.

Edward seemed pleased with how well we all got along.

However, I had a feeling that things might change if his parents found out about our secret relationship – if it could even be called that. We hadn't really put a label to our relationship, and until we did, our secret kisses and whispered words were going to remain just that.

Then again, I had a feeling Esme knew.

Every time Edward and I walked out of a vacant room, both flushed and wary, Esme smirked at the both of us and then went back to what she was doing.

Well, if she knew about us, then she didn't stop it.

And for that I was also forever grateful.

Because his kisses were so damn good.

…

It was after the four of us had eaten dinner, Esme, Alice, Edward and I – Carlisle had been called to hospital to perform an emergency surgery (like Esme, Edward's father insisted that I call him by his first name) – that I finally got a backbone and asked if I could have a private talk with Esme.

It was time to find if my hunch was correct.

Edward looked at me curiously but understood my need for privacy and coerced Alice to her room with a promise that he'd play "Barbie dolls" with her.

Man, he must like me if he did that.

I still couldn't believe it.

But every bit of affection Edward showed me made the fact that he liked me gradually more credible.

And he showed me a lot of affection.

Life was good and I was happy.

I just hoped that this talk with Esme wouldn't change that.

"I hope everything's alright," Esme said anxiously, crossing her legs as we watched Alice and Edward leave the room.

I was quick to assure her. "No, no. Everything's great. I just wanted to ask you something."

"Ask me anything. You and Alice have made this house ten times brighter. I owe _you_, not the other way around."

"Thank you," I replied, startled by her words.

"Truly you have." She smiled. "Now ask away."

I started out vague, too afraid to blurt what I needed to say, right out. "Have you ever been to Seattle before?"

"Why?" She seemed genuinely shocked by my question. "Do you have distant family that live there?"

My heart sunk.

"No, but have you been there?"

"Well, yes, my sister used to live there." Her voice faltered a little.

"Did you…" I hesitated. "Did you ever give this to someone?"

I held out the glass for her to see.

She gasped.

I smiled slightly.

That was a good sign.

"That looks exactly like the glass that my sister used to carry around everywhere. She'd always carry around a glass of water because…well, her health wasn't that good."

I had a nagging feeling that I was missing something vital in this story, and suddenly all of the clues sprung together.

"Can I please see a picture of your sister? The one you're talking about," I asked her politely, only barely containing the adrenaline surging through my veins.

She appeared bewildered by my request. "If you'd like to. She was a lovely woman. You would've absolutely adored her."

"She was, as in she's not any more?" I whispered a second too late.

Esme was back with a framed picture before I was capable of forming coherent thoughts again.

_Was?_

_Not is?_

_Does that mean…_

"Here, this is Elizabeth," Esme said softly, passing me the bronze frame.

Staring at me out of the picture frame was a face I couldn't mistake. Yes, she looked exactly like Esme, but she was also undeniably the woman who had helped Alice and I out on the street.

I'd mistaken Esme for her sister.

In the picture, Elizabeth was holding an adorable little boy in her lap – who was wearing a blue shirt with suspenders and had honey blond hair – and she was standing next to a tall, beautiful, woman who also had blonde hair, and looked to be around my age.

"That was taken about a month before she passed on."

"I'm so sorry," I whispered, truly meaning it. "Who are these two?"

"My niece Rosalie and my nephew Jasper. Elizabeth was my twin sister."

That explained why Esme looked so much like her.

"When did she…"

"Two years ago," she murmured. "Of cancer. It was too late when she found out."

"I'm sorry," I said again.

"Why are you so interested in her?"

"I think I met her," I admitted.

Esme's mouth popped open. "How? Where? When?"

"Two years ago, Alice and I were asking for money on the street when this woman came up to us and gave us ten dollars and this glass of water." I gestured to the mentioned glass. "I thought you were her."

There were a few moments of silence.

I held my breath.

"I was right," Esme whispered, stunned.

And then she smiled, a smile of awe, a smile of excitement.

"Right?"

"Elizabeth told me about finding a teenager and a little girl on the street, practically on the verge of death. She was in her last stages of cancer and as much as she wanted to take you in, she couldn't. She was too weak for that.

"She saw how young you were, how easily you could die out there, how much you reminded her of her own children, and it made her realize to be thankful that she got those forty years that she did. She wasn't afraid when she died. I think you two helped with that."

"Wow," was all I could say.

Her smile seemed to get even more radiant when she spoke again. "Bella, she put you and Alice in her will. She was a very wealthy woman. She didn't know your names, but she told me that if I ever saw two young homeless girls, holding her glass, then I was to give them the money when she died."

"A will?" I spluttered.

"Bella, you and Alice can hold your own now. My sister has left you probably hundreds of thousands of dollars in the least."

"Are you serious?"

"Do you think I'm joking?"

"It'd be more realistic than…than this."

"Elizabeth was the CEO of her company and so was our grandmother. You can trust me that she was very well off."

"But what about her children, Rosalie and Jasper?"

"They were given more than enough money. You can even ask Rosalie yourself. I'm sure she'd love to meet you. She told Rosalie the story too."

"So…I…I have money now. I don't only have money, but I'm also rich."

"I guess you could put it that way. I don't like using the term 'rich' though. It makes us sound snobby and emotionless."

"This can't be happening." I put my head in my hands. "She left a will. I have _money_?"

I couldn't seem to comprehend this.

I had to be dreaming.

This had to be a joke.

There was no way that I could suddenly be the bearer of hundreds of thousands of dollars!

She grinned. "Alice too."

Tears began gushing down my cheeks and I hugged Esme, unable to believe my good fortune. She hugged me back tightly and wiped the tears from my cheeks.

"Of course, you have to be eighteen to receive this money, but, if I'm not mistaken, you will be of that age in a month."

"Yes, that's right." I smiled.

"Until then, you and Alice can continue to stay here. We love having you here."

"This is insane. I can't wait to tell Alice and Edward!"

She waved her hand. "Go tell them then, I'm sure they'll be very excited to hear your news."

"Thank you. Thank you. Thank _you!_" I said breathlessly, hugging her again.

Esme smiled softly.

"Don't thank me. Thank Elizabeth."

She had no idea how much I already had.

Then I made a promise.

A promise in Elizabeth's honor.

If I ever had a little girl, and I couldn't help thinking that she would be Edward's child too, I would name her after the woman with the most charitable heart.

The woman with the long, billowy caramel hair and green eyes would most definitely never be forgotten.

Then I smiled and walked away to find my sister, and the possible love of my life.

* * *

**If you liked this, then leaving me a review saying so would be awesome :)**


	3. Repercussions

**Repercussions **

**Challenge Number/Title: 3# Word Play**  
**Date Posted: 7/2/13**

**Fandom: Twilight**  
** Rating: T**  
** Genre: Canon. Set during Eclipse**.  
** Content Descriptors: Romance and angst.**  
** Character Pairing: Edward and Bella.**

**This one-shot is Edward's perspective of the 'tent scene' which takes place in Eclipse. The dialogue rightfully belongs to Stephenie Meyer and I acknowledge this fact.  
**

* * *

I supposed I deserved the troubles I was facing now. If I hadn't left Bella, we wouldn't be facing them. Yes, I was well aware that my attempt at being noble had failed miserably, and that the repercussions I was forced to deal with were well earned, but did they have to affect everyone around me also?

I hadn't been lying to Bella when I'd told her that my family was in no danger from fighting the Newborns, but every second that Victoria remained alive, Bella continued to feel threatened, and countless innocent humans were going to die at her hand due to her insatiable thirst, and I wanted – no needed – to annihilate her soon. I didn't doubt my ability to protect Bella; there was nothing I took more seriously than making sure my beloved was safe, but the sooner Victoria was gone from our lives, the better. Of course, Bella made my job rather difficult sometimes when her stubborn nature got in the way, and I really wished she'd stop underestimating the danger that was constantly forced upon her. This brought me to the two main repercussions that I was forced to face daily, one of which was a real and precarious problem, while the other was quite childish, but still infuriated me to no end, and sometimes irritated me more than the first.

The first of which was Victoria. She'd have been caught and decapitated months ago if I hadn't been wallowing away in the slums of Rio over Bella's absence. Yes, I'd been trying to track Victoria during that time, but my lack of skill due to her irksome ability, and the fact that I had no one to aid me, had made that quite impossible. If I'd waited in Forks, perhaps my family would've cornered her and we wouldn't have had to waste time tomorrow killing a coven of Newborns, and Victoria herself. If I'd killed her back then, then Bella wouldn't be in the arms of a werewolf right now.

I shuddered.

That brought me to the second repercussion of my leaving Bella.

Jacob Black.

If there were one person on the earth I could choose to damn to hell, it would be him. The way he looked at, and thought of my beloved, disgusted me. He wanted her, not because of how amazing she was, but because he couldn't have her. It astounded me how Bella couldn't see past his cocky smirks, how she didn't take notice of how often he manipulated her, and why she couldn't grasp that he'd never settle for just being her friend. I didn't blame her for any of this; it was only because of her goodness, her ability to disregard all faults people had, to interpret their actions as being justifiable no matter the circumstance that she was able to see past all of his scheming. She'd proved this point every time she simply looked at me. Somehow she saw past the inhuman coldness of my skin, and the monster that resided somewhere within me, and found something there that even I couldn't deem redeemable.

She had no idea of how much it hurt me, however, when she brushed off my warnings of how violate he was and went to see the dog anyway, despite how I'd advised against it. If only she could see my way, understand why I worried so. The little touches she shared with him, the smiles that were only for him, inflicted jagged cuts against my long dormant heart and I would give anything to make it stop. I knew she meant it only as a platonic gesture, but to him it was much more, and he liked to flaunt it in my face whenever he could.

In some ways, Jacob Black was still a child.

Yet, despite that fact, I would kill him without a second thought if Bella was not so against me doing so. The look of utter betrayal on her face that I knew would surface when she discovered what I'd done was the only thing that kept me from ripping his head off right at this second.

Yes, I'll admit that it wasn't just because of the danger that his kind presented to Bella, which stirred up this intense fury inside of me at the mere sight of him.

Half of me was riddled with incurable jealousy.

I absolutely loathed him for the future he could give Bella. She could have a career if she chose to be with him, could grow old with him…have children. Before I'd met Bella, it had never bothered me that I'd never be a father, but to think of Bella never being a mother, seemed the cruellest injustice on earth.

I completely abhorred him for being to understand her in those times that I couldn't. As much as I detested the fact, there were just some holes I couldn't fill, things that were only fun when she did them with him. Her reaction to the motorcycle I'd bought a few weeks ago was cold, hard proof of that.

I hated how even after she'd accepted my marriage proposal, I was still unsure of my hold on her, on if she'd change her mind and run into his arms.

He was warm like the sun; I was cold like death.

For anybody but Bella, the choice would've been obvious.

But as far as I knew, she _had_ chosen me, chosen to be my _wife_. I smiled as I thought of the previous night, of the moment when she'd agreed to marry me. Yes, it had taken some convincing and compromising on my part, but now I'd soon be able to officially call her my soul-mate, and no man would ever be able to even look her way again, but me. It bothered me a little that she didn't wear the ring – nothing pleased me more than seeing my mother's delicate ring on her finger – as I wished to proclaim to the world that she'd said yes to me, but I could understand why she didn't want Jacob or her friends to find out straight away.

I wasn't an imbecile; I knew that it would be difficult when Jacob found out. I anticipated the moment almost as much as I feared it. The anticipation was solely for the look on the mutts face when he realised that his conquest had failed. The fear was over how Bella would handle his reaction. I couldn't stand her being in pain; she didn't deserve any of this. If I hadn't left in the damn first place then the moronic dog wouldn't have formed a friendship with Bella.

However, regrets wouldn't send the consequences away.

And I was getting the full brunt of them tonight.

No words could describe the agony of having to listen to Jacob's thoughts as he held Bella close to him as she slept in his arms. I knew it was necessary to prevent Bella from freezing to death, but that didn't make it any easier to witness. If I were human, my fists would be broken from the force applied as I clenched them. It killed me to see the tranquillity in her features as she dreamed, and I could only hope that she weren't dreaming of a certain werewolf. There was only so much I could take. We would find out soon, I doubted that her sleep-talking habit would abate just because of the new environment.

I winced a little as I processed Jacob's thoughts. This time he was thinking of a scenario where Bella began to yell for me to leave her alone, and then when I did so, she ran over to Jacob and kissed him more fiercely than she ever did with me. His arrogant little daydreams were getting progressively worse as the night went on. At first they were tame, and all I could read was the smugness he bore, but then they began to grow more explicit. I tried as best as I could to ignore them, but it was as if he was shouting them for the entire world to hear.

My wince transformed into a low growl when I saw the latest fantasy that was playing in his head. I wasn't sure if I was meant to witness this one or not. Either way I was thoroughly horrified and furious.

I was surprised that my fists _didn't _break off.

It was of Bella hovering over Jacob on the tent floor as he swept his unworthy hands over her glorious body. She then moaned his name before laying a trail of hungry kisses up and down his chest.

They were both naked.

Jacob then began to imagine penetrating her.

The thought of Bella doing _that _with the mutt made me angry beyond comparison. Although this generation didn't realise it, making love to someone was not something you just did. It was a sacred act, and one that you should share with your partner and no one else. Even though I was reluctant to attempt the act with Bella while she was still human, it made me feel murderous to even consider Bella deflowering herself for someone else, let alone seeing it in my mind, and for the mutt of all people. The infuriated words that slipped out were hardly of my accord.

"_Please! _Do you _mind!"_

To my surprise, Jacob looked up, confusion lining his features. "What?"

As if he didn't know the hell he was putting me through!

He could at least have the decency to act like he knew what I was talking about.

I spoke through gritted teeth, only barely able to conceal my fury. "Do you think you could _attempt _to control your thoughts?"

"No one said you had to listen. Get out of my head."

He sounded oddly embarrassed.

Ah, he hadn't intended for me to see his little fantasy then.

This didn't appease me in the slightest bit.

Even though the image had vanished from Jacob's mind, it hadn't quite been banished from mine.

The thought of the mutt's disgusting body pressed against the innocence of Bella's made me see red.

"I wish I _could_. You have no idea how loud your little fantasies are. It's like you're shouting them at me," I said in revulsion.

His chagrin quickly altered into that of his usual smug demeanour.

"I'll try to keep it down."

His sarcasm then turned into a silent question.

'_What? Wish you could be with her without hurting her?'_

"Yes, I'm jealous of that too," I admitted.

There was nothing else I could do, but perhaps answering his questions – however vindictive – would make the night pass more quickly, and keep the disgusting fantasies out of his head. I would do anything to keep them at bay.

"I figured it was like that. Sort of evens the playing field up a little, doesn't it?"

I laughed. Bella never cared about how dangerous things were if they made her happy; I was living proof. "In your dreams."

"You know, she could still change her mind. Considering _all _the things I could do with her that you can't. At least not without killing her, that is."

This time when he thought of he and Bella together, it was deliberate.

This time, however, he was groping her.

My eyes narrowed dangerously.

It was difficult to resist the urge to crush his skull so he wouldn't be capable of thinking any more.

The way he imagined them being together was exactly why he was so wrong for her.

"Go to sleep Jacob," I hissed. "You're starting to get on my nerves."

"I think I will. I'm really very comfortable."

It seemed he wanted to get a rise out of me. Well he wouldn't get one; it would get _me _nowhere.

But then he thought something I couldn't refrain from answering to, and my resolve to keep silent was broken.

'_There are so many things I'm dying to know. His thoughts would be priceless right now. But there's no way in hell he'd share them with me. He's too introverted and stuck-up.'_

"Maybe I would."

I knew this was the only way to keep him from thinking the blasphemous thoughts he was thinking before.

"But would you be honest?" he wondered.

Now there was the question.

I wasn't quite sure what to say. "You can always ask and see."

"Well, you see inside my head – let me see inside of yours tonight, it's only fair."

'_This should be interesting. I wonder how it feels to have your girlfriend sleep – well not sleep with but ugh… you know, spoon with your worst enemy. Or better yet, I could ask why the hell he came back to Forks after leaving Bella the way he did. Or how he can pass up such a good fight. I mean there's nothing in the fucking world, which is going to make me miss this fight. Then again, Bella was acting like she'd committed a murder earlier today when I asked. Maybe she guilt tripped him. That doesn't sound like Bella though. Agh, who cares, there are so many things I could ask. I wonder what he'd say if I asked him what he'd do if Bella chose me, which of course could still happen, and if I have a say in anything, it will happen. The bloodsucker just won't admit it.' _

They were all very personal and complicated questions, so I simply said, "your head is full of questions. Which one do you want me to answer?"

He only needed to think for a few seconds before answering.

"The jealousy…it _has _to be eating at you. You can't be as sure as you seem. Unless you have no emotions at all."

The werewolves really had flawed views of us. Of course we had emotions; we weren't damn machines. I thought the jealousy was as plain on my face as it was burning inside of me.

I could tell Jacob's question was of pure curiosity, so I guessed not.

"Of course it is. Right now it's so bad that I can barely control my voice. Of course, it's even worse when she's away from me, with you, and I can't see her."

Those days were the worst of my existence, aside, of course from the days when I'd left her altogether.

"Do you think about it all the time?" he whispered. "Does it make it hard to concentrate when she's not with you?"

It was very difficult to answer such private questions so honestly, but once I'd begun speaking, it actually became surprisingly easy.

"Yes and no. My mind doesn't work quite the same way as yours. I can think of many more things at one time. Of course, that means that I'm _always _able to think of you, always able to wonder if that's where her mind is, when she's quiet and thoughtful."

It was at those times that I would trade anything to hear her thoughts.

'_Oh, so you're not the only person that she thinks about? You must hate that."_

His thoughts had taken on a smug edge again.

"Yes, I would guess that she thinks about you often. More often than I like. She worries that you're unhappy. Not that you don't know that. Not that you don't _use _that."

It wouldn't surprise me if he detected the bitterness in my tone.

"I have to use whatever I can," he muttered. "I'm not working with your advantages – advantages like her knowing she's in love with you."

His thoughts enlightened me on why he lacked a guilty conscience.

'_He makes me sound like a complete ass.'_

"That helps," I agreed.

I was aware that I had the upper hand here, but that didn't mean that I couldn't lose.

"She's in love with me, too, you know."

Just hearing him say the mere words, was painful. It reminded me that even though Bella had given me her heart, some of it belonged to someone else, and I had no one to blame but myself. If only I hadn't left her…

He sighed. "But she doesn't know it."

I didn't know if it was real love she felt for him, or if it was merely platonic, but either way she could still choose him. I wanted more than anything for it to be the latter, but somewhere deep down; I knew it was the first. "I can't tell you if you're right."

"Does that bother you? Do you wish you could see what she's thinking, too?"

I answered honestly. "Yes…and no again. She likes it better this way, and, though it sometimes drives me insane, I'd rather she was happy."

The silence that rang between us after I'd finished speaking was made more so by the howling wind outside. Jacob's hold on Bella tightened, and for the first time since we'd gotten here, I was relieved that Jacob was here to keep her warm. It made me jealous, insurmountably so, and caused me immense mental pain, but she was warm and looked comfortable which was all that mattered.

"Thank you," I whispered, all my pride having been thrown out the window. "Odd as this might sound, I suppose I'm glad you're here, Jacob."

He gathered my true meaning right away.

'_Like hell he means that.'_

"You mean, 'as much as I'd love to kill you, I'm glad she's warm' right?"

Hmmm, he and I were on the same page for once.

"It's an uncomfortable truce, isn't it?"

"I knew you were just as crazy jealous as I am."

Even though I tried to keep Bella from noticing my blatant jealousy, I hadn't been keeping it a secret from him tonight. He obviously wasn't very perceptive.

For once I could afford to be arrogant.

"I'm not such a fool to wear it on my sleeve like you do. It doesn't help your case, you know."

"You have more patience than I do," he muttered.

"I should. I've had a hundred years to gain it. A hundred years of waiting for _her_."

I smiled internally at that.

Those one hundred years, however dull, were worth enduring if it meant being with her.

"So…at what point did you decide to play the very patient good guy?"

I could tell this was one of the questions he was most curious about.

It took me a few seconds longer than it usually did to reply. I _knew_ theanswer, just not how to explain it so he'd understand.

"When I saw how much it was hurting her to make her choose. It's not usually this difficult to control. I can smother the…less civilised feelings I may have for you fairly easily most of the time. Sometimes I think she sees through me, but I can't be sure."

I frowned as I thought of that.

'_Bullshit'_

"I think you were just worried that if you really forced her to choose, she might not choose you."

I couldn't deny that he was partially right.

That didn't mean I was happy with his assumption.

I didn't even want to consider what would happen if she chose him.

I was being pushed to my breaking point tonight, it seemed.

"That was part of it," I admitted. "But only a small part. We all have our moments of doubt. Mostly I was worried that she'd hurt herself trying to sneak away to see you. After I'd accepted that she was more or less safe with you – as safe as Bella ever is – it seemed best to stop driving her to extremes."

He sighed. "I'd tell her all of this, but she'd never believe me."

I grinned. "I know."

"You think you know everything," he said irritably.

My smile faded as I thought of the one thing I _didn't_ know, but wanted to know more than anything. "I don't know the future."

'_He's really not as confident as he thinks…I could make this work in my favour."_

"What would you do if she changed her mind?"

I banished the thought immediately before I could form any more doubts.

"I don't know that either."

Jacob laughed, amused at the fact that I finally wasn't sure of something for once.

"Would you try to kill me?"

Who was arrogant now?

He seemed to think that dying by my hand was an impossibility.

If only he knew.

But unfortunately there was no way I could test either of our theories; it would cause Bella pain, and that was something I wouldn't stand for.

"Why not?" he sneered.

"Do you really think I would hurt her that way?"

It seemed that he was incapable of fully grasping how much I loved her.

He had no idea of the love our kind had for our mates.

He really needed to open his eyes and face the facts.

He sighed again. "Yeah, you're right. I know that's right. But sometimes…"

His thoughts turned to one of ripping my head off in his wolf form.

Rather than it being irritating…it was quite amusing.

How I'd like to rip _his _head off.

Or at least break his jaw.

"Sometimes it's an intriguing idea," I agreed.

It took a while for him to reply, as he was laughing into the sleeping bag like there was no tomorrow. Finally he said, 'exactly.

There was a few seconds of silence, before Jacob's thoughts shifted to a place where I couldn't imagine they'd ever go. I thought, like me, he'd refuse to think of what would happen if Bella chose the other way, but we were evidently two very different people.

He was thinking of Bella, still, white, crimson-eyed, cold…an inhuman version of her.

A vampire.

In his mind, she was snarling at whatever was in front of her, red eyes crazed with thirst.

'_I wonder if she'll still look like Bella. It'll be a lot harder to destroy her if she does. Hell, it might be almost impossible. From what she told me, I'm going to have to deal with that very soon if she doesn't change her mind.'_

I flinched.

"What is it like? Losing her? When you thought you'd lost her forever? How did you…cope?"

I refused to think of that time, so I simply answered him impassively, "that's very difficult for me to talk about."

'_Come on, you've got to give me more than that, bloodsucker!' _

"There were two different times that I thought that," I said slowly, unsure if I really wanted to put myself into that place. "The first time, when I thought I could leave her…that was…almost bearable. Because I thought she would forget me and it would be like I hadn't touched her life. For over six months I was able to stay away, to keep my promise that I wouldn't interfere again. It was getting close – I was fighting but I knew I wasn't going to win; I would have come back…just to check on her. That's what I would have told myself, anyway. And If I'd found her reasonably happy…I like to think I could have gone away again."

I was lying to myself with that last statement, I would've always been waiting in the wings for her. It would've killed me to see her with Jacob, but I had to be near her. I'd already proved that it was literally impossible for me to survive if she weren't close by.

I continued. "But she wasn't happy. And I would have stayed. That's how she convinced me to stay with her tomorrow, of course. You were wondering about that before, what could possibly motivate me…what she was so feeling so needlessly guilty about. She reminded me of what it did to her when I left – what it still does to her when I leave. She feels horrible about bringing it up, but she's right. I'll never be able to make up for that, but I'll never stop trying anyway."

Even if it wasn't for the repercussions, I would still be utterly in Bella's debt for how quickly she forgave me, and there wouldn't be a day when my efforts to make up for the whole affair, would cease.

"And the other time – when you thought she was dead?" Jacob asked with difficulty.

His thoughts went back to vampire Bella.

'_How did it feel…I mean, soon I'm going to have to deal with Bella's death whether I like it or not and I want to know how to deal with it…how much it will hurt. The second her heart stops beating…that thing she'll become...she won't be Bella anymore. It'd be better for her to be murdered and be buried in a tomb rather than that. Don't you see that by turning her, you're actually killing her? You should know how I feel, you thought she was dead once.'_

I could see his point of view, but I didn't agree with it.

Carlisle and Esme weren't monsters, yet they were vampires. I didn't want this life for Bella, but she was determined to have it. I would personally make sure she didn't turn into a monster. There were ways to keep the thirst at bay.

"Yes. It will probably feel like that to you, won't it? The way you perceive us, you might not be able to see her as _Bella _anymore. But that's who she'll be."

"That's not what I asked."

Willing myself not to think of that time, I replied coldly, 'I can't tell you how it felt. There aren't words."

And there really weren't.

"But you left because you didn't want to make her a bloodsucker. You _want _her to be human."

I sighed, knowing this would be difficult to explain.

"Jacob, from the second that I realized that I loved her, I knew there were only four possibilities. The first alternative, the best one for Bella, would be if she didn't feel as strongly for me — if she got over me and moved on. I would accept that, though it would never change the way I felt. You think of me as a… living stone — hard and cold." More like ice. "That's true. We are set the way we are, and it is very rare for us to experience a real change. When that happens, as when Bella entered my life, it is a permanent change. There's no going back…

"The second alternative, the one I'd originally chosen, was to stay with her throughout her human life. It wasn't a good option for her, to waste her life with someone who couldn't be human with her, but it was the alternative I could most easily face. Knowing all along that, when she died, I would find a way to die, too. Sixty years, seventy years — it would seem like a very, very short time to me… But then it proved much too dangerous for her to live in such close proximity with my world. It seemed like everything that could go wrong did. Or hung over us… waiting to go wrong. I was terrified that I wouldn't get those sixty years if I stayed near her while she was human.

"So I chose option three. Which turned out to be the worst mistake of my very long life, as you know. I chose to take myself out of her world, hoping to force her into the first alternative. It didn't work, and it very nearly killed us both.

"What do I have left but the fourth option? It's what she wants — at least, she thinks she does. I've been trying to delay her, to give her time to find a reason to change her mind, but she's very… stubborn. You know _that. _I'll be lucky to stretch this out a few more months. She has a horror of getting older, and her birthday is in September…." I trailed off, not wanting to think of the inevitable future.

"I like option one," Jacob muttered.

I wasn't surprised.

It was the option that would benefit him the best. I only wanted what was best for Bella, but what was best for Bella and what she thought she wanted were two very different things.

Jacob continued talking when he noticed that I had nothing to say. "You know _exactly _how much I hate to accept this but I can see that you do love her… in your way. I can't argue with that anymore. Given that, I don't think you should give up on the first alternative, not yet. I think there's a very good chance that she would be okay. After time. You know, if she hadn't jumped off a cliff in March… and if you'd waited another six months to check on her… Well, you might have found her reasonably happy. I had a game plan."

'_I would've found something new for us to do, something fun but not as dangerous as the motorcycles, and distracted her with that, then day by day I would slowly let her know how I felt about her. First with subtle clues and then one day I'd just flat out say it. Without you in the way it might have actually worked. She thinks you're a freakin God, or at least a king. _

I chuckled.

"Maybe it would have worked. It was a well thought-out plan."

"Yeah. But…give me a year, bl —Edward. I really think I could make her happy. She's stubborn, no one knows that better than I do, but she's capable of healing. She would have healed before. And she could be human, with Charlie and Renée, and she could grow up, and have kids and… be Bella."

It was all I wanted for her…but I wished _I _could give it to her, not the stupid mutt. It would make me happier than anything else in this world if I could. But while I couldn't, the mutt _could _give it to her…sometimes I wondered if I were making the right decision.

"You love her enough that you have to see the advantages of that plan. She thinks you're very unselfish… are you really? Can you consider the idea that I might be better for her than you are?" Jacob said, for once not conceitedly, even though his words suggested otherwise.

I _have _considered it," I admitted. "In some ways, you would be better suited for her than another human. Bella takes some looking after, and you're strong enough that you could protect her from herself, and from everything that conspires against her. You _have _done that already, and I'll owe you for that for as long as I live — forever — whichever comes first…

"I even asked Alice if she could see that — see if Bella would be better off with you. She couldn't, of course. She can't see you, and then Bella's sure of her course, for now. But I'm not stupid enough to make the same mistake I made before, Jacob. I won't try to force her into that first option again. As long as she wants me, I'm here."

I sure as hell wasn't going to let him make the decision for Bella. If she wanted to be with me, then I wasn't going to let anything get in our way!

"And if she were to decide that she wanted me?"

The arrogance was back.

And this time it had raised to a level as high as the mountain summit we were on.

"I would let her go," I said simply.

"Just like that?"

He couldn't comprehend how someone could be so selfless.

When it came to Bella, I was capable of anything.

"In the sense that I'd never show her how hard it was for me, yes. But I would keep watch. You see, Jacob, _you _might leave her someday. Like Sam and Emily, you wouldn't have a choice. I would always be waiting in the wings, hoping for that to happen."

Well not quite hoping…I knew it would cause Bella immense pain if Jacob left her like that.

Jacob snorted. _'Yeah right, like I'd let that happen. That imprinting crap is a whole load of BS. Bella was meant to be my imprint! _"Well, you've been much more honest than I had any right to expect…Edward. Thanks for letting me into your head."

It was an interesting conversation, excluding the fact that he knew all my insecurities now. I did owe him for what he'd done for Bella so I guessed that was my way of paying him back.

"As I said, I'm feeling oddly grateful for your presence in her life tonight. It was the least I could do…You know, Jacob, if it weren't for the fact that we're natural enemies and that you're trying to steal away the reason for my existence, I might actually like you."

Then again, I didn't think I'd be able to stand the smell. To humans, I supposed his stench was comparable to that of a rotting cabbage.

"Maybe…if you weren't a disgusting vampire who was planning to suck out the life of the girl I love…well, no, not even then."

I chuckled. His view on vampires could be quite entertaining. I wondered what the chief elders told the members of the reservation to make them see us like that. They knew we weren't the usual monsters that the film industry painted as to be, who slept in coffins or bore fangs, but they had some of the most vital facts wrong. _Some _of us still retained our humanity. Bella had to have heard about what the tribe thought of us when she was at the bonfire, perhaps she could tell me sometime. All she'd told me so far was something about a third wife…what the hell was that about?

I'd given Jacob far enough answers tonight and now it was his turn to give me some.

"Can I ask you something?"

"Why would you have to ask?"

Ha ha.

Either he didn't know the limitations of my ability or he was trying to purposefully irritate me.

I wouldn't put it past him.

"I can only hear if you think of it. It's just a story that Bella seemed reluctant to tell me about the other day. Something about a third wife…?"

"What about it?" he said, confused.

Not knowing what I wanted to hear, he replayed the entire story of the third wife in his head. At first I didn't get why Bella was so interested in the story…then the sacrifice part arose, and it all made sense.

I hissed.

"What?" Jacob demanded.

I sighed angrily. "Of course! I rather wish your elders had kept _that _story to themselves, Jacob."

"You don't like the leeches being painted as the bad guys? You know, they _are_. Then _and _now."

I was well aware of that fact; I hated the majority of my kind for what we did. You'd think he'd realise this after the discussion we'd just had.

"I really couldn't care less about that part. Can't you guess which character Bella would identify with?"

I didn't know if it was because it was of how slow the human brain was, or because it was just Jacob, but either way it took him a few minutes to get it.

"Oh. Ugh. The third wife. Okay, I see your point."

He could also see the problem it presented.

"She wants to be there in the clearing. To do what little she can, as she puts it." I sighed, wishing she would put herself first before anybody else for once.

"That was the secondary reason for my staying with her tomorrow. She's quite inventive when she wants something."

I repressed a smile.

"You know, your military brother gave her the idea just as much as the story did."

"Neither side meant any harm," I whispered, not wanting to cause any more arguments. I didn't want Bella to wake up to what could possibly be a very violent fight if it got out of control.

"And when does _this _little truce end? First light? Or do we wait until after the fight?"

I didn't think I could stand being civil that long.

"First light," we said simultaneously.

We both chuckled at our timing.

"Sleep well, Jacob," I said, signifying that I wished the conversation to end. "Enjoy the moment."

It was probably the wrong thing to say, as his thoughts went back to the disgusting avenue they had been in before, where he was imagining doing unspeakable things to the love of my existence.

I couldn't control the groan that slipped out. "I didn't mean that quite so literally."

"Sorry. You could leave, you know – give us some privacy."

It wouldn't matter how far I went, I would probably still hear his shouted fantasies.

"_I can't even fucking sleep anyway because he's here, staring at me." _

"Would you like me to _help _you sleep, Jacob?" I said sarcastically.

"You could try. It would be interesting to see who walked away, wouldn't it?"

"Don't tempt me too far, wolf," I warned. "My patience isn't _that _perfect."

He laughed. "I'd rather not move just now, if you don't mind."

His thoughts went back to the porno in his head.

Trying to block it out, I hummed the lullaby I'd written for Bella, hoping that thoughts of her would distract me from Jacob's disturbing ones.

It actually seemed to work for a while. I could still hear Jacob's filthy daydream in the background, but the bigger part of me was imagining Bella on our wedding day. I smiled slightly as I envisioned her walking down the aisle, wearing a dress of traditional white and blushing beautifully every step she took.

My daydream came to an abrupt halt when I remembered Charlie.

He wouldn't make this easy.

It was a good thing I was bulletproof, otherwise Bella might not have a fiancé any more.

I didn't think we'd have a problem with Renee, she seemed pretty happy for us when we visited her and her husband in Jacksonville, but I could be wrong.

Those were the only two people I was concerned about. I not only needed their opinion, but I _wanted _it.

I didn't give a damn about every other human in the town.

They could think all they liked.

I knew _my_ family was ecstatic.

Especially Esme.

She had given up hope that I'd ever find my soul-mate, and now that I had, everything was right in her world as it should be.

The only person who came even close to being as excited as Esme, was Alice, and she was a whole other story.

She dreamed of a white wedding like I did, but Bella wanted a simple one. I wondered who would win that argument. If I had my way it would be Bella. Her wants trumped mine and as long as we were getting married, it didn't matter where, or who attended.

My blissful train of thought was interrupted when I heard Bella's voice.

"Edward," she mumbled.

I smiled.

Now the dog would really see who Bella dreamed of at night!

Perhaps the future was clearer than I thought.

* * *

**I'm going to end it here because I'm Team Edward and going any further would be torture for me. I can't write about Edward's pain at Bella's betrayal because that would just be cruel, and you know what happens any way. **

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**


	4. An Inevitable Fate

**An Inevitable Fate**

**Challenge Number/Title: 4# Mother's Forgiveness **  
**Date Posted: 8/2/13**

**Fandom: Twilight**  
** Rating: T**  
** Genre: Canon. Set during Twilight. **  
** Content Descriptors: Romance, angst and family. **  
** Character Pairing: Edward and Bella.**

**This one-shot is about Edward's thoughts as he runs back to Forks, after having gone to Alaska to escape Bella's scent at the beginning of_ Twilight_.  
**

* * *

Even with the intense speed I was running at, I could still see her face as clearly as the snow-infested pine trees surrounding the passage I took.

The teenage girl with the delectable blood whose mind I couldn't read.

Bella Swan.

She was the sole reason why I was darting through the Alaskan plains, in an effort to return to my family. I didn't blame her; to do so would be unfair. It wasn't her fault her blood was sweeter than any I'd ever encountered in my one hundred and ten years of living. However, although I desired her blood, it was something else that kept her constantly on my mind. I presumed it was because her thoughts were permanently barred to me, and I had no idea why. Repressing my curiosity was not one of my strongest traits, being as inquisitive as I was, and it bothered me that I didn't know her true character.

She was a mystery that I needed to solve.

A distraction from the monotonous life I lived.

Unfortunately, due to her scent it appeared that I never would.

Her scent had changed everything.

However, I couldn't loathe her for a fault that was purely mine.

My hatred was for my weakness – my thirst for her blood, the thing that I'd been fighting constantly against since the second I'd caught a whiff of it in my Biology period. It prevented me from being where I wanted to be most, and forced me to leave my family behind.

I hadn't even gotten to say goodbye to my mother, Esme.

Although we weren't blood related, Esme was as much my mother as Elizabeth was. When Carlisle had first brought Esme home – who was in the process of transitioning into one of us – to live with us in the early twenties, I'd been a little jealous of her, worried that Carlisle would completely forget about me and that the two of them would become completely absorbed in their secluded bubble of mated joy. But with Esme being as maternal and loveable as she was, it was impossible for me not to accept her affection, and to happily accept my role as the son she'd always wanted to have. She lived up to her title unconsciously by doing all the things a mother usually did. She praised me when I succeeded in my endeavours, guided me in the right direction when I'd gone astray, given me helpful advice when I'd needed it, and had never judged me even when I'd blatantly deserved contempt.

She was the best mother a person could possibly hope to have.

I wasn't disregarding my human mother; I simply couldn't remember her well enough to remark on her parenting abilities.

However, I loved both my mothers equally.

I'd hurt Esme by running off to Alaska without telling her.

She deserved some notice before I left without letting her know how long I'd be gone.

Sure, Alice would tell her of my decision, but I knew she wouldn't feel as anxious if I'd told her myself.

She didn't like it when her family wasn't fully intact.

It made her nervous.

Even though I was practically invincible, she still worried that someone would take me, and the rest of our family, away from her.

She regarded me as her youngest child, and I supposed in some ways I was, being younger in physical age than my siblings.

Our bond was a special one.

I would definitely approach Esme first when I returned, then Carlisle, of course. The first thing I was going to do when I got back was give her a much-needed apology and then perhaps play her favourite song on my piano. I had neglected my piano playing and composition writing for far too long, and this would be the perfect time to start up again. Perhaps it would ease my guilt a little in addition to gaining Esme's forgiveness.

The only time when I'd hurt Esme this badly was when I'd left she and Carlisle to live a more traditional vampiric lifestyle, as a vigilante. I hadn't been as close to her back then, and when I finally thought of returning to them, having been ridden with guilt at abandoning them and taking human lives, I wasn't sure if they'd accept me back, so I hadn't returned home straight away. It took me four long years to gather up the courage to go back to them. I thought she and Carlisle would shun me for having lived a lifestyle they strongly disapproved of and send me away without a second thought, but like the prodigal son returning to his father, she and Carlisle had accepted me back with open arms and it was like I'd never left.

My respect for them rose to the highest point it could possibly rise on that day.

It showed me that love could truly be unconditional.

And from that moment on, there was no doubt that they were my parents in this life, and that I needed their guidance and love in order to succeed in this world.

But yesterday I had made a similar mistake, except I had run away out of cowardliness instead of in rebellion.

Guilt arose unbidden within in me, and I was too ashamed to force the horrible sensation back.

The guilt I felt was for not being strong enough.

For running away foolishly from my problems.

For not saying goodbye to my family before I left.

For not being a good enough son.

For not being a good enough sibling.

For endangering an innocent, human girl.

For simply being what I was.

Wallowing wouldn't fix my problems though.

Facing them head on and asking for forgiveness would.

I knew that ignoring the Swan girl's scent would be extremely difficult, but my determination not to be driven away from my family, to be able to stay where I belonged, assured me that the task _was_ possible. I would just have to ignore Isabella Swan as profusely as I possibly could.

The thought was strangely…dismal.

I still couldn't quite banish her face from my mind.

It looked like ignoring her scent was going to be as difficult as ignoring her.

She was simply too interesting.

I hoped for the girl's sake, that my interest in her would soon fade.

I needed to stay away from her for both her benefit and mine.

Yet, I couldn't help but note how beautiful her eyes were.

* * *

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	5. Lilting Limericks

**Lilting Limericks**

**Challenge Number/Title: 5# The Limerick **  
**Date Posted: 14/2/13**

**Fandom: Twilight**  
** Rating: T**  
** Genre: Canon (Post Breaking Dawn)**  
** Content Descriptors: Romance, fluff** **and family.**  
** Character Pairing: Edward and Bella**

**Summary: **Edward tries to teach Renesmee how to write a limerick.

* * *

"Do you have to go?" Renesmee exclaimed, as Bella bent down and gave her a hug, and then a kiss on the forehead in farewell.

Bella and I laughed, but I was thinking the same thing as Renesmee.

Like my daughter, I didn't relish the thought of being apart from my wife for even a mere afternoon.

The only thing that pacified me was she'd be back before long. I knew she needed the time to hang out with just my sisters.

Earlier this morning, Rosalie and Alice had insisted on having a girl's day out with Bella, and knowing that she hadn't spent much time with them lately, Bella had conceded.

I had no idea where they were going or what they were doing because they all had blocked their thoughts from me.

I couldn't help but feel awfully suspicious.

Even Bella hadn't told me, and she shared everything with me.

I'd find out before long; keeping secrets from me wasn't like her.

The only other positive thing about our impending separation was that I could spend some quality time alone with our daughter. With Jacob around so much, there weren't many times that Renesmee and I couldspend with just us. However, Jacob had some errands to run for his father today, and in any case, he'd already spent some time with her early in the morning, so I had her all to myself today.

Now that I thought about it, I was grateful for the opportunity I had been given today.

Renesmee wouldn't be a child for much longer.

I wanted to use all the time that I could.

Seven years wasn't long, and her childhood innocence wouldn't last forever.

So today while Bella was out with my sisters, I decided I would do whatever Renesmee wanted us to do, as long as it was safe.

Bella turned to me and smiled before giving me a quick but tender kiss and whispering in my ear, 'if you miss me at all today, then just think about tonight.'

When did I ever not?

The night was the very best part of my existence.

And my sexy wife knew very well why.

Often I wished that our activities of the night could continue into the day.

If Renesmee hadn't been conceived then perhaps that's what would've happened.

I nodded, a smirk present on my face. "Don't stay there any longer than you have to."

"I don't plan to, but Rose and Alice may have other ideas."

"Just say the word and I'll save you from whatever they plan to do to you."

She laughed.

"Tempting, but I have to decline. See you later."

"Bye mummy," Renesmee sang, giving her one last hug.

"Bye." I grinned at Bella.

She simply smiled at the both of us and then was gone.

…

"So what do you want to do today? I asked Renesmee as I followed her into her room and sat on her bed, outstretching my arms. She jumped straight into them, and sat herself on my knee.

Her brow furrowed in concentration and then her face became alight with joy. She lifted her hand up slightly in an invitation. Knowing her methods of speech better than most people, I leant my face into her hand. Even though I could read her mind, she preferred it this way. I did too; it made me feel like she was voluntarily letting me see into her head.

She was thinking of a book, one that Alice had given her last Christmas about poems. The page she was focused on was about limericks.

"Mummy read that to me last night. She said she'd teach me how to make a funny poem like in the book one day. Can you teach me instead Daddy?"

I smiled. "Of course. Who do you want the funny poem to be about?"

She deliberated for a second, cocking her head slightly to the side. "You, Daddy."

I suppressed a grin. "But there are no proper words that rhyme with my name. How about you choose someone else."

"Okay then, I choose…Alice!"

Alice would love this.

"Well to make a proper funny poem, you have to use words that rhyme with each-other. So what rhymes with Alice?" I asked.

My little girl was very intelligent, I'd let her figure this out on her own.

"Palace, Dallas and malice," she said confidently.

"That's great," I stated proudly. "Now which one sounds the most like your Aunt Alice?"

"Not malice…or Dallas …but she owns many clothes like a palace?"

"Now you could say, I have a nice aunt named Alice, she owns many clothes like a palace."

"What next?" she asked eagerly.

"What else makes you think of Aunt Alice? Or what is she like?"

"She dances like a fairy?"

"Great! Now what names with fairy?"

"Airy, hairy, scary and Mary."

"So here you could say, she dances like a fairy, her human name was Mary."

"Was it?" she asked with wonder.

I smiled. "That's a story for another time."

Her eyes widened but she dropped the subject.

"And what after that then?"

"Then you've only got one more line left. It's got to rhyme with the first line."

"And she and Uncle Jasper love Dallas," she said without hesitation.

"You should show this to Aunt Alice later, I'm sure she'll love it."

She fixed her serious brown eyes on me. "I really would've written one for you Daddy, but like you said, nothing rhymes with your name. I'll make something else for you. I promise!"

I smiled fondly. "I don't mind. Now do you want me to say the whole poem?"

"Yes!"

"I have a nice aunt named Alice.

She owns many clothes like a Palace

She dances like a fairy.

Her human name was Mary.

And she and Uncle Jasper love Dallas."

"Yay!"

I ruffled her hair. "See, you made a poem."

"You helped," she protested. "It's our poem now."

"What are you going to call it?"

"Daddy and Renesmee's poem?"

"Sure you don't want to name it something else?"

"I'm sure. I like that name."

I smiled yet again.

"How bout you write it down and decorate it with your coloured pencils," I suggested.

"Great idea, Daddy!" She wriggled herself effortlessly out of my arms and ran over to the white cupboard that stored her arty things.

As she rummaged through her possessions, I directed a few words to whoever the person 'up there' was, in my thoughts. I knew without a doubt that someone godly had created us. My exquisite wife and amazing daughter couldn't possibly have been fashioned from the earth alone.

They were too perfect.

The two words that I thought were simple. They explained everything I needed to say despite their scarcity.

Thank you.

* * *

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	6. Stages

**Stages  
**

**Challenge Number/Title: 6# The Inanimate Object POV**  
**Date Posted: 10/3/13**

**Fandom: Twilight**  
** Rating: T**  
** Genre: AH, HEA**  
** Content Descriptors: Friendship, romance and fluff**  
** Character Pairing: Edward and Bella**

**Summary: **Edward and Bella's whole life together, as told from the perspective of a painting in Bella's room. (If you have a problem with reading an inanimate object's POV then I suggest you pretend that the painting is a person. If you still have a problem with it then just skip to the next one-shot.)

* * *

I see everything that goes on in the Swan household.

Every day is nothing less than drama.

The day I first arrived here, when I was mounted on a wall in a room owned by the little girl of the family, I saw the girl in question, dressed in a red checkered dress with plaited pigtails and all, Isabella Swan, come home from somewhere crying. From what I gathered from her conversation with her mother, third grade (whatever _that_ is) wasn't what she wanted it to be, she had no friends and nobody liked her. Even I, an oil painting on the wall could see that despite her mother, Renee Swan's assurances, Renee was growing worried. I gathered from this that this happened often.

Thanks to this little girl, I had been bought from a charity store and taken here. She had pointed at me and whined until her mother had bought me. I have no idea what I look like, what made me appeal to this little girl so much that day, but I'm beyond thankful, for her room is more interesting to look at then the tedium of my old home.

Therefore, I feel inclined to watch over Isabella, not just because she is constantly around me and I have no one else to look at, but because I feel like I owe her.

Even when she doesn't speak aloud, I can still hear her.

I can read moods, and sometimes thoughts.

Some may feel skeptical about this, but if I'm an inanimate object and can think, then why can't I read people's thoughts and moods too?

Isabella's are very entertaining.

However I can't talk or communicate with her.

I don't have lips.

If I could, I would talk to her.

That, I know.

The next few days pass in the same fashion as the first.

Every day at three thirty PM, Isabella runs into the room, crying her eyes out and her mother trails after her, consoling her the best she can with kisses and hugs, looking more anxious each and every time. Once her mother leaves, Isabella chooses a novel from the mountainous pile of books on the desk by her bed, and begins reading, her tense face fading into one of tranquility.

I wonder what it's like to read.

Judging by Isabella's expression it must be the best thing in the world.

After that she gets starts writing down numbers with weird symbols that I don't understand in an exercise book, not even letting the call for food by her mother distract her. Once she has that done, she exits the room, and returns ten minutes later, still chewing the food she obviously had consumed, and then goes back to her book.

When Renee comes in and tells her that she has ten minutes before bedtime, she puts away her book, sticks her hand under the bed and pulls out a generic-looking spiral notebook. Taking a pen, she begins writing in a furious, almost illegible scrawl, and glares at the paper as if it is its fault she's so upset.

I'm glad I'm not that notebook.

I feel very sorry for the pain it has to go through, especially with how aggressively she pierces it with words.

However it can't talk and neither can I.

I watch as she goes to bed, and turns off the light.

The room is dark.

I see nothing.

Time seems to pass more quickly during the night, especially in darkness. I feel like I too am falling asleep, because it feels like mere seconds that light streams through the open window and Isabella's eyes flutter open. She groans, stretches her arms to the ceiling and then forces her-self out of bed. She seems more relaxed today, I wonder why.

For some strange reason, she doesn't begin to get dressed into the plain red-checkered dress as she usually does but instead takes the book she was reading yesterday from the shelf, and begins to lose herself in it.

I am sure an hour or two has passed.

Why has she not gone to the place that she usually goes to?

Perhaps she realizes how horrible it is and has decided to never go back.

I don't blame her.

Crying seems like a horrible thing.

Not that I would know, of course.

Isabella's mother walks in without warning five minutes later and this time her smile is hesitant, as if she's unsure about what she's about to do.

"Bella, I have two people I want you to meet."

Isabella – Bella – looks up from her book and stares at her fearfully.

"Who? It's not someone in my class is it?"

Renee's smile falters.

"No, you've never met these two people before. They've just moved from Chicago and are our new next door neighbors."

Bella's face brightens a little.

"Are they nice?"

"Very."

Something flashes in the little girl's eyes that I can't decipher.

"Are you sure they won't be mean to me too."

"Bella," she admonishes. "These people are two very polite and well-mannered people. I'm hoping you can even be friends with the little boy."

"Nobody in this world wants to be friends with me," she mutters bitterly, throwing her book to the floor and burying her face into her pillow. Renee is at her side at once, stroking her hair soothingly.

"People just don't understand you. Maybe this boy will."

"Promise?" She raises her head.

Although it pains Renee to rise her daughter's hopes up when they could be crushed, she says, "I promise."

"Are they here now?" she asks nervously.

"Yes, and they've been waiting a long time, so come on."

"Fine." She concedes, sitting up and then taking her mother's hand as she helps her get to her feet and leads her out of the room.

All is silent for about ten minutes.

I wish Bella or her mother would return.

Life is so much more interesting when they are around.

As if hearing my thoughts, Bella walks back into the room, but unlike I expect, she isn't alone.

Trailing timidly behind her is a little boy of around the same age. He has messy bronze hair, vivid green eyes and freckles dot across his nose. Like Bella, he wears a blue jacket, but his shirt is white and his jeans are black.

He looks uncertainly around him, taking a few awkward steps forward.

"You have a nice room," he says quietly.

Her voice is just minute. "Thanks."

If I could speak, I would do so, just to break the silence that formed. The tension was thicker than ever before.

"So…er…do you like Forks?" she asks, holding her arms to her chest as if she is expecting a rebuff.

"I haven't been here that long."

"Oh."

More silence follows.

They both look down.

Nobody speaks until Renee walks into the room with another woman who I assume to be the boy's mother. They both hold cups of coffee.

"How are you two going?" Renee asks them hopefully.

"Good," they both say at once.

The other woman smiles, her eyes crinkling. She has bronze curls and her features are kind. "That's good."

"Would you like something to eat or drink? " Renee says.

'No thank you," the boy says politely.

Bella simply shakes her head.

"I think we should leave them be," I hear the boy's mother whisper.

Renee nods and then they depart.

Bella and the boy look at each-other again.

Bella blushes.

The boy starts to play with the zipper on his jacket.

It irritates me more than ever that I can't move. Can't Bella see that the best thing is to do is talk? The awkwardness is more likely to disappear then.

"So do you like books?" The boy finally asks.

Bella's face lights up like the sun. "Oh yes, I love them."

"What books do you have?" he asks.

"Lots and lots!"

Her shyness seems to dissipate a little as she walks over to her bookshelf. The boy follows cautiously.

"See?"

He bends forward and begins to read the spines of the books.

His eyes widen and all of his reservations fade away as he spots a book of his liking.

"You have the _Deltora Quest_ books?"

"Yes, all of them. I love Emily Rodda's books."

He grinned, all of his shyness slipping away. "I do too."

"Oh my gosh, that's great!"

They then sit themselves on Bella's bed and begin to have an animated discussion about their favourite characters and about the twists and riddles in the book. By the end of it, both of them have not one trace of shyness in them.

"So besides books, what else do you like?" he asks her.

She deliberates for a few seconds, blushing when she realizes that she doesn't really like anything but books. "I don't know…movies?"

"What kind?" he asks eagerly, wanting to get to know at least someone in this town who seems cool.

She fidgets. "Disney movies."

He laughs. "I like those too."

"What's your favourite?"

"The Lion King."

"That's one's great, but I like Cinderella better."

I have no idea what Disney is, so it isn't exactly a surprise when I begin to zone out when their conversation about it surpasses the five minute mark.

What brings my undivided attention back to them, however, is when Bella asks the boy nervously if he wants to sit with her at recess at school.

I assume that school is the place that she comes home crying from every day.

I hope ardently that he will agree to be with her there. Perhaps then she will have a smile on her face when she gets back, a happy smile like the one she bears now.

He flushes. "I'm home-schooled."

Bella's face falls as she takes this in, and I wish, not for the first time, I could have arms so I could hug her. Hugs seem to make her feel better.

"Oh."

The disappointment in the one word she says is unmistakable.

"We can still be friends though," he says quickly. "You're really nice and cool, and I live next door, so we can play together all the time."

"You'd really be my friend?" she whispers.

He looks shocked. "Of course. That's only if you want to be my friend. I don't have many friends cause I move around a lot. My mum's an artist."

"It's just that not many people want to be my friend."

"Why?" he asks incredulously. "You're so nice and pretty."

She shrugs, looking down.

"Well I'm gonna be your friend. They're all stupid meanie heads anyway to not want to be friends with you."

She lets out a strange sound that is between a giggle and a sob.

"Thanks."

"So can I come over tomorrow then? I'll bring games and stuff, that way if we have nothing to talk about, we can just play the game. Sound okay?"

She smiles, wider than I've ever seen her do. "More than okay."

He grins back at her.

"Edward!" A feminine voice calls from somewhere in the house.

So the boy finally has a name then!

I wish I had a name…

His mother appears at the doorway, Renee behind her.

"It's time to go now, sweetie. We need to unpack more of the stuff in your room."

He looks unwillingly up at her. "Do we have to?"

"Yeah, does he have to?" Bella exclaims.

Renee and Edward's mother exchange a glance. "I'm afraid so."

"Can I come over here tomorrow Mum?" Edward asks hopefully.

"Now that's up to Bella's mum. What do you say?" She turns to Renee.

Not even needing to think about it, she says, "that'd be fine Elizabeth, around eleven AM then?"

Now Edward's mother has a name too!

I love learning new information.

"Come on Edward, you'll see Bella again tomorrow."

He jumps up immediately, runs over to his mother and takes her hand. "Bye Bella."

"Bye Edward." She waves.

Renee, Edward and his mother then walk out of the room.

Bella smiles even more widely as she launches herself onto her bed and grabs the spiral notebook from where it hides under her bed. This time when she writes in it, her handwriting is dainty and neat, portraying her mood.

Her smile still doesn't fade even when she lays down to go to sleep, and as the lights go out and I can no longer see, I am ninety nine point nine percent sure that she is still smiling.

…

Bella's smile is now a constant occurrence on her face.

It's there when she wakes up.

When she gets dressed and brushes her hair into it's usual straight generic do.

When she leaves the room.

When she comes back into the room.

When she begins to tidy her things and put certain objects away into her cupboard.

When the doorbell rings.

When she leaves the room and comes back with Edward.

Especially then.

They dive straight into their games straight away, playing a board-game Edward calls the 'Game of Life'.

I don't quite get the purpose of it but they seem to be having a lot of fun, so I'm content.

Their conversation flows easily and I can tell that they're past all forms of shyness now.

They talk about things that I know about and things that I don't.

I learn many more things than I hadn't known before.

Like how Bella is born in September while Edward is born in June.

That Edward's last name is Cullen.

And that school is a place where you get taught things to do with life.

I want to go there!

Observing isn't enough sometimes.

The biggest thing that I found out today, however, is that Edward doesn't have a father.

I don't know what it's like to have a mother or a father but Bella's mother seems like a good thing to have so I feel sorry for Edward when I hear this. His actual father left his mother when Edward was only a newborn.

Even though Edward is very cheerful as he tells Bella this, both Bella and I can hear the pain and slight anger in his voice.

Bella is quick to console him, glad to be the one helping someone else for the first time.

"I don't have a daddy either. But my Mum is great so it's okay. Mine died when I was two, in a car crash. My mum said he was a great Dad, but I guess I'll never know."

"We both won't, but I know we'll be okay."

"I will if you keep being my friend," Bella says. "Today's the best day I've ever had."

"Me too," he agrees.

She holds out her pinky. "Promise we won't ever stop being friends."

He twists his around hers immediately. "I promise."

They then go back to their game, talking about things that I don't understand.

I'm not physic or anything, but I have a weird feeling that this will be the first of many afternoons like this.

I also have a feeling that their promise will never be broken.

…

The following morning when Bella wakes up, I expect Edward to walk through the door before I can count to ten, but he doesn't.

Instead, Bella takes her time getting up, changes into her red-checkered dress and leaves the room.

Her smile is gone.

I think she's going to the place she hates so much.

The infamous school.

She doesn't return and I'm forced to stare at the other painting on the pink wall opposite me. Like me, he can't speak, but I can tell he's as transfixed by the Swan family as I am.

It's three-thirty PM and Bella still hasn't come home.

Four-thirty.

Five thirty.

Then finally at six thirty she walks through the door.

Edward is not with her.

But she has a big smile on her face.

Perhaps she went to his house after school.

I can't come up with another explanation that makes sense.

I have a feeling that this is going to happen a lot.

Either that, or Edward is going to be here very often.

Life is about to get a whole lot more interesting for me.

Or at least it is for Bella.

That, I am sure of.

…

I must be physic.

Like I predicted, I see Edward almost as much as I see Bella.

And when I don't see him, Bella's either asleep or writing down equations.

Or she's not there altogether.

I haven't seen Bella cry in weeks.

Renee no longer looks anxious.

She looks satisfied.

Each day I see Bella and Edward grow closer and closer.

One day they're giving tentative hugs, the next they're making up a secret handshake.

Some days they just talk.

In others they make up creative stories together and role-play famous books that they love.

Sometimes I feel like they know I can see and hear everything they say and do, because sometimes when they talk to each-other, they whisper into each-others ears and I can't make out anything they're saying. From the way they giggle afterwards, I assume it's something that I wouldn't understand anyway.

A few months later and they have progressed to being 'best friends.'

I have no idea what this means, but Edward calls Bella it often, and by the way that she beams every time he calls her it, I know it's good.

_8 years later_

Eight years have passed.

Its passage was quick.

Many things have changed, however.

Bella is taller now, thinner, her face more narrow. She talks more eloquently now, but swears frequently too. Instead of dresses, she wears jeans and converse, and her hair is always loose. Her toys are gone, but there are ten times more books than before.

Edward is still her only friend.

He has changed to the extreme, also.

Like Bella he is tall, but his height surpasses hers. His voice is deep now, his stride confident. The only physical traits that remain are his green eyes and his messy bronze hair.

He is…handsome.

There is no other word for it.

I have a feeling Bella thinks so too.

She sneaks glances at him when she thinks he's not looking.

But then again, so does he.

They'd been doing this since they were thirteen.

And neither of them realize.

I wish they would do something about it.

The sexual tension in the air is beginning to irritate me.

However, attracted or not, Bella and Edward have always stuck together during these eight years.

Nothing in the world can separate them.

Not sickness.

Not going to different types of schools.

Not even having a fight.

They haven't even fought yet.

They seem to agree on everything!

Currently, they are in sophomore year now at Forks High.

Yes, Edward too.

To Bella and Edward's uttermost excitement, Elizabeth decided that Edward needed to spend his final years of high school in a normal school, so that when he entered his senior year, he wouldn't be overwhelmed by how different school was to home.

They threw a party that day.

There was food.

There were promises.

There was joy.

I remember being very happy then, thinking that Bella wasn't going to be alone at school any more.

…

Today is their first day.

I know so, because Bella dons a hideous looking green dress that resembles a tablecloth, and slings a backpack over her shoulder.

Her face gives it away too.

It's a mixture of fear, but also of anticipation.

I know Edward is waiting for her outside.

I hear his voice.

He's telling her to hurry.

She does so as quickly as she can manage and then is out the door.

…

It isn't hard to guess when Bella arrives home that she no longer hates school. She merely tolerates it now. Edward has made all the difference.

…

Now when Bella writes down equations, Edward does them with her too. They write down other things too, big slabs of text that I can't read.

Bella seems to enjoy doing this now, but only when Edward does it with her.

She doesn't care that it takes her twice as long to do them.

Edward is a big procrastinator.

He brings up things like video games and books.

She doesn't seem to care.

She gets him on track eventually.

…

It is April.

Bella comes home at three thirty today.

However, Edward doesn't.

She doesn't seem to be upset, but the stressed lines in her face suggest otherwise.

She's worried.

I know it's to do with Edward.

She preoccupies herself in a book as usual but she seems more distracted then she usually is, looking furtively around the room every time she finishes a page.

She goes to bed early.

I wish I knew what was wrong.

…

The next day it's the same.

Then the next.

Then the next.

Then finally, a change occurs.

The day starts out as usual, but she doesn't return at three.

I wrongly interpret this as good news.

It's four o clock and Bella's not back yet. I assume she's at Edward's. But then she runs through the door, tears streaking down her flushed cheeks and I know something terrible has happened.

It's like the old days again, except now she's not just upset.

She's mad too.

Extremely mad.

I cop a slight injury when she throws one of her books at me, but besides being slightly lopsided, I'm fine. She screams at nobody in particular and punches the door several times. Her fists turn red, and it's obvious that she's in a lot of pain, but she's beyond noticing. Her mother comes in to calm her but she screams for her to go away.

Renee looks shocked.

But then she mutters something about how her baby is a hormonal teenager and leaves her alone.

Bella doesn't calm down, even later that night as she tries to go to sleep.

Even in the dark, her muffled sobs can be heard.

…

The next day when Bella comes home from school, Edward is with her.

They are both tense, not looking directly at each-other.

Edward looks uncomfortable to be in Bella's presence for the first time since they've met.

It's not long before I discover why she was so upset the day before.

Their behavior says it all.

Edward and Bella are having a fight.

And when I find out what it's about, I'm taken by surprise.

I don't know why what they're fighting about it such a big deal.

Edward's just made two new friends.

I don't know why this is a bad thing.

I thought friends were good.

I thought friends made people happy.

His new friend is a boy.

And also a girl.

I think only the latter matters to Bella.

Offensive words are shared and glares are delivered.

"You said I'd always be your friend. Now you hang out with Jasper and Alice all the time," she yells.

"I said you could hang out with us too, but you didn't."

"You know Jasper hates me. How could you?" A sob escapes.

"I'm allowed to make other friends too!"

"You know how much they hate me, all of his gang. You know what they call me. Yet you become friends with them. I thought you were my best friend!"

"I am, but you're being fucking ridiculous! This argument is so stupid."

"Stupid!" she screamed. "How would you like to be pushed around every day, to be called…a…a nobody, a loser, a retard. I had to sit alone today in every single class, and not to mention during recess and lunch. It was just like before!"

"That's not my fault. Not everybody has to like you. It's impossible for everybody to like everybody. I told Jasper to stop calling you those things but he didn't listen. You could've sat with us at any time."

"You know very well that you're my only friend, and the reason _why _I can't sit with them. Are you going to choose them over me…because they're cooler?"

"I never said that," he snarled. "I just needed to talk to them about something."

"What? For three days? When did this all start? You used to say daily that you wanted to kick Jasper's ass, and now you're hanging out with him and Alice 24/7." Her eyes darkened with anguish as she realized something. "Wait, you like Alice don't you? As in you have a crush on her? That's why you're trying to be friends with them!"

"No! Stop twisting my words! Alice is just a nice person and I'm allowed to be friends with whoever I want anyway!"

"I never said you couldn't."

"Maybe some of that stuff he said was true," he mutters impulsively.

Bella's eyes fill with tears and she brushes them away furiously with the back of her hand.

"Go, just get out. If that's what you think then leave!" she yells.

His face turns apologetic and remorse pools in his eyes as he realizes what he said.

"I…I didn't mean that."

"Like hell you didn't. Leave, please."

"Bella…"

"Go!"

"Fine then!" he snaps, stalking out of the room before slamming the door shut.

Bella falls to her knees and begins to sob into her hands, her cries loud and raspy.

What just happened?

I'm so confused.

How could eight years of friendship be jeopardized because of this one disagreement?

How could they let this happen?

Bella's mother walks in, and for the first time, Bella doesn't send her away. Instead, she more or less collapses into her motherly embrace and begins to cry into her shoulder. Renee pats her back and murmurs soothing words, but her face betrays her bewilderment.

She's as confused as me.

"What happened?" she asks.

Bella shakes her head, unable to speak.

"You'll feel a lot better if you tell me, sweetie."

"I just want to go to sleep and never wake up," she mumbled.

"We all do sometimes, but I'm sure this problem you and Edward are having can be fixed."

"No it can't!"

"Why not?"

"Because other people have gotten in the way. They've ruined everything!"

"What do you mean?"

Bella sighs. "It's going to sound really stupid."

"Nothing that makes you this upset is going to sound stupid," she assures.

"It's really childish but I think I have a right to be upset."

Renee waited.

"Edward's replaced me," she finally admitted. "And with the worst people possible."

"I don't…understand."

"He hangs out with Jasper Hale now and Alice Brandon, instead of me."

"Jasper Hale as in…" Renee trailed off in horror.

"Yes, the guy who wrote the word 'worthless bitch' on almost every single page of my copy of Wuthering Heights," Bella said bitterly, her voice choking up in places. "Who, cut a chunk out of my hair with scissors, who rammed my head into a brick wall, who got everyone to sign a petition that said I was the ugliest person in the school…I could go on but I won't."

"Why on earth would Edward do such a thing? I thought he hated him as much as you do?"

"I think he likes Alice," she whispered. Tears trickled down her cheeks, not of her own accord, and along with the pain and betrayal she felt, she also felt an irrepressible wave of fury surge inside of her at the thought of the Alice girl talking to Edward.

Her mind, a curse with the intent of torturing her, brought images to the fore-front of her mind that made her want to cry until her tears ran dry, and kill every living thing in sight.

_Alice and Edward laughing over some private joke. _

_Edward comforting Alice with his embrace after she'd had a bad day._

_Alice and Edward cuddling together on a single armchair in Edward's house even though there was only space for one. _

_Edward and Alice _kissing _..._

This pain and fury Bella felt surpassed even the absolute detestation she felt for Jasper.

Somehow, even though Alice hadn't done anything directly to her yet, she hated her more than she hated Jasper. She wished for Alice to be sent to the fiery pits of hell and to burn there for eternity, she desired to slap Alice's pretty little face until it bled, and to pull out her hair until it fell out in clumps and she grew bald.

She longed to scream in Alice's face to stay the hell away from Edward.

Even though Bella didn't realize what her reaction meant, Renee seemed to. Despite the situation, she looked to be repressing a smile.

"How do you know?" Renee asks.

"It just makes sense, and now I've lost Edward over it. I hate the stupid bitch!"

Given the circumstances, Renee doesn't bat an eye at Bella's inappropriate use of the English language.

"I doubt you've lost Edward over it. You were bound to have a fight sometime."

"But he likes Alice now. There's no way he'd rather hang out with me than her."

"You're his best friend. He'll come around."

"What if he doesn't?" Bella asks desperately. "I'll have to face another three years of complete misery. I thought I was over this."

"You are, and I know Edward. He'll realize how much this hurts you and he'll apologise and make it up to you."

"Are you being serious?"

Renee smiled. "Yes, but for now, you have to give him some time."

…

By the late hours of the night, when all lights are out and Bella is seeking sleep, I'm relieved to see that her desolation has diminished a little, and her hysterics have all but vanished. However, her features still betray the extent of her hurt, and the way she tosses and turns throughout the night portrays her troubled state.

I wonder what is most worrying her?

She certainly has to have a lot on her mind.

She's going to have a lot of things that she's going to have to face tomorrow.

I'm glad I'm not human; I wouldn't know how to deal with it all.

I hope with all of my being that Edward and Bella will reconcile.

Although they don't see it, they need each-other more than they know.

When I think of one, it is impossible not to think of the other.

They are two halves of the same whole.

Why can't this Alice girl see that?

Or this Jasper guy?

Is it not as obvious to everyone else as it is to me?

The rattling of something to my right stops my thought process.

It is the window.

It creaks, an eerie, horrible sound that makes Bella shiver in her sleep.

Suddenly it slides open, and into the room, slips Edward.

He looks unsure of what he's doing and he glances furtively back where he came. Then he stares at Bella's sleeping form and his face softens.

He's made his decision.

He twists back around slowly to shut the window and jumps when he hears Bella shriek.

"What the hell are you doing here?" she exclaims, sitting up and unconsciously pulling her quilt cover higher above her chest.

"Er…Uh…I wanted to talk to you," he said.

For the first time in his teenage life, he doesn't seem confident.

"In the middle of the night?"

"My thoughts kept me up and I had to talk to you."

"Mine did too," she admits. "But is this really necessary? What if my Mum comes in?"

"Look, I didn't mean any of it, really."

"Why did you say it then?" she challenges.

"I was angry, confused…I guess I really didn't think, and I'm sorry."

"I'm sorry too," she whispers.

Edward and I both know that she's not referring to flipping out about his new friends.

He sighs. "Look, I value our friendship too much to lose it over being friends with two people who aren't as great as you. If you really have a problem with it then I'll stay away from them."

Bella's stomach churns with guilt and as much as she hates Alice and Jasper, she can't be this selfish. "You don't have to do that. I was just being a jealous bitch. I just don't want you to totally forget about me."

"That's impossible," he disagreed.

"Well you have been for the last few days."

"I'm sorry," he says again. "I swear on my life that I'll make it up to you. I won't hang out with them anymore, I promise."

"But what about Alice? I thought you liked her?" she whispers bewilderedly.

"Liked her as in…" He laughs. "No way. She's not my type. I told you that."

"You didn't exactly deny it…so you really don't like her then?"

"Of course not."

Relief, so powerful and encompassing that it almost knocks the breath out of her, sweeps through her entire body and she feels ever fiber of her being relax.

Edward doesn't like Alice…

The visions that she had seen would never come to be…

So this meant…

"Who _is _your type then?" Bella asks curiously.

He flushes, looks down and refuses to meet her eye.

"Come on," she persisted. "Tell me."

His brow furrows and indecision flickers across his face.

One minute passes.

Then another.

And then his face smoothes out and determination takes its place.

He kneels by her bedside and takes her hand in his.

He's done this before but it has never felt this intimate.

When he speaks, she can tell he's speaking from his soul.

"There's no such thing as my perfect type, that suggests that there's more than one person who's perfect for me. That's complete bullshit. There's only one girl who's perfect for me, and I've already met her. Nothing can compare to her."

"Oh," Bella whispers, her heart sinking to rock bottom.

Instead of being angry that he likes someone, she feels merely sad.

He doesn't stop there.

"She's beautiful in a simple way, not an obvious way, but despite that, her beauty rivals that of any model. She lights up the room when she walks into it, her smile makes me feel like there's no gravity and she makes me happy without even trying. In honest truth, she's everything that I could ever ask for. There's nothing I would detract nor add to her if I could. She's smart, more so than me, funny, cool, and most importantly, she's in sync with me, in whatever I do. I can be myself with her. I can act like an idiot and she doesn't see me like one. I think…I think I'm in love with her."

"Does she know?" Bella chokes, a few tears slipping down her cheeks despite her effort of preventing them.

He loves someone else…

Not her…

She knows she loves him now.

It's the only thing that makes any fucking sense any more.

It's the only thing that explains the insatiable, growing agony taking root in her chest, and the emotional tumult her mind is in.

But it's too late.

His heart has already been stolen.

He smiles, not sensing any of this. "She should by now, I've been so obvious, but I think she misunderstood. I needed someone to talk to about how I felt to see if it was real and if she liked me back. Alice Brandon is the school's official relationship guru, but apparently only the popular kids know about her. I only found out because I overheard Jasper talking about her 'awesome' skills during Geography to his friends.

So I went to her, paid a fucking ridiculous amount of money, and listened to her crap. Even though it was crap, it was still interesting to hear, so I stayed, but we kept running out of time for what she needed to say, so I needed to go back the next day and then the next. In the end, it was the fight that we had that made me realize what I'm feeling is real, not Alice's crappy teachings."

"What's our fight got to do with this?" she asks quietly.

"Everything."

"I don't understand…"

"I can't believe that you haven't guessed it by now."

"What?"

"Bella, she's you."

"Who's me?"

"The girl who I love. She's you. I love _you_."

"What? But…that doesn't make any sense," she says, dazed.

All of her desolation fades away and is replaced with complete and utter confusion.

"Why is it impossible?" he demands. "Is it because I'm only a friend to you?"

At his incredulity, Bella's breaking point is reached, and she begins to cry. Tears rush down her face in a sudden deluge and she doesn't even protest when Edward stands up and sits on the edge of the bed, throws the quilt cover off her and takes her into his arms.

"Why?" he says eventually, softly.

"Because…because you said she's beautiful…and I'm not."

"You're more beautiful than anybody else is to me. How can you not be?"

"But…but my clothes are baggy and my hair is dull. All I do is brush it in the morning; I don't do anything else with it like other girls do. I don't paint my nails, I'm paler than death itself and my eyes look black when they're not in direct sunlight. How can you think I'm beautiful?"

"You're thinking of superficial beauty. You have natural beauty, and that's the best kind. You're also beautiful on the inside, which is most important."

"So I really am her?" she asks.

He smiles. "Yes.

"Promise?"

She holds out her pinky.

It's a tradition of theirs.

"I know a better way," he says mysteriously, positing her legs so she's straddling him.

She simply stares at him, not comprehending.

Then he leans forward and kisses her.

His kiss is slow and tender, reflective of how he feels.

He's never kissed anyone before so he doesn't know if he's doing it right.

It's a lot different from what he expects, more wet and loud than he thought it would be.

But he finds it a pleasant experience.

And so does she.

She doesn't know what she's doing either.

Her thoughts mirror his.

When she kisses him back, she's relieved that he doesn't pull back and wipe away her kiss with disgust.

She hopes that her kissing skills don't suck.

She hopes that he's enjoying it too.

They kiss for about thirty seconds before they run out of air and are forced to part.

Both of them bear massive grins.

Bella only has one thing to say.

"Why the hell didn't you tell me years ago?"

He laughs.

_8 years later_

Everything's being packed into boxes.

I'm dreading the time where I will be too.

I think Bella is going somewhere again.

The last time she went somewhere, she didn't come back for four years.

I still don't get what the point of her prolonged absence was.

All she received from going on that trip was a diploma and a weird black robe.

Edward did too.

And now she's going somewhere again.

I think she's taking me with her this time.

She's taking everything else.

The walls are almost as bare as the room is.

Like last time, Edward and Renee help her pack away her things into the cardboard boxes that litter her room and chat about trivial things.

Often, more so than usual, Bella glances down at the sparkling diamond ring on the third finger of her left hand and smiles.

I think her new piece of jewelry is very beautiful but I don't know what it means.

I know it has to mean something however, considering her reaction when she received it.

She hasn't taken it off since Edward presented it to her a few months ago.

He seems really satisfied to see it there, as if he's been waiting to place it on her finger his whole life.

Perhaps he has.

Bella's been really busy the past few weeks.

Either she's out somewhere or is talking on the phone, speaking excitedly to some one – a different person each time – about some big event that she's planning to throw.

Bella is no longer a child.

She can hold her own now, she even has her own job – Edward and Renee call her a physiologist, I don't know what that is but it sounds professional – and she always seems in control.

She's no longer that crying, emotionally unstable girl I used to know, but a grown woman.

I can see that she's ready for whatever she's about to do.

The person who comes over almost as often as Edward does is Alice.

Yes, Alice Brandon.

I have no idea what happened there.

All I know is that she went to a strange place for four years, and came back with Edward holding one hand, and Alice's arm looped through her arm.

They seem to be really good friends now.

There is never any hostility or mention of the past.

It's like it never happened.

They do all kinds of things together.

Especially things that result in Bella coming back home with many bags filled with clothes.

On the outside, Bella acts like she hates the whole thing.

But the most aftermath of their most recent trip told me otherwise.

That time they'd brought home a puffy, white, strapless dress with matching high-heeled shoes and a long veil that kissed the floor.

Bella had complained and grumbled when Alice forced her to try it on and had put on a sour expression when she'd modeled it for her in front of her mirror, but when Alice had left, she'd stood there in front of the mirror, simply thinking for a second, before putting it back on and grinning at her reflection, shifting from side to side and smoothing out the material. Her expression grew absent and I could tell from the tenor of her thoughts that she was imagining the day when she'd get to wear this dress, and the look on Edward's face when he saw her. She twirled a strand of her brown hair a little with her finger and let a very un-Bella-like giggle escape her lips.

She hadn't put the dress on since then but I could tell that she's been dying to.

I was jostled from my recollections of the past when I felt myself being moved slightly by two hands.

Renee is going to move me!

I'm the only thing left to put away.

I suppose I should be excited, this means that I'm about to be greeted with new scenery after years of just the same old room.

To be honest, I'm a little scared.

"I know just where do put that in our new apartment," Bella tells Edward confidently, squeezing his hand as they sit on the bed. "Be careful with it Mum. It's pretty old."

"I'm being careful," Renee mutters, ignoring Edward's chuckle.

"Are you taking everything with you?" Edward teases. "I don't think all this stuff will fit."

Bella elbows him in the ribs. "Hey! You're taking a lot of crap with you too."

"Soon it will be your stuff too."

She grinned. "I know. I can't wait to be Mrs. Cullen."

"Tomorrow seems so far away."

"It will be here before you know it," Renee warned the both of them, rolling her eyes. "And before you know it you'll have ten kids."

They both laughed.

"Sorry, but that's not going to happen, right Edward?" Bella asked.

"Right." He grins at her. "Sorry Renee, but you're only getting three grandkids max."

She shrugged, wrapping me up in a plastic covering and placing me carefully into the box.

"We'll see."

…

All is black for a very long time.

I hope Bella won't forget about me.

I want very badly to see how their lives play out, not to be plagued with this incessant darkness.

But still, darkness follows…

…

Suddenly, in what feels like decades but in actuality is two days, the box is opened and I am lifted out of my prison.

Light almost blinds me, but I don't care.

I'm too fascinated by my surroundings.

I'm in a room in which the main purpose of it seems to be entertainment. There is a black leather sofa, a coffee table, a massive flat-screen TV and a cabinet full of movies.

I wonder where Bella's books are…

Perhaps they have a room of their own.

I'm mounted on a wall above the recliner and can see pretty much everything that goes on in the room.

This is the perfect spot!

Judging by the empty boxes below me, I'm the last object to be placed, and Bella and Edward seem to realize this, as they sit down on the sofa together and lean back against it, sighing in relief. He wraps his arm around her shoulder and she snuggles into his side.

"I can't believe we're married. It all went so quick!" Bella murmurs.

"I know, which is why I thought I'd show you this." Edward smiles, grabbing the TV remote and pressing a particular button.

Bella's eyes widen and then she grins as she realises what he's showing her.

It's the video of the event that they'd been planning for months.

Everyone looked to be sitting in some sort of a building, one with pews and stained glass windows.

Bella looked radiant in her stunning white gown and even the red roses she held in her hands couldn't rival her beauty. Everyone turned to stare at her as she walked slowly down the red-carpeted aisle, and although she blushed a little at that fact, it looked as if nothing could destroy the ecstasy she was in.

Edward waited at the other side, wearing a black tuxedo and looking as equally exultant as Bella, except instead of looking nervous, he was grinning, an ear-splitting smile that trumped anybody's in the building.

When Bella reached him, it seemed that everything fit together, that they'd been born for the purpose of taking part in this one ceremony.

I could see why this event was so important now.

A man in a grey suit stood in front of the both of them and asked them to promise certain things to each-other, things that I knew Bella and Edward already abided by without this official recognition. It seemed that an official recognition made all the difference however, as tears began to fill Bella's eyes half way through the vows.

The man announced that they could kiss, and then they did so tenderly, receiving plenty of awwws from the captivated crowd.

The video then flashes to a much bigger room, one much more extravagant and lively. This one has an empty colossal wooden space in the centre of the room, and little tables filled with people, which border it, and a long table at the front, which Bella and Edward sit at, along with a few other people. I recognize Alice, but I don't know the others.

Suddenly they all raise their glasses up and murmur the same words.

"To Mr. and Mrs. Cullen."

Everyone drinks a sip of their champagne and then puts it down and begins clapping.

The remainder of the video is of people dancing on the previously empty space in the middle of the room, Edward and Bella cutting an extravagant cake and people saying their own private congratulations to the couple.

The word wedding is mentioned a lot.

Perhaps that's what this is.

The video goes black as it finishes and Bella yawns and lets her eyes flutter closed, causing Edward to chuckle.

"You can't tell me you're tired."

"A little," she murmurs.

"Too tired to have a repeat of last night?" he asks slyly, kissing up and down the side of her neck.

Her eyes snap open and she's sitting upright at once, a soft moan escaping her.

He laughs.

"Definitely not that tired," she tells him, running her hand up his chest.

They get up from the couch and walk into a room opposite me without another word. All I can see from here is that there's a bed and a dresser in there. The door shuts and I'm alone again.

It's not long before I hear noises.

Strange, foreign noises.

There have always been a countless number of things I've wanted to discover about this world but for the first time in my life, I think I'm okay with not knowing this one.

…

The next morning, Bella and Edward have their bags packed and they're leaving again.

I don't see them for another month.

…

When they finally return from their trip, they have more luggage than they left with and their skin is darker.

They look exhausted but smiles are still present on their faces.

Like they did after their wedding, they look at pictures of the place they'd just gotten back from.

It's a tropical location with plenty of beaches and things to look at.

They even bought little replicas of the things they saw, like small statues.

Not only that, but they brought a new companion.

It's a little, brown, fluffy thing that won't stop barking and who chews on everything in sight.

They call it Seth.

I call it annoying.

However they both dote on him like he's one of their own, and give him whatever he wants.

I find out how he came to join the family in a simple phone conversation.

Bella had rung up to Renee to let her know that she was home safely.

"_Hey Mum. How are you?"_

_Bella listens intently. _

"_Yeah, Rio was great. We even brought a little someone along with us."_

_She chuckles._

"_No Mum, I'm not pregnant. How could I even know at this point? Anyway we got a dog."_

_She pauses._

"_Yes, a stray. Don't worry, we got him checked out and he doesn't have any diseases or anything. He was just so cute, and he seemed to really like Edward and me, and you know I always wanted a dog…"_

"_Yeah, you can come over tonight, that's fine."_

_She smiles. _

"_Alright, bye."_

When Renee, Elizabeth and Alice come over, they're as infatuated with the dog as Edward and Bella are.

I really don't understand it.

I guess it's better than a baby though.

From what I can see from the TV that Bella and Edward sometimes watch, they look pretty damn irritating.

I hope they never get one of those.

_8 years later_

If one peeked through the window in the living room of the Cullen household eight years ago and compared it to how it looks now, they probably wouldn't be able to point out many differences. Yes, the DVD collection has grown, yes children's toys now litter the floor, and yes, the carpet has some stains in it that didn't exist before, but the thing that has changed the most of all in those eight years is not the room, but the people in it.

Edward and Bella are still as in love with each-other as they have been since they were children but they don't have as much time for each-other as they used to.

The birth of their daughter Renesmee gradually stole away those hours.

But despite this, they use what time they can, and even an imbecile can tell that they care about their daughter and each-other more than life itself.

Renesmee is four, a precious age, one of many tantrums and whining, and gets into mischief more so than Bella ever did when she was a child. Like her father and grandmother she has bronze hair, except it's curly and her eyes are chocolate brown like her mother's. She loves to make a mess, but is a sucker for bribery, which is how her parents keep her under control. I don't blame her. Some of the things that she gets have the same effect that giving a toddler free reign of Toys R Us would do.

Bella and Edward decided a year ago that what she needs is a sibling, so she could learn to share and make friends.

Which is why Bella is currently eight months pregnant.

Renesmee and Edward often rub Bella's belly and talk to it.

For now they call it the Bubba.

I think 'bubba' is short term for baby.

From when Renesmee was conceived, I learnt that, that's where the baby hides until it's ready to come out.

It's the only theory that makes sense, anyway.

Seth is also still a big part of the family.

Renesmee wasn't a big fan of him until she learned how to walk; and then they became the best of friends because she could chase him around the house and tug on his tail.

Sitting on the sofa and cuddling as they often do when Renesmee is asleep, Bella pats her belly and sighs as Edward kisses her forehead. "I just want this baby to come already. I wonder if it's a boy or a girl."

"You know what I think, and I'm going to be right," Edward says confidently.

Bella rolls her eyes. "It probably won't be a boy just because you keep saying it's going to be."

"You're the one who didn't want to find out the gender."

"You didn't either."

"I know I didn't." He smiles. "It's going to make the moment all that more special."

"Exactly," she agrees.

It isn't long before Bella falls asleep in Edward's arms. Pregnancy makes her ten times more tired that she usually is, which is why she's taken a few months of work off.

He smiles softly down at her sleeping form and brushes the hair out of her eyes.

He's just about to fall asleep himself when Renesmee bounds into the room, tears running down her cheeks.

"What is it, Ness," he whispers, resting Bella's limp form gently against the recliner and hugging Renesmee tightly to his chest.

Her big brown eyes stare seriously into his.

"You're not gonna die are you, Daddy?" she asks, clutching at his shirt.

"No, of course not," he tells her, shocked.

Where the hell did she get an idea like this from?

Edward not existing would be like…the world has stopped.

Because without Edward and Bella, I would simply just exist, not observe like I do, how could this little girl suggest such a thing?

"But you did in my dream." She sobbed. "And Claire's daddy died last year, so what's stopping you from dying? Please don't die Daddy, I need you and Mummy needs you and the Bubba needs you!"

"Renesmee sweetie, I'm not going to die, you just had a nightmare," he tells her softly.

She hugs him more tightly and refuses to let him ago. "Do you promise you won't die?"

Even though it pains him to do so, he promises his little girl that he won't leave her.

He knows he has no control over his mortality.

He just hopes that whoever's up there isn't heartless and cruel.

…

It isn't long before Renesmee's dream is long forgotten by its recipient. Edward doesn't tell Bella about it, not wanting to stress her out with unnecessary information, but their daughter's dream bothers him more than he lets on.

For the first time in his life, he's scared that he might be forced to break his promise; that he'll have to leave his wife and children.

Nothing frightens him more.

…

Two weeks to the day, in the middle of the night, Bella and Edward rush into the living room, already dressed, and ready to leave. Bella clutches her stomach and pants, yet she still manages a smile, and Edward looks panicked. Renee greets them at the door and then they're gone.

While she's here, Renee sits down and watches TV, but seems nervous for some reason, her hand always hovering over her mobile phone.

It's a few hours before it rings, however, and when it does, Renee physically jumps up in shock and then reaches for it more quickly than I have ever seen anybody move.

Pressing it to her ear, she says, "Did she have it?"

And then she smiles and I know Bella has had the baby.

"A boy," she whispers.

She begins to cry when she learns what they called him.

…

On May twenty fifth, two thousand and thirteen at eleven AM, Charlie John Cullen is brought home, a tiny, adorable bundle of joy. I take an instant liking to him because he is much quieter than Renesmee was when she was born. I find out that he is named after Bella's deceased father in an honor to his memory when Renee begins sobbing about how her husband would've loved little Charlie.

Like everyone else, Seth seems very interested in the new addition to the family but because of how big he is now, he isn't allowed anywhere near him.

Renesmee keeps him company though, scratching his fur and playing fetch with him outside.

She knows she'll have plenty of time to spend with Charlie later after everyone has left.

"He's the most perfect son we could ever ask for," Bella whispers to Edward later that night as she cradles Charlie in her arms. "And he looks just like you with his green eyes."

"So he does," Edward murmurs, kissing his son's, and then his wife's forehead softly.

"Soon you'll get to teach him how to play soccer, and I'll teach him how to read and we can teach him to ride a bike."

He smiled. "You're thinking a bit too far ahead, love."

"Well look at Renesmee."

He sighed. "Fair point. Before we know it, she'll be finishing school."

"She hasn't even started yet,"

"Exactly, but she will next year."

"I love how our life has turned out."

He smiled. "I love you, that's all there is to it."

She grinned and then they went to bed.

In another eight years, I know they'll be as happy as they are now.

Maybe they'll get another dog, or another baby in that time period.

Either way, their love will never cease.

I am content.

* * *

**If you liked this strange one-shot then please review :)  
**


	7. Opposites Attract

**Opposites Attract**

**Challenge Number/Title: 7# Valentines Day Loos**  
**Date Posted: 16/3/13**

**Fandom: Twilight**  
** Rating: T**  
** Genre: AH, HEA**  
** Content Descriptors: Romance**, **hurt/comfort**  
** Character Pairing: Edward and Bella**

**Betas: Chandrakanta and bexie25**

**Summary: Being locked in a bathroom with a hot girl sounds like the best thing that could ever happen to a guy like Edward, and it would've been had said girl not kicked him in the balls ten minutes earlier. Edward has a lot to learn about the elusive Bella Swan and she sure as hell is not going to make it easy for him.  
**

* * *

Where was the motherfucker?

I was going to kill Jasper!

I didn't even want to be at Alice Brandon's lame ass Valentine's Day party, yet here I was.

I fucking hated high school parties, and the commercial day even more so.

The two combined made me want to vomit.

He only wanted me to come along because he was a pussy and didn't want to look like a retard by showing up alone.

I'd only conceded because I owed him after he'd saved my ass from getting caught smoking on the school grounds.

Oh, I'd been caught plenty of times before, but I was one cigarette away from being suspended.

My parents were so infuriatingly strict about my senior year, even if I didn't give two fucks, and if I messed it up, it meant no Volvo CS3 for me.

I loved my damn car—it was the only way I could escape the shit hole I lived in whenever I felt like it.

So here I was at this stupid party, drinking cheap, foul-tasting beer by the doorway and glaring at anyone who had the balls to look at me.

Jasper only wanted to go to the party because he wanted to fuck its host.

Once he got what he came for, we'd be straight out the door.

He couldn't be much longer…

He'd walked off with the Brandon chick fifteen minutes ago, his smugness detectable from a mile away, and I hadn't seen him since.

Perhaps he'd gotten his wish.

At least one of us had.

My only wish was to get out of this fucking party.

It didn't look like that'd be happening any time soon.

On the brink of complete and utter boredom, I decided to scan the boisterous crowd of drunk teenagers for some eye-candy.

No girl caught my eye.

They were all unattractively fake in their appearance or plain to the extreme.

Fuck my life.

There were no hot girls, no good-quality booze, and instead of the hardcore rock I generally listened to, there was stupid pop music.

Scowling, I swallowed the last of the beer in my cup and let it slip from my fingers until it hit the floor.

There was no way in hell I was desperate enough to get a refill.

I'd sooner drink water straight from their tap.

Maybe they'd hidden the real stuff upstairs…

I buried my hand into the pocket of my jeans and felt for my phone so I could check the time, but encountered a rectangular box I knew better than my phone itself, first.

There's my solution!

Finally, I had something to occupy me until the horny bastard came back.

I pulled out the packet of cigarettes and stalked outside, groaning when I noticed how many people were sucking face out there.

I hated smoking in front of people; most bystanders sent dirty looks my way when I did, and I wanted to take a drag in peace.

I also hated having to awkwardly stand by and watch people make-out.

This was definitely not where I needed to be right now.

Not caring the slightest bit if the Brandon bitch had a problem with me smoking inside her house, I walked back inside and manoeuvred myself between the throng of people until I'd reached the stairs. Once I'd climbed up them, I began listening outside the doors of rooms to see if they were taken.

All of the rooms I'd checked so far were occupied, the loud moans I heard when I listened in, enlightening me on why I shouldn't open the door.

Eventually I came to a promising, prim little bathroom that looked like it'd been designed by a woman, and a girly one at that. I felt like puking just from catching a glimpse of the pink walls and furry, purple toilet seat cover, but the sight of the actual toilet actually made me feel the relentless need to piss.

Kicking the door shut with the back of my shoe once I'd walked inside, I slipped the packet of cigarettes back into my pocket and walked over to the toilet, but was stopped in my tracks when I noticed someone sitting by it.

It was a girl, one that I recognised from school but had never talked to.

The only reason I remembered her was because of her distinctive clothing and make-up choice.

She was what some may call an emo chick, or a Goth.

I surveyed her, curious as to why a person like her was at a party like this.

At first sight, the majority of her features were quite plain.

Her hair was a dull brown, long and generic, but frenzied streaks of red raced through it, and her eyes matched her natural hued tresses. Her skin was unblemished and as pale as death itself, but her cheeks were a faint pink as if she'd just been caught doing some she shouldn't, and I smirked inwardly at what that something could be.

Other than that, she bore no other shade but black.

She wore tight-fitting clothes—a zipped-up leather jacket, fishnet stockings with combat boots, and a mini skirt with ruffles.

Her lipstick was a copper black, and her mascara was thick, her eye shadow creating a dramatic flare outwards.

People at school thought she was weird.

So did I, up until this point.

Because with no hot girls in sight, and noting the fact that she was wearing leather, boots, and a skirt so short that the fishnet stockings only barely hid her panties, I could definitely say that she looked kind of sexy.

She definitely had the potential.

Being sexy didn't excuse her from being in my way though.

I really needed to piss.

"Either take a shit or get out," I told her.

Her brown eyes widened with surprise but then narrowed into slits when she realised what I'd said.

"How about no, asshole."

I felt myself take a step back in surprise.

No one ever talked back to me!

She had a lot to learn.

I glared at her. "Leave or else."

She was shockingly unperturbed as she leant against the wall.

"This isn't your damn bathroom. I can sit here all I want. You can't move me even if you want to."

"And why is that?"

"Because I'll kick your ass."

I laughed.

"Yeah right."

"Try me; I _dare _you."

"Look, I'm warning you now. I don't like to hurt girls, but you're about to push me to my limit."

"Oooh, I'm so scared." She smirked.

Hadn't this girl heard of me before?

Surely she wasn't so much of a nobody that she hadn't heard of how many times I'd gotten suspended for beating people up because they'd pissed me off.

Even Eric Yorkie, the ultimate school nerd, knew about my reputation.

She was really asking for it.

Fury, evident in both my stride and on my face, consumed me as I stormed over to her and reached for her arms so I could force her out of the room.

As preoccupied as I was by the composed look on her face as I grabbed her, I didn't notice when she swung her leg upwards.

Right into the area that mattered the most.

"Fuck!" I yelled, my hands instinctively moving towards my crotch. "You motherfucking bitch!"

She grinned triumphantly and her brown eyes shone with smugness as she watched me stagger back a few steps and bend over from the agony of it all, my face screwed up in pain.

"Don't mess with me!" she said.

"I hope you die in this shit hole," I gasped at her as I limped over to the door, still hunched over, and fumbled with the doorknob.

"Well, it'd be better than spending the night with you."

"Touché," I muttered, trying fiercely to open the door.

It wouldn't budge.

No matter how hard I jiggled it, it still wouldn't give way.

"Fuck!"

"Get over it already; I'm sure it's not as painful as you guys say it is."

"I'm not talking about that, shithead; the fucking door won't open."

"Yeah right it won't. You just want me to get up so you can push me out of the room, and believe me, I kicked you there once; I can do it again."

I groaned in frustration.

"I don't give a shit about that any more. Just get the damn door to open!"

"Do it yourself," she said nonchalantly, examining her black nail polish with fake interest.

"I thought you wanted me to leave?"

"It's so much more fun watching you struggle though."

I fiddled with the doorknob one last time.

Nothing changed.

I pummelled my fists against the door and kicked it with as much force as I was capable of. The resulting pain was almost as bad as the pain in my loins. "Fuck! Now we're both stuck in here."

She shrugged.

"I have to stay in here anyway. There's no way I'm going out there again."

She seemed to openly detest me. What the hell could possibly be worse than being forced to hang out with your worst enemy?

"What happened?" I asked curiously, sliding my back down the door and leaning against it once I was sitting cross-legged on the tiles.

She snorted. "Like I want to tell you."

"Well, we've got nothing better to do. If I can't get the door open then you definitely can't."

She huffed. "Stupid sexist bastard."

"I'm not being sexist…the simple fact is, if I can't do it, no one can," I told her.

"Your conceitedness is so irritating."

"Well, your face is irritating," I muttered.

Something I couldn't interpret flashed across hers. "Look, while we're stuck here together, I'd appreciate it if you wouldn't be an ass."

"Says the person who called me an asshole."

"It was well-deserved."

"To you," I amended angrily. "Look, don't piss me off and I won't be rude."

"I piss you off just by being here," she said dryly.

"Good point."

There was about five minutes of silence, each of us staring at separate walls, avoiding each other's eyes, before anything happened.

Suddenly, she spoke, her words spilling out in a torrent. "Look, I can't stand just sitting here and not saying anything for who knows how long. Why don't we start over? I didn't kick you in the balls, and you didn't say crude things to me. Okay?"

Well, if this would stop her from being an arrogant bitch…

It might even dissipate my incessant stream of boredom a little…

"Okay," I agreed grudgingly.

She relaxed a little, her back sagging against the wall.

"Well, I know who you are, but do you know who I am?"

For a Goth, this girl was strangely bubbly when she wasn't swearing her head off or kicking me in the nuts.

"Not really," I admitted. "I know your dad, though. He's the police of chief, and he absolutely hates my fucking guts. I bet you hear about me all the time from him."

She shrugged.

"Not really; he keeps his work to himself. I know you from school. Edward Cullen, right?"

Who didn't know me?

"Yep, the one and only."

"I thought so," she murmured.

"Who are you? I'm still trying to figure out your name."

"Bella."

That so wasn't what I was expecting.

It was too…feminine.

Too light and pleasant sounding.

I had no idea what I thought it was but it definitely wasn't that.

"Oh."

"Mistake me with someone else? Or do you have an issue with my name?" she hissed.

"No…no, it's a cool name…pretty," I stumbled.

Wait!

What the hell just happened?

I never had to backtrack.

I said whatever I wanted to say whether people liked it or not.

Even though _Bella _and I had made a truce, that didn't mean that I was planning to uphold it.

Why had I automatically corrected my reply?

She wasn't the boss of me!

"Thanks," she muttered. "Your name is… interesting."

"My parents are old-fashioned; you got a problem with that?" I snapped.

She sent me a warning glare. "Remember what you agreed to."

I rolled my eyes. "Take your own advice."

"I think we should change the subject," she said hastily.

"To what? What I ate for dinner?" I mocked.

"You're an ass, you know that. If you don't want to talk then fine, sit in fucking silence."

"Gladly," I hissed.

This time, we lasted fifteen minutes before either of us made a move. Feeling a nicotine craving, and at a lack for anything else to do, I pulled out the packet of cigarettes and a lighter from my pocket, and was about to light the cigarette I'd pulled out, but was stopped when I heard Bella's appalled voice.

"You can't smoke in here!"

"Why not?"

"Because it's a bathroom, that's so unhygienic and disgusting."

"Too bad," I muttered, raising the lighter to the cigarette I held.

"I'm an asthmatic," she said desperately, her eyes wild with anxiety.

Well, shit!

"Of course you fucking are."

"I can't help it, I was born with it. It's a death stick anyway. I wouldn't smoke it even if I could," she said passionately.

I dropped the cigarette I was holding.

"You're a freaking Goth and you're against smoking?" I asked in disbelief.

She glared at me. "It's a clothing style choice, not a religion. I'm not in a cult and I'm not a Satan worshiper either, if that's what you think."

"Then what the hell are you?" I said.

She shifted a little to the right and looked down, crimson red pooling her cheeks.

I gathered that she was somehow embarrassed by my question.

"I guess that's what this is," she whispered. "I don't know who I am; I'm trying to find that out. This is just an experiment."

"What? Your clothing choice?" I asked seriously, all malice gone.

It looked like I was finally going to discover the enigma of this girl.

"Not just that." She sighed. "Tonight. Going to this stupid party."

Without even consciously telling myself to do so, I got up and sat next to her, leaning my back against the wall like she did.

We were still a comfortable distance away but it felt right to be as close as I was instead of on the other side of the room.

I didn't dare go any closer though; I didn't think my balls could take any more pain.

"That makes two of us." I nodded. "I wanna get the fuck out of here too."

She chuckled, but the sound was a little bitter.

"At least you can go eventually, I'm stuck here whether the door's locked or not."

"I don't understand…"

"I'm not expecting you to. You wouldn't give a fuck anyway."

"Try me," I said softly.

She shook her head. "What the hell happened to you? Are you bipolar or something?"

I ignored the jibe.

"Well, you obviously have a fucking problem, and I want you to tell me about it. While we're stuck in here you might as well."

"Whatever."

"Seriously, Bella, in all honesty, I want to hear what you have to say. I doubt you've had a chance to let it all out."

"No, I haven't." She took a deep breath.

I waited, holding my own.

I was so damn curious about what her deal was.

She exhaled, and then clasped her hands together nervously. "Fine. I know you're an ass most of the time but I'm trusting you to have the sense to keep this a secret. Just please don't tell anyone, please."

Her eyes were frantic with worry that she'd made the wrong decision, but by the way she bit her lip, I could tell how very much she needed to tell someone about her problems.

Even without her desperation causing me to pity her, I knew I still would've kept her story a secret. I could tell how important this was, even with her not having said a thing.

I wasn't that big of an ass to ruin someone's life like that.

"I promise."

"Well… I have no idea how to start. Dammit, this is so difficult," she murmured after a minute of silence.

"You said something about an experiment," I prompted. "What was that about?"

She fiddled with the zipper of her jacket, looking down again. "Alice invited me to this party, but she said I could only go if I took a date. I said I didn't have one, so she set me up with one."

"Let me guess, he's an asshole like me," I presumed.

She laughed bitterly. "Yeah, right, I wish."

"Then what…" I trailed off.

"I was so excited, you know. She said this person really liked me and a guy's never liked me before, so I put a lot of effort into my clothes and hair and, for weeks, the party was all I talked about with my friends. I told them about my mystery guy, and they were all very happy for me."

Her expression darkened as she continued.

"I also told a few of the sluts that hate my ass. They were teasing me about not having a boyfriend because I was weird, and so I told them about my mystery guy. I could tell they didn't believe me, and that heightened my anticipation for the party even more. I couldn't wait to walk in with him and see the looks on their pathetic, bitchy faces when they saw us together."

"I don't see, what's the problem? Was he Eric Yorkie or something?" I asked, utterly confused.

"No."

Tears filled to the brim of her brown eyes and threatened to spill over as she said that one syllable.

"He didn't even exist. Alice made him up just so I'd go to her party, and had someone to make fun of. Lucky I arrived early otherwise everyone would've seen. I have to hide up here until everyone leaves, otherwise everyone will think I'm a lying bitch. I'm going to look so stupid!"

At her last words, her tears spilled over and began to stream down her cheeks incessantly, revealing the insecure girl she truly was. Her bitchy, Goth façade was just a mask, a tool devised to keep her emotions under control. I knew the issue that she'd told me she was facing was not the only one.

I could tell that her tears were for things much worse.

My hate for her suddenly vanished.

We were more alike than I thought.

She wiped her tears away with her shaking hands, and then, without warning, she began to sob, loud and uncontrollable noises that made me flinch. She didn't even try to cover her face with her hands like most girls did; she just sat there and openly cried in front of me.

Perhaps she'd forgotten I was there in her melancholy.

I shifted closer to her, unsure of what to do, but wanting to offer her some form of comfort. The second my arm brushed slightly against hers, she turned to me, sobs still escaping her as she did so, and buried her face into my shoulder, staining my t-shirt with tears.

I rubbed her back awkwardly, uncertain of what words I could give which would effectively ease her pain.

However, despite my dissatisfaction at my lack of help, it seemed that simply being here was enough, because her sobs grew less pained, and her cries seemed more of an outlet than a loss of control as she clutched at me.

However, her hysteric behaviour didn't cease, even after five minutes.

All I could do was stroke her dark hair tentatively, and continue to hope that she would recover from her break-down soon.

I found that I kind of liked stroking her hair.

It was something I'd never done before.

I fucked easy girls.

That was it.

I'd never liked a person strongly enough to follow a relationship through to a point where I was affectionate of my own accord.

Why was this so suddenly changing?

Why did I feel like taking her into my arms and hugging her as tightly as possible?

Why did I suddenly feel such an intense explosion of sympathy for this girl?

Why did I _want _to know her?

To fix her problem?

To make sure that I'd never see her cry like this ever again?

Why didn't I want the bathroom door to ever be unlocked?

This was crazy…this was bullshit.

My feelings made no damn sense.

I was so confused…

"What can I do?" I asked eventually, softly.

She pulled back from me, wiping her tears away again and smiling sadly. "There's nothing you can do. Nothing can fix this shit I've gotten myself into."

"Fuck, there's got to be something!"

"What?" she asked desperately.

Suddenly, the solution was obvious.

So very obvious.

It was all up to me, on whether I was selfish or not.

I could fix all of her problems in five minutes.

It would cause me some issues of my own, but they were minor ones.

Was I willing to let that happen?

Was I really so much of an ass that I would let such a simple solution slide?

I didn't know the answer to that one.

But I did know that the solution I was considering kind of excited me for some insane reason.

I didn't understand why I felt this way, but I did know what I felt.

There really was only one choice.

"I'm your mystery guy. I'll walk out there with you and pretend to be him," I told her, regarding her carefully for her reaction.

Her mouth dropped open and then her eyes flashed with anger.

"That's not funny, Edward."

"I'm being serious here. I'll tell all those girls that I'm him."

"But…but…" she stuttered.

"But?" I pressed.

"It's Valentine's Day, there's no doubt that you'll be expected to be amorous at this party."

"So what?"

She gaped. "So what? This is coming from the guy who called me a bitch, not half an hour ago."

"I'm past all that now. I'm willing to do this for you."

"Because you feel sorry for me," she said bitterly.

"No," I replied instantly. "Because you're my friend and I'd like to do this for you."

"We only met an hour ago. I thought you hated me."

"That's enough time to become friends, and I don't hate you. Our meeting wasn't exactly the best fucking meeting ever, but I'm over all that."

"You don't know what you're getting yourself into."

"Oh, trust me, I know."

She looked me in the eye. "I will be forever grateful if you do this, but are you being completely serious about this? If you're not, tell me now. I'll understand."

"I am being completelyserious," I told her without difficulty.

She let out a deep breath and smiled. "So you're my date tonight?"

"I'm your date tonight." I took her hand and squeezed it. "But before we even think about any of that, we need to get the fucking door open."

Her eyes lit up. "I know how to lock pick."

"Go do it then; open that motherfucker up." I grinned.

…

I knew the girls Bella had told me about the second I saw them, and not just because of their skanky clothes and the excessive coating of make-up on their faces.

It was because one of them dropped their cup and the other spit theirs out when they saw us approaching them, hands linked.

Bella was practically glowing when she introduced us.

"Guys, this is Edward, my date who I told you about."

"Hi," I said stiffly.

They both eyed me appreciatively but glared daggers at Bella once they'd sufficiently ogled me.

"Took you a while to arrive," the one with the shoulder length, raven-black hair sneered after she'd recovered from her beer spillage.

"Something came up, but I made it," Bella lied, averting her eyes.

I suppressed a smile at how awful her deceptive skills were.

"We can see that," the brunette muttered.

"Well, I just came over here to say hi," Bella said before smiling at them sweetly and pulling me to the dance-floor, where a large crowd still mingled.

"Thank you so much." She gave me a quick hug, blushing when she pulled back.

"Well, it fixed most of your shit up, didn't it?" I grinned. "Now, I usually hate dancing but while we're here, I might as well dance with you. It would look weird if we don't."

"So do I, but I think I'll make an exception. Just don't freak out when I step on your foot."

"Same to you."

I pulled her into my arms and began to sway with her gently to the slow tempo music.

"What the hell happened to you? I still can't figure it out?" she asked, her eyes shining with bliss.

"I don't even know," I said truthfully. "I'll tell you when I figure it out."

We were interrupted by the sound of Alice Brandon's high-pitched voice over a megaphone.

"At the count of three, all the couples need to kiss. It's a tradition for my Valentine's Day parties. Got that?"

The crowd cheered in encouragement.

"One…"

Bella looked shyly up at me, her expression hesitant.

"Two…"

Should I? Should I not?

"Three!" she yelled.

Ah, screw it.

I was too far gone to care about anything any more.

I liked her, okay?

I fucking admitted it.

Then, to prove my point, I slid my hands down to her hips and wrapped my arms around her waist before leaning in and kissing her with the vigour I felt.

She tasted like sunshine, like life, and her kisses were fucking happiness. I couldn't pull back because I was already addicted; her lips against mine were too good to bear.

When we were forced to part, I simply moved my lips to her ear and whispered.

"You, the most fucking amazing girl ever, are what happened to me."

And it was true.

Who knew that the asshole and the Goth could make such an awesome pair?

We certainly didn't.

Not until we were locked into a bathroom together and forced to make conversation.

It's funny how life works.

* * *

**If you liked this one-shot then please review :)  
**


	8. Marry Me First

**Marry Me First**

**Challenge Number/Title: 8# Talk My Ear Off**  
**Date Posted: 19/3/13**

**Fandom: Twilight**  
** Rating: T**  
** Genre: AU, set at the end of New Moon**  
** Content Descriptors: Romance** **and** **fluff**  
** Character Pairing: Edward and Bella**

**Summary: **What if Bella had a positive reaction to Edward's proposal at the end of New Moon?

* * *

"_Marry me first."_

"What?" I whispered, my eyes widening in shock.

He wanted to _marry _me?

Out of all the conditions he could've set this was the one, which I least expected.

My epiphany had proved that he loved me… but marriage?

I didn't know what to say.

"Marry me," he said again, this time softly.

"We've never discussed this before."

"I know, but would you at least consider it?"

I looked down, refusing to meet his cautious gaze.

"Marriage…it's a big thing."

"Yes it is," he agreed. "But I've been waiting over a hundred years for you. I'm ready to make the commitment."

"Where is this coming from?" I asked bewilderedly. "Did you just think of that on the spot or..."

"No, I've been thinking about this for a while."

"How long?"

He sighed. "Well technically I've been thinking about it the second I realised I loved you, but if you mean the actual act of asking you to marry me, then I've been considering that for months."

"Months," I repeated, dazed. "Even when you were gone?"

He flinched. "Especially then."

"But I thought…"

"You have no idea how many times I almost came back, the effort it took to stop myself from begging at your doorstep for your forgiveness. My mind liked to torture me with everything that could've been. I imagined so many things, Bella, envisioned the life we would have had if you accepted me back, so many times."

His voice had now reduced to a pained whisper.

"I imagined it the other way as well, thought of what would occur if I continued to stay away and let you be with someone else, if you married someone else. Nothing killed me more than to think of that. I know you see marriage in a different light than I do but for me, marriage is a declaration of love, the absolute assurance that you want to spend the rest of your life with that person and that you trust them with all of your being. To think of you pledging yourself that way to someone else was utter agony, Bella."

"So yes, I have been thinking about this for a while. Now that I'm back and here to stay, I want this for us. I want more than anything for us to be husband and wife. I love you, and I want the whole world to know it. I want to promise to you that we'll always be together, and that through sickness and health I will always love you. I want to be yours in every way possible. So, this is my condition. If you wish to be linked to me forever in literal terms, then it would make sense for us to be linked forever in an emotional sense as well. It's all I want for us. I love you, please agree to be my wife."

Tears slipped down my cheeks and I wiped them away, embarrassed by how affected I was by his words.

Oh, Edward.

"I do love you, but I'm only eighteen," was all I could manage to say.

He took my hands in his and smiled slightly. "I always underestimated how you felt about me before our separation, but your unfailing courage in Italy made me realise the truth. I know you love me so why does anything else matter? "

"I don't even know anymore. I'm so confused!" I admitted.

He cocked his head slightly to the side. "What's there to be confused about?"

"I've never been fond of the concept of marriage, I think it's because my parents divorced when I was really young, but what you just said, well it…I don't know what to think any more."

"If you need time, I can give that to you," he offered. "I just want you to consider my proposal."

Another horrifying thought occurred to me. "What will people think? My parents, Jessica, Angela, Lauren, the whole of Forks…"

"I don't care in the slightest. They can think whatever they please. As long as you love me, as long as you want to be with me, I don't see why they matter."

"When would we get married?"

"Whenever you like. Whether it's now or five years from now, it doesn't really matter, as long as I know you've agreed to be my wife. That's all I need."

"What would you do if I said yes?" I said cautiously, examining his expression for any changes.

His entire face lit up and he smiled. "Well then I'd be the happiest man on earth."

Only then, did I realise how much this meant to him.

I used to think marriage was just a piece of paper.

I now knew this wasn't the case.

It was a promise, a promise of love.

I'd always known that I was going to marry him one day.

I just hadn't known it would be this soon.

Why did I need to delay it?

If I was going to become a vampire then time, my young age and my societies strict rules would soon cease to be.

I knew what I had to say.

"Yes then. Yes, I'll marry you," I told him, conviction and rightness emphasised in my every word.

His golden eyes shone with triumph and suddenly we were both off my bed and I was in his arms.

"Yes?" he asked before kissing me fiercely.

"Yes." I laughed when we broke apart. "Yes I will."

"I love you, Bella Swan," he told me adoringly.

I grinned. "I love you more."

"You have no idea how happy this makes me."

"I think I have an idea."

"When do you want to get married?" he asked.

"I don't know yet, just that I do,"

"That's enough for me."

"So do I get a ring?" I asked, smiling.

"Of course. I can go get it right now if you wish."

I clutched his shirt. "Don't go yet. I want to cherish this moment forever."

He smiled. "You're right. The ring can wait."

So we let ourselves have our moment, knowing the path ahead would be difficult, but that it would also be a happy one, because we were together.

And that was all that mattered.

* * *

**For some reason, I'm not too happy with this one-shot, but if you liked it then please review :)**


	9. The Wish

**The Wish**

**Challenge Number/Title: 9# Finish It With...**  
**Date Posted: 26/3/13**

**Fandom: Twilight**  
** Rating: T**  
** Genre: AH**  
** Content Descriptors: Romance, angst and hurt/comfort **  
** Character Pairing: Edward and Bella**

******Summary:** **Bella is granted her deepest wish when she is reunited with her deceased love by being sent back in time to the day he died. However, saving Edward from his imminent death proves to be harder than she originally thought.  
**

* * *

"It's time for cake," Alice said softly behind me, putting her hand lightly on my shoulder.

I acted as if I hadn't heard her, staring blankly out the window as I had been for the past two hours.

"It's your birthday, people are waiting for you to make a proper appearance. It's bad enough that you've been standing here the whole party, not talking to anyone, the least you can do is participate in the cutting of the cake."

I remained silent.

"Just do this one little thing, and then you can go upstairs. I'll send everyone home, all-right?"

I shifted forward a little, shrugging her hand off my shoulder.

She sighed.

"Look, you can't keep shutting yourself away from people. I know this party was a mistake but it'd be great if you could just go out there and blow out the candles on the cake. I know Edw…"

Her words trailed off when I twisted around and glared at her, tears forming in the corner of my eyes.

"Don't say his name," I whispered harshly, clenching my fists so tightly that they grew white.

The first syllable of his name was enough to trigger his face in my thoughts.

The sight of it was pure agony.

I felt as if someone had knocked the breath out of me.

My chest felt as if it had been gorged open with a knife.

I knew no greater pain.

Her gray eyes flickered with remorse. "Bella, he wouldn't want you to be like this."

"Like what? A mess? You know he would be too if the situation was reversed."

"The accident wasn't your fault."

I flinched.

"We both know it was," I said quietly.

Neither of us spoke for another minute.

"You've got to let go of your guilt, Bella, it's going to eat you alive," she whispered.

"The whole thing was my idea…he'd still be here if I hadn't…" My voice broke off, the tears threatening to spill.

"You were both drunk. You didn't know what you were doing. You didn't push him off the balcony, you know he fell."

"He was up there because of me."

She exhaled sharply.

"I'm not going to argue with you on this. It was an accident and everyone but you agrees with me."

I shook my head.

"Please, do this for him. You know how much he wanted to throw this party for you. Your twenty first is so important."

"You have no _idea _of what he wanted. Stop acting as if you knew him as well as I did!" I snapped at her.

Hurt crossed her features and she looked down. "He was my friend too."

"At least you weren't in love with him."

There was a moment of silence.

Then the flood of tears I'd been trying fruitlessly to hold back broke free and tears began to stream incessently down my cheeks. I hugged my friend tightly, crying into her shoulder. She patted my back in a manner that was supposed to be soothing, but actually made me feel slightly worse.

"I didn't even get to tell him how I felt. He never knew that I loved him, he won't ever know," I blubbered, wincing when an unbidden memory of 'that night' flashed in my mind.

"I'm sure he did know. He loved you too, you know, anybody could see that."

"How do you know? He never said anything."

"He was just as scared as you, he didn't want to be rejected. We could all tell."

I stepped back sharply and grabbed both of her arms, grasping them tightly and shaking them. "Why did they have to take him from me Alice, why! Even if he didn't love me the way I loved him, he was still my best friend and I miss him so much. Some days I just want to end it all."

She cringed, prying her arms out of my grip with difficulty. "I don't know, don't talk like that, Bella. You still have so much to live for."

"Why couldn't it have been me?" I whimpered. "Why?"

The question had been tormenting me for months, ever since July nineteenth, the night of the accident.

"Come on, don't think like that, it's your birthday. Try to forget about all this."

"I don't want to ever forget him."

"I didn't mean that, I meant to forget about what happened for at least tonight. You should at least try and enjoy yourself."

"That's impossible without him." I sighed, wiping away my tears. "But I'll do what you want. Just please let me go home after I've done it, I need to be alone."

Her eyes softened. "Of course."

Then she took my hand and led me into her spacious living room where thirty or so people surrounded a tiny table with a massive chocolate cake atop it.

They all smiled in a friendly fashion at me as they parted so that Alice and I could reach the table.

Suddenly I felt sick.

Most of their smiles were of pity.

My tears had not dried yet; they could see my pain.

I wanted to scream for them to leave me alone and to go home but I knew doing so would achieve nothing.

Nothing could bring him back.

I stared at the floorboards as they sang the traditional birthday song, not wanting to meet their eyes as they stared at me, not wanting them to see how close I was to breaking apart.

Then it was my queue to blow out the candles.

"Make a wish," a girl who I didn't recognise called out to me.

To my surprise, I did.

_I wish I'd told Edward how much I loved him before he died. _

Then, to my shock, my vision went blurry and I sank to the floor, my head spinning and my heart beating insanely fast. I knew I was on the brink of unconsciousness.

Then everything did go black.

…

When I opened my eyes, I was startled to find that I wasn't where I was expecting to be.

Hell, I wasn't even at Alice's place anymore.

I was in _his _house, in _his _room to be precise.

How the fuck did I get in here?

And why was all _his_ stuff still here?

His parents had boxed his belongings up because they couldn't bear to look at them any more. I had also taken some of his things to help remember him by.

What was going on?

"Alice?" I called out unsteadily.

"Bella, what's wrong? Alice left a while ago."

No, it couldn't be…

I had to dreaming…or dead…or both.

It was _his _voice!

I turned around slowly, gasping and covering my mouth when I saw that my assumption was indeed correct.

Edward Cullen, my best friend and the man that I loved, was standing in front of me, gazing at me with concern.

However that wasn't the only shocking part.

The other shocking part was that he was wearing the tight black t-shirt and jeans he'd died in.

I must be hallucinating, that was the only plausible option.

"Edward?" I said, dazed.

"Is something up? I'm just about ready to leave, are you?" he asked, running a hand through the bronze hair that I loved so much.

"Leave…what…why?"

He couldn't leave!

Not when I'd just found him again!

Not when he could disappear at any given second.

My hands shook and my body surged with dread.

He laughed. "We're going to Emmett's eighteenth. Where else?"

I felt my heart sink even further than it already had.

Emmett's party was where _it _had happened.

Had I died when I'd slipped into unconsciousness?

Was this my punishment for letting Edward die, to relive this day over and over again?

It didn't seem too bad an ordeal if I could be with him.

Was I crazy for not deeming this to be the worst form of torture, for finding solace in the fact that I could spend the rest of my days with him, even if he was more or less a ghost?

I guess I was.

"Oh, yeah, how stupid of me," I said shakily.

He walked over to me, his green eyes touched with worry and his brow furrowed. "Are you sure you're okay?"

Then before I could stop myself, I wrapped my arms around him and hugged him as tightly as my arms would allow.

Warmth enveloped me instantly and his honey-lilac-sun fragrance invigorated my senses, making me sigh in ecstasy.

He was really here!

I was really hugging him!

I didn't care how impossible it was; I just focused on the fact that I was able to see him and touch him again.

His arms encircled my waist and he kissed my forehead softly.

He only did that when he was truly worried about me.

My hands found his face and tears began to trickle down my cheeks. "I just missed you."

"I haven't gone anywhere," he said, bewildered. "Why are you crying?"

I just shook my head, both sobbing and marveling over the fact that I was in his arms again.

Despite his confusion, he didn't ask any more questions, simply comforting me with his touch.

It wasn't long before he sighed and expressed his thoughts. "What's wrong? Did I do something?"

I smiled up at him, unable to conceal my bliss at being in his arms again. "No, I'm just so glad you're here."

He looked very perplexed but let the issue slide.

"We really need to get going," he murmured, glancing at the wall clock to our left.

My face fell.

"Do we have to go to Emmett's party?"

I didn't want to watch him die again; it'd be too much.

Perhaps I could prevent his death.

Maybe we could be together after all, even if it was in this weird other dimension.

As long as I was with him, I didn't care.

"Why, don't you want to go anymore?" he asked softly, wiping away my tears with the pads of his thumbs.

I shook my head. "Can't we do something else?"

"Unfortunately, we have to go, I promised Emmett we would. I've got to say that speech, remember?"

"Are you sure?" I pressed.

"Yes."

"There's no way we can get out of it."

He frowned.

"I don't think so. Why don't you want to go anymore?"

"Just promise me you won't go upstairs," I blurted, ignoring his question.

His eyes crinkled up in confusion.

"Why?"

"Just please don't!"

Even he could sense the desperation in my tone. "All right."

"Good." I let out a big gust of breath, hugging him more tightly in relief.

"Come on, we're late as it is."

I sighed, knowing there was nothing I could say to keep him from attending this party.

He stepped back, squeezed my hand, turned around and walked towards the door, knowing without words that I would follow him.

"Wait! Edward!"

Suddenly, I remembered the wish I'd made on my birthday.

He twisted around and looked at me expectantly.

"I…I…the thing is…never mind." I blushed, looking away.

Even given this second chance, I still couldn't say the words.

I was such a coward.

"Yes?" he asked, cocking his head to the side.

"Uh…don't worry. I'll tell you later."

"Right," he muttered before turning back around.

As I followed him out of the door, I made a promise to myself.

Edward was going to know how I felt about him tonight, whether I could prevent his death or not.

…

"Hey guys, you made it!" Emmett exclaimed, giving me a brief smile and clapping Edward on the back.

Despite the lengths I'd taken to prevent Edward from reaching this party, we were here.

I'd tried everything I could think of; hiding his keys so he couldn't drive, getting us lost, pretending I was sick…

The last one would've worked exceptionally if Edward weren't such a good guy.

He offered to spend the night with me at my house until I felt better except he wanted to drop in at the party and wish Emmett a happy birthday beforehand while I waited at my house for him to come back.

I wasn't going to take any chances.

Anything could entice him to stay at the party.

It'd be much safer for me to be there with him, regardless of how long he decided to stay.

So I put on a brave face and told him the sick feeling had passed.

He didn't look convinced but drove us to the party anyway, glancing at me every few minutes to check if I was all right.

I definitely didn't feel all right.

Stress and fear would continue to plague me until I knew he was safe from the clutches of death.

"We were a little delayed," Edward replied warily, answering a question I hadn't heard.

"It's all good, man. I'm still waiting on some assholes who haven't arrived yet."

"Royce King and his buddies?"

"You guessed it. The weird thing is that his girlfriend has arrived…alone. Maybe she needs some company." He smirked. "Rosalie Hale is fucking hot."

"I'd watch my face if I were you, it may be your party but Royce doesn't give a shit," Edward called out to him as he walked away.

Emmett simply grinned and was then lost in the crowd of people.

Royce King wouldn't show up, Emmett had Rosalie all to himself tonight.

It was exactly like before.

Even the words Emmett had used were the same.

The thought made my blood run cold.

"Are you sure you're feeling okay? You haven't said anything in ages," Edward asked me, concern touching his features once again.

I sighed.

"I'm fine."

"Seriously?" he pressed.

"Seriously."

He smiled hesitantly. "Okay then, why don't we go find the booze stash then. I think we both need to lighten up."

"No!" I gasped.

If we'd been clear-headed that night, we'd have never gone up on Emmett's balcony.

I hadn't touched the poison since that night.

None of us were getting drunk tonight.

Not if I could help it.

"What?"

"Uh…um…"

I needed to come up with something to distract him. If I told him he couldn't drink any alcohol then he'd drink it for sure. It was such a male thing to do.

Even Edward wasn't perfect.

"Er…I need to tell you something. Want to go for a walk?"

"But we just got here," he said in bewilderment.

"It's really important. It'll only take five minutes," I promised.

He stared deeply into my eyes for a few seconds, searching for something I wasn't sure he'd find.

Then his mouth parted with realisation and he sighed, his eyes flickering in the direction of the door.

"Okay, we'll take as long as you want. Just please promise me you'll try and enjoy yourself when we get back. You know you can tell me anything, right?"

"Right," I affirmed.

Even though his words were in the wrong context, they were still true.

"We'll be back," he murmured to Emmett as we passed him in the growing throng of people.

Emmett was too busy eyeing Rosalie Hale to notice us.

I knew he wouldn't notice our absence either.

I followed Edward quickly out of the house and down the porch steps to the path.

Relief, so intense that it made me physically gasp, swept through me in a whirlwind of emotion and I felt slightly giddy as we walked further and further away from the house.

Maybe I could save him.

Maybe he didn't have to die.

Maybe this was my second chance.

Hope arose in me like a beacon in a sea of endless darkness.

I could change the horrible fate we faced.

I just needed to keep him away from the balcony.

When we'd reached a sensible distance from the house, Edward stopped, turning around and taking my hands in his.

"Bella, please. I need to know what's wrong. It's killing me to see you like this. I need to know why you're so sad," he said gently.

Then, for the first time that night, I told him the truth.

I couldn't contain my fears any more.

"I'm so scared you're going to leave me," I whispered.

His green eyes grew incredibly soft.

"Where's this coming from?" he asked, raising his hand to my face and wiping away the tears that I hadn't even realised had fallen. "I'm not going anywhere. I'm still going to the University of Alaska with you; I don't care what my father says. You're my best friend."

I shook my head. "It's not that."

"Then why do you think I'm going to leave you? I would never do that."

"That's the thing. You don't have a choice."

"What do you mean? I'm not going to let anything separate us. What is it, Bella? What are you scared of?"

"Can you stop death?" I whispered.

His eyes widened in surprise. "What?"

"What if you die, what then?"

"Bella, I'm not going to die. I'm going to live a good sixty years more before that happens," he assured me confidently. "I'm never going to leave you."

Then the floodgates flung open and I was sobbing uncontrollably.

He really had no idea.

He was oblivious as to how fragile his life was.

This hope I held onto was all I had left.

If I lost him again, I wouldn't survive this time.

He had to live.

I had to save him!

He had to understand!

I clutched to him feverishly and cried openly into his shoulder, using his body as support. He held me tightly, sensing how much I needed him, how much I hurt.

I had to save him!

_I had to save him!_

Then my tears came to an abrupt halt as I realised what I needed to tell him.

He needed to know.

He needed to survive!

"Edward," I rasped, looking up into his frightened eyes. "Edward!"

His eyes sought mine and he stared into them intensely. "Tell me. Whatever it is, tell me."

Without thinking, without making any conscious move to do what I did, I yanked him forward by his arm and kissed him fiercely.

He tasted like honey, like the greatest substance on earth. His lips felt amazing against mine, perfect, warm, wet… nothing could compare to how good this felt.

All my worries, all of my fears slipped away as he kissed me back.

It was just the two of us.

Death was just a word.

The future was irrelevant.

The only thing that mattered was his mouth on mine, and the inferno it created inside of me, the passion that it sparked between us.

I'd been fighting this urge for so long, afraid of the reaction I would receive, and I felt as if I were floating now, as if every worry that I'd ever had, had never existed in the first place.

It felt so good to let go; it was such a relief!

How had I lived without this for so long?

He was all I wanted.

All I needed.

We broke apart abruptly, the both of us gasping for air.

I told him the only thing that made sense any more.

"I love you," I said softly, caressing his cheek with the back of my hand.

He looked lost for words, but his eyes were bright like the sun.

He pulled me in for a tight embrace, whispering in my ear of how he loved me too, of how he had always loved me.

Before I knew it, we were walking down the path again, his hand in mine, sharing stray kisses every ten seconds or so.

I didn't care what happened now.

Nothing mattered as long as I got to stay with him.

…

Death is inevitable.

I learned this the hard way.

Edward Cullen, my best friend, my lover, was meant to die on that night.

A speeding truck on a vacant road we crossed, proved this.

Nothing I could've done would've stopped his death; all I could do was alter the circumstances.

So despite my resolve to save him, I failed.

However this time we died together, in each other's arms to be exact.

So I died, content.

You only live once, but life is only worth it if you have someone to help you through it.

Despite the infinite darkness, I knew I was with Edward, and that was enough.

* * *

**Please review :) **

**I have no idea what the reaction for this one-shot will be and I'm a little worried to be honest, so if you liked it, then please review :)  
**


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